Jackie Martling @JackieMartling
dial (516) 922-WINE ! jokeland.com Bayville, Long Island NY Joined April 2008-
Tweets8K
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Followers49K
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Following2K
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Likes306
pothead to salesgirl: "I need toilet paper." "What color?" "Gimme white. I'll color it myself." * couple smoking weed at a drive-in movie, her: "Want to get in the back seat?" "Fuck no, I want to stay up here with you." @WillieNelson @HIGH_TIMES_Mag jokeland.com/audio
Willie Nelson’s done for pot .. what were we talking about?
Willie Nelson’s done for pot .. what were we talking about?
Southern gals suck dick & chew tobacco, know what to spit & what to swallow. * time to send a personalized video * they never fade away, packed with jokes your target can use forever @OpieRadio @AnthonyCumia @bertkreischer1 @UNCLEVINNIESCC @SoulJoels cameo.com/jackiemartling
please click! on the colorful JokeLand logo below to access the greatest dirty joke download deal of the century * 5 hours of rapid-fire foul jokes, $20!
please click! on the colorful JokeLand logo below to access the greatest dirty joke download deal of the century * 5 hours of rapid-fire foul jokes, $20!
into doctor's office as nun runs out screaming, him: "Doc, what's with the nun?" "Just told her she's pregnant." "The nun's *pregnant?*" "No, but it certainly cured her hiccups." * from bathroom stall: “Any paper on your side?” “No.” “Got 2 5's for a 10?" jokeland.com/audio
of all the hundreds of my favorite jokes I've posted that somehow managed to slip under the TikTok radar, how in tarnation (!) this one got by puzzles me the most. well over a million have watched. love to hear your review, drop a line, [email protected] tiktok.com/t/ZPRTGEdFV/
“Doc, can’t sleep, can’t take pills.” "I’ll put a sleeping pill in a suppository, take it anally.” next day: "Doc. it worked too good. I woke up with my finger in my asshole.” * sex with 3 women at the racetrack? a trifuckter. * send a wild personal video! cameo.com/jackiemartling
when'd you last dial (516) 922-WINE (516-922-9463)? jokes make you better company * my penis was in The Guiness Book of World Records, but then the librarian made me take it out. * a priest's teaching nun to swim, her: "Father, will I really sink if you take your finger out?"
7pm Thursday, May 23rd, "A Night of Inspiration" * Mulcahy's Pub, 3232 Railroad Ave., Wantagh NY * an event to celebrate "Mental Health Matters" @AnthonyCumia @OpieRadio @1023WBAB @MarkSimoneNY @Q1043 @GovsRadio @frankmackayhost @Newsday @SiriusXMComedy eventbrite.com/e/night-of-ins…
you very old Sternies .. every time I hear “eee-clipse” I think of “Eeee-Vincent Luggage,” one of the first K-Rock sponsors in 1986. the crazy days of Mrs. Roselli’s hairy back + Jan & Craig & Papa Bernie’s Window Factory @OpieRadio @AnthonyCumia @SIRIUSXM cameo.com/jackiemartling
why's a dog lick his ass? he knows in 5 minutes he's gonna be licking your face. * what would you call a female turtle? a clitortoise. * whittling with zipper open, almost cuts off dick, dick: "We've had a lot of fistfights, but I never thought you'd pull a *knife* on me."
start Spring with a few laughs * send a someone special a personal joke-packed video, contoured to your specific design * whatever you want in there, I got it * they'll have it forever @1023WBAB @Q1043 @OpieRadio @AnthonyCumia @MarkSimoneNY @bertkreischer1 cameo.com/jackiemartling
a great, great venue ..
a great, great venue ..
tonight! come on out! maybe nudity, maybe popcorn, but definitely laughs ..
tonight! come on out! maybe nudity, maybe popcorn, but definitely laughs ..
due to popular demand (and a flood of very creative insults), a very hot babe in a bikini will be trimming my eyebrows during the Q&A ..
11:40am today! I join old pal @MarkSimoneNY @710WOR *live!* with much funny jokes for your Holiday Weekend * we'll giggle about our organs, bodily functions, sex & everything that continues to disappoint us as we age @frankmackayhost @Newsday @friarsclub 710wor.iheart.com/featured/mark-…
do your kids like to tell jokes? I've got 2 terrific CD's of stuff just for them (seriously) (?). interested? drop me a line, [email protected] @OpieRadio @1023WBAB @frankmackayhost @MarkSimoneNY @AnthonyCumia @bluejeanfood @GoToWhitney @Q1043 @ComedyGovs soundcloud.com/jackiemartling…
please join me 8pm Friday night, April 5th, at The Boulton Center in Bay Shore, where I'll be screening the fun & funny documentary "Joke Man" * plus an anything-goes Q&A, some "Stump The Joke Man," and sex if you can talk someone into it. @wbab @OpieRadio soundcloud.com/jackiemartling…
Two bananas are lying on a riverbank when a turd comes floating by. The turd looks over at the two bananas and says, "Hey, fellas, come on in! The water's fine!" One banana turns to the other banana and says, "Do you believe that shit?" (516) 922-WINE ! soundcloud.com/jackiemartling…
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29K Followers 28 Following ... . .-.. ..-. -....- .- ... ... . -- -... .-.. .. -. --. / .. -. - . .-.. .-.. .. --. . -. -.-. . / ..-. .-. --- -- / - .... . / ..-. ..- - ..- .-. .
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Wow. Wow. Wow. 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼🔥🔥🔥
This is the most phenomenal political add I have ever seen. It doesn’t just apply to North Dakota, it applies to every town, city and State in America. Make it go viral.
Colorized video from 1906, where English children encounter a camera for the first time
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Merry Christmas from me, Denise, and the kids.
Why mass at midnight? The pries says two reasons: silence and darkness. Merry Christmas
I am sincerely wishing everyone Happy Everything! Merry Every-mas, Happy Hanukkah-mass, Quanzmass, and Happy Robonica! 😌😉 And thank you all—friends, fans and family for all the love! ❤️
My dad gave me advice when I was young: Family is everything. The tight-rope you walk is making sure family has enough while not becoming absorbed by career. Today is 40 years since we started that tightrope walk. Dad was right. Happy anniversary my love.
in honer of both Tom Ruegger and Andrea Romano getting inducted into the Silver Circle at the Childrens Emmy Awards, here's a moment from my favorite Pinky and the Brain segment from Animaniacs Congrats to both Tom and Andrea
Long Story Short: Willie Nelson 90 is out now! Order the 2CD+Blu-ray or 2xLP OR stream all 52 tracks now. Don’t forget to tune in THIS Sunday at 8:30pm ET on CBS/Paramount+ to relive this special event that took place LIVE at Hollywood Bowl! willienelson.lnk.to/Willie90
Happy Birthday to this Miserable Cub Scout. Hey Dad.
I always love getting to play with the Dave Diamond Band. Here are some highlights from Sundays gig! #giglife #livemusic #explore #afro #bellbottoms #jammin
In 1962, Pentagon and Warner Brothers released "Red Nightmare," to show what might happen to your family if dictatorship (of Communists) took over your small American town. Link (29 mins.): youtube.com/watch?v=of_eAp…
The Wall Street Journal rips Trump for skipping the debates: “Why is Mr. Trump afraid to confront other Republicans without the aid of a teleprompter? Is he worried he’d look his age at 77 next to younger candidates? To state the obvious, Mr. Trump is running to be President and…
🚨🚨🚨BREAKING: Gavin Newsom announces that California will become the FIRST state in the nation to officially propose an Amendment to the United States Constitution to end the nation’s gun violence crisis. California will offer four widely supported gun safety measures: 1)…
There are things we can do RIGHT NOW to solve the gun crisis. 👇 Will you sign the petition to tell the to ATF to CLOSE the gun show and online loopholes? We can save lives right now. bit.ly/sanegunlawsupp…
@realronniemarmo and @rickkogan chat on After Hours with Rick Kogan about our upcoming trip to North Shore Center in #Skokie and the love story that makes #Chicago hold a very special place in his heart! wgnradio.com/after-hours-wi…
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