khaki ©️ @DialHandSoap
I’m sorry if you don’t think I’m funny but that sounds like a personal problem Joined November 2014-
Tweets19K
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Followers332
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Following237
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Likes22K
khaki ©️ retweeted
walking around with a woman who’s hotter than u rules. everyone looks at u like ur a dog dragging a giant tree branch. like aww he’s having fun. but he definitely can’t take that home
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khaki ©️ retweeted
Okay this made me chuckle IRL
khaki ©️ retweeted
The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life
khaki ©️ retweeted
kissing someone passionately in a dive bar is one of the few joys we still have left
khaki ©️ retweeted
Things men don't understand.
khaki ©️ retweeted
ducked the opps but at what cost😭
khaki ©️ retweeted
I'd like to apologize to the tranwoman I migendered yeterday. A you can ee, thi key broke off my keyboard, cauing a "he" by mitake. I know that' not an excue, and I'm orry for migendering him.
khaki ©️ retweeted
khaki ©️ retweeted
Will be trying this in the local FB groups next, wish me luck!
Never getting over this one
Never getting over this one https://t.co/5V7DgRNZXw
khaki ©️ retweeted
now the fast & furious movies never gonna end
now the fast & furious movies never gonna end
khaki ©️ retweeted
and when i’m president, the $100 bikini top & $100 bottom combo will be banned.
khaki ©️ retweeted
NFL games shouldn't start at 10pm.
khaki ©️ retweeted
Sorry I have to share this image from a party I went to last night
khaki ©️ retweeted
Those teams were the Bengals, Lions, Ravens, and Colts. They went 4-0 today.
Those teams were the Bengals, Lions, Ravens, and Colts. They went 4-0 today.
khaki ©️ retweeted
Uhhh… natural energy… yes.
khaki ©️ retweeted
I ain’t never did no ugly shit like that
khaki ©️ retweeted
luigi’s “deny, defend, depose” bullets were good but “haha your gay” is also an undeniable message
khaki ©️ retweeted
I’ve never met a medical receptionist that I believed wanted me to live
khaki ©️ retweeted
I love beating a dead horse with the girls. There is nothing better than a Saturday night rehashing and never letting that horse rest in peace
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