Kristian @Kingsroc
I will use Twitter however I like and no lawyer on earth may stop me. The moon. Joined September 2010-
Tweets9K
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Followers2K
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Following455
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Likes16K
@thomas_violence plz more of this specifically.
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Kristian retweeted
[losing badly in a contest] guys its not a contest
@erica_rosie Someone needs to tell it like it is.
*looks outside to notice the robot uprising has begun* Finally. *sweeps paperwork into the trash can*
I saw a dead bird and my first instinct was to have a bird funeral because apparently my inner child is a 13 year old goth.
Probably a pretty lenient Dad all around. Just lets you do whatever the hell I bet.
*the pharmacist hands me a full bottle of Xanax and we hi-five*
Don't worry baby. I'm not like the other guys. *opens shirt to reveal a mass of wriggling snakes*
Soft shell crabs need to be tougher. Emotionally I mean. Stop crying Kevin it was just a joke.
Dating seems to be mostly doing embarrassing things and hoping the other person likes you enough not to care.
2016: Trump will never be president. 2045: they can't re-elect robot trump. Never gonna happen. 2100: can I get some Trump on my trump
You know what they say about guys with big feet. If you take a picture of them in the woods it will be really blurry.
It's not so weird to sit in your car right? Like that's pretty normal. I thought so too but a LOT of deer have started to surround my car.
Kristian retweeted
The dude who writes Dilbert believes that there will be a "race war" and that when that happens he will be a "top ten assassination target"
*sticks head under water* do not email me or my son ever again.
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