SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

I own over 100 pairs of shoes. But I still only wear my classic black and white @Vans every day of my life. The slip on’s or the laces, depending on my mood.

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

10 months ago

If I get 1 like, then @elonmusk has to bless me with a gift of $100.00. Don’t be greedy folks.

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

10 months ago

#CEO

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

10 months ago

McDonald’s fries are overrated. Instead of disagreeing and arguing with me, ask yourself why you have shitty standards.

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

10 months ago

Hey @JoeListComedy can I open for you?

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

10 months ago

I think the most important question to be asking right now is this: What did the shooter order at Starbucks before he shot the CEO? I can’t keep ordering “Whatever the CEO shooter got”.

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

10 months ago

I have unsubscribed to @jimmyjohns emails approximately 40 times and they still send me emails all the damn time. No means no!

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

11 months ago

Hey @netflix, @ufc isn’t buffering even with Bruce buffer.

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

11 months ago

How many of you are canceling your #netflix accounts after this bs?

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

11 months ago

Watching Mike Tyson fight like it’s the 90’s… meaning, Netflix is graining af, like my tv in the 90’s.

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SkinnyDipDavid @davidcraigbates

11 months ago

Now booking for 2025! If you’re a comedy booker, or producer, and you need a comedian, please don’t hesitate to reach out. Let’s work together. Or if you have any leads, let me know! And lastly, please share this! Thanks!!