Brandon Martin-Moore @BrandonMartinM2
I know things I shouldn't. No, not *those* things, it just means I'm occasionally good at quizzes. But maybe from the madness, something beautiful will grow youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ By the fountain down the road. Joined August 2018-
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Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
I guess it feels very Simpsons for this joke to still be accurate by a 4 day margin
I guess it feels very Simpsons for this joke to still be accurate by a 4 day margin https://t.co/FlbHGriq7O
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The essentials, how could I forget?
I cannot stand "I demand to speak to the manager" or "don't you know who I am?" types. Just had to leave a queue so I didn't burst into uncontrollable laughter in front of one of those.
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
You have to hand it to those skinny, wiry guys—they're stronger than they look. (1968)
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
local election literature never fails
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
There would be an inordinate amount of unpleasantness and suffering avoided if 2025 folk could understand the difference between: I like this! and Everyone HAS to love this!
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
🚨🕒 REMINDER: The Government will test the Emergency Alert system at 3pm today making your device exert a shrill, unpleasant noise. You have been warned.
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
There’s a diversion through my seaside village On closer inspection all the arrows spin on a central bolt 🤔 The temptation is STRONG to spin the arrows to create a scene from a Mack Sennett movie or Wile E Coyote cartoon
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
We are here on Earth to fart around. Don't let anybody tell you any different. KURT VONNEGUT
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
The map aliens in Doctor Who use
The map aliens in Doctor Who use
It's the me vs @braintree_ derby today, fingers crossed but honestly anything could happen. I'll only be following the result through an unreliable 4G signal
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
Dick Van Duijn captured the exact moment a squirrel stopped to smell a flower
A department store has scored for Boston
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
I love how the headline suggests the kids were just being wimps. It's like the headline was written by Dylan
I love how the headline suggests the kids were just being wimps. It's like the headline was written by Dylan https://t.co/csGFKjkRhv
I like it
I like it https://t.co/HuAkjjvHyl
Aargh!
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
What if he flubbed Emma Mackey’s name in front of her and was too embarrassed to admit it so instead tried to pass it off as the name of a character he wanted her to play and now well here we are
What if he flubbed Emma Mackey’s name in front of her and was too embarrassed to admit it so instead tried to pass it off as the name of a character he wanted her to play and now well here we are
I'll take any opportunity to make fun of Rude, by Magic x.com/MattZeitlin/st…
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
james bond: the name's bond barista: ok james bond: james bond barista: well I've written bond now james bond: well it's james really barista: shall I get a new cup james bond: no barista: I can james bond: it's fine
Brandon Martin-Moore retweeted
“Why do you have 60,000 photos in your camera roll?” I thought the luggage cart matching the carpet at the Travelodge was charming and worth remembering forever
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