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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

The Young Man's Guide to Successful Living Joined June 2010
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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

13 years ago

FF @DirtyHaiku

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

13 years ago

You can't eat pride and glory doesn't pay the rent.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

"We have a deal; she does the cooking, I wash up ... Now we have a dishwasher, so I don't do anything."

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

Asking too many questions is worse than being wrong.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

If women had three boobs we'd get twice the boob squeezing done in 75% of the time.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

It perfectly OK to fuck "crazy" when you're single.

ಠ_ಠ retweeted
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Josh Payton @jpay

14 years ago

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

Following sports is like following politics for dumb guys.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

The ideals of Anarchism seem pretty good when you ignore the fact that most people are dicks.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

If you really want to put the fire back in your relationship, use Ben Gay as lube.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

This pickup line always works: "Wanna play Rape Fantasy?" "No!" "Eeehhxcellent."

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

Women love three things: men in kilts, Southern Comfort, and Chris Isaac's, Wicked Game.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

I don't know what it is about the human digestive system, but no matter what you give it, everything it makes looks like shit.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

"Why don't I shoot some jizzers into your gizzards?" #TerriblePickupLines

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

Invest in weird footwear. The weirdest shit always takes off big. Vibrams? Crocs? Uggs? Aquasocks? I rest my case.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

I don't always shit at work, but when I do, I use the handicapped stall.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

14 years ago

Bad planning on your part does not necessitate an emergency on my part.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

15 years ago

Don't attribute to malice what can be more easily explained by stupidity. For instance; 50% of the Republican party.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

15 years ago

There's no better way to impress a lady while camping than to shave your face with a fucking buck knife.

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ಠ_ಠ @YoungMansGuide

15 years ago

When you're pitching, they don't show the 300 strikes you threw. They show the one grand slam that lost the game.

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