Rando Thoughts @TotesRandom
Random thoughts, questions & dreams. We all have them, mine are just better... On the brain Joined December 2011-
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#thatawkwardmoment when its your birthday & you get all excited, but no one says anything... happy birthdayyy #sixteencandles
Thought about having kids... but then I thought...why would I voluntarily offer myself up to a parasite? #unlessitsanaccident #teenmom
why would anyone #textsanta? There is definitely no reception at the north pole.
#wheniwas13 I was scared of pregnant women. But they were just as scared of me...
Winning Fear Factor only means that youre dumb enough to eat elephant penis for $50K. Have some self respect, hold out for $55K.
Chris Brown's role in #stomptheyard is shorter than Columbus Short...
It's not that I don't want to have sex with you, it's that I don't want to see you naked.
The #greatestday was when I realized I was better than everyone else.
I wonder how tall @ConanOBrien would be if he shaved his head...
How is #thugs trending on twitter? Aint no real thug have a twitter... a real thug probably doesn't even have a smart phone or computer...
If you are ever in a fight, don't throw a punch. Step on their pinky toe & say "BITCH!".... no one is immune to that.
J Bechtle @JBechtle1
13 Followers 53 Following
Jesus Christ Edge Lor... @Jesus_M_Christ
291K Followers 733 Following You know who I am. If not, google me bitches. *PARODY* Donate to help solve the homeless crisis (Venmo: @ jesus-m-christ), 100% goes to @MiracleMessages 🙏🙏🙏
The Dark Lord @Lord_Voldemort7
1.3M Followers 0 Following Running around leaving scars, collecting my jar of hearts and tearing love apart...
The Ellen Show @TheEllenShow
71.7M Followers 24K Following The home for The Ellen DeGeneres Show on X. Enjoy the best moments from 19 incredible seasons!
Aziz Ansari @azizansari
9.2M Followers 0 Following #GoodFortune- Theaters Only. October 17. Hypothetical Tour- tickets on sale now. NOTE: Account run by social media person, Aziz not involved.
Chelsea Handler @chelseahandler
7.1M Followers 595 Following #LittleBigBitchTour on sale now | Listen to Dear Chelsea Season 4 | Revolution is streaming now on @netflix
Kathy Griffin @kathygriffin
1.8M Followers 1K Following @kathygriffin on TikTok, Instagram & YouTube. 2x Emmy & Grammy Award Winning Comedian. 2x Time NYT Bestselling Author. 23 specials. 1 feature film.
Kevin Hart @KevinHart4real
35.8M Followers 549 Following My name is Kevin Hart and I WORK HARD!!! That pretty much sums me up!!! Everybody Wants To Be Famous But Nobody Wants To Do The WorkTrends for United States
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