Josh @FullPtrXception
Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so call me Ishmael Joined April 2009-
Tweets3K
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Followers46
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Following96
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Likes19
If there were a movie called Runaway Ferris Wheel I'd watch the shit out of it.
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Josh retweeted
saw a guy parallel park and asked him if he'd like to go on a cruise to a faraway island called My Pussy
Josh retweeted
"Budweiser crowded out by craft beer craze" more like "People finally realize Budweiser is awful"
Josh retweeted
These sets all have the same mean, median and variance. Lesson: Always Visualise. #StrataHadoop @statistiekcbs
Josh retweeted
relationships are like me they suck balls
when life gives you lemons, no it didn't, shutup.
And @CBFreePO 's boner has a magnetic tip to help hold the screws #Utilidick
And @CBFreePO 's boner has a phillip's head #Utilidick
And @CBFreePO 's balls are hooked to pull out nails. #Utilidick
@CBFreePO 's boner is so heavy he can use it in lieu of a hammer #Utilidick
Josh retweeted
All the MBMBaM Jingles, courtesy of @LadyHandmaid bit.ly/1qo0XkX
Josh retweeted
@TheKrisWilson He turns around. "It also has Nutflix". He flashes his genitals, is removed from the bar, and must register as a sex offender
Josh retweeted
Josh retweeted
Don't worry everyone, Apple understands The Cloud. I mean, they can't figure out how to distribute video to non-Apple devices, but whatever.
One time I threw a football so hard I dropped my whiskey, but it was okay because I caught the whiskey with my elaphant trunk dick
Josh retweeted
John Connor: There's no fate but what we make for ourselves. Programmers: There's no web application framework but what we make ourselves.
Josh retweeted
If Java was a boyfriend, I'd write a song about how shitty they were to me and how much they made me cry.
Lucy was really very good, although there were a couple spots where it was clearly a writer just writing things that sounded sciency
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