Mickipedia @balloonimal
What do you call your act? San Diego, CA Joined February 2012-
Tweets398
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Followers53
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Following510
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Likes3K
This election has made me relapse. I'm back on twitter.
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Ok, so now they WANT me to sleep in Taco Bell? Make up your mind!
Doctors without borders are a bunch of complainers. Buy your books on Amazon like the rest of us!
@YuckyTom I don't know where it is, but "an poo". Please let me know if you find it.
They say to love yourself before you love others. That way you'll last longer.
@BuckyIsotope DONALD = 6 LETTERS JOHN TRUMP = 9 LETTERS DONALD J TRUMP = 69
I know I'm getting older because I can't tell which is the band name and which is the song title.
I thought a blood moon was when you show someone your hemorrhoids
A Facebook post with a screenshot of an Instagram post with a screenshot of a tweet is this era's version of re:re:fwd:re:fwd:fwd:re
@pennjillette's son-in-law @MindNoodler just liked my tweet!
These things suck. I'm going back to dude wipes.
My girlfriend is a biologist, but she's only doing it to pay for her pole dancing lessons.
I work for a deli counter. Why he counts delis, I don't know.
Chain restaurants only exist so that you have somewhere to eat when your dad visits
I think the key to a viral tweet is changing the name of anything to "_____ sauce" Windex = mirror sauce Gasoline = car sauce Tomato blood = spaghetti sauce
Have you noticed that since the government shutdown, there haven't been any chemtrails?
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Terri @Terri52093455
99 Followers 4K Following 😻🌧 I'm Тeггi!❣️ Hегe is mу album and my naked рics!)) Vоtе fог me, pleаse:💚 https://t.co/1GsEpRzsoB
Uncl Hamn Sharmall @uncl_hamn
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DecentlyFunny.com @DecentlyFunny
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Patrick Carr @patrickcarr_
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Conventional mattress... @MrMichaelRose
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That's Debatable! @DebatableComedy
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melinapolis @melinapolis
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Miss @hotmessmcgee
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inkycellist and frien... @Inkycellist
100 Followers 166 Following I've got no friends except my cello.
BTS @SoundsTravel
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PlanB @100trillionUSD
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Alexandria Ocasio-Cor... @AOC
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wintgenstein @drilosophers
20K Followers 194 Following "Shut da fuck up" —philosophy | philosopher := “public haver of takes” | I do all through @dril
kay @kaydargs
17K Followers 727 Following cotton candy photo gal • ig: @kaydargs • contact / prints / presets in link 🍬
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Pitch @pitchjokes
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Artist Samuelancestor... @samuelancestor
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160K Followers 500 Following If I can make one person laugh, I’m doing a pretty shitty job.
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Alita: Battle Angel s... @punished_picnic
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archived tweets! @EOArchive
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adam crouch @theadamcrouch
7K Followers 942 Following walk without rhythm and it won’t attract the worm.
Andrew Kolb @kolbisneat
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