Kristal @Hello_Kristal

I'm a loner, a rebel, you don't wanna get mixed up with a girl like me. Joined December 2011

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Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes

a month ago

They say 'the machines of the future' will be as smart as people... OK, but WHICH people? Because it kinda matters quite a bit.

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⋆⁺₊⋆ MJ Sparkles⋆⁺₊⋆ @MxJosied

3 years ago

Recording Petticoat Lane on Twitch! Come learn about periods and home remedies with us! #periods #WomensHealth Twitch.tv/mxjosied

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

3 years ago

Just swiped “right” because I thought one of his hobbies said “crying” and I thought that was very vulnerable and respectable. Now I see it says “cycling” …. 🤦🏽‍♀️

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Last time I went to a yoga class the instructor said “strong practice!” at the end of our class, I felt so strong and so good! Tonight in our yoga class, shredded cheese fell out of my pockets. I am embracing this ebb and flow of my fitness journey.

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

Some days I feel like I’m a burden, no one really listens to me. Other days I wonder if I could be the leader of a cult. Today I think I could lead a cult that no one listens to.

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

Perspective: ‘Alpha Con’ showed me how to be an alpha ... by kicking me out deseret.com/2022/2/22/2294… via @DeseretNews

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Lisa_Cat @AertbyLisa

4 years ago

@EPrecipice I couldn’t resist, I loved the words so much. A glorious mix of wisdom and surrealism. I hope you don’t mind and many thanks for sharing.

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

With all the germs and sickness going around, I feel like it would also be helpful if we could ask for proof that you WASH YOUR HANDS!

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

Coworker: I had a nutritionist tell me that the average human has an average of 30 lbs of unprocessed waste in their intestine. Me: NO WAY!! 30 lbs!?? How is that even possible!?!? …. I think they’re full of shit. Laughed way too hard at my own joke. Again

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

Wondering if ever in the history of medical exams there has been one time the doctor/nurse said “Oh. Will you look at that! my hands and this stethoscope are perfectly room temperature!” Damn freezing hands every time!

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

Got the teen offspring a bunch of razors and an electric razor for Christmas. Him: All shaved. Nice and smooth! Me: Right on! Did you shave your butt crack!? Him: OHMUHGAWD! NO WAY! What!?? I’m a beginner! That’s like level 10 shaving!

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Al Yankovic @alyankovic

4 years ago

If you thought 2021 sucked, I’m afraid I’ve got some bad news for you…

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

Cried at work today. I was just trying to share my favorite moments from the new Spider-Man movie. Fucking nerd I might need a nap.

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

Feels so wrong to “like” someone’s status about their sobriety when I’m this buzzed… I AM STILL VERY PROUD OF YOU!

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

How To Build A Cool Shelf youtu.be/lPNFlpUVpog via @YouTube

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

“Feel like I judged him as a stereotypical dumb jock. He says a lot of dumb stuff. Then I found out he’s bilingual and I feel like that’s more intelligent than I was giving him credit for!” Rowdy (15yo Son) : I mean, you don’t know, he could be stupid in Spanish too.

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

Your body is AMAZING! Seriously so amazing. Like how on earth does it produce so much ear wax!?!?? AMAZING!! 😍

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Kristal @Hello_Kristal

4 years ago

Today someone said to me “You’re young and fit” Which made me think, I guess it depends on where you’re standing. Truly is about perspective. Also goes to show we should only let strangers put labels on us.