I will pay you any amount of $ to fight a cop @NotBadSantaBoy
clearly a SoundCloud rapper. Joined July 2012-
Tweets3K
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Followers311
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Likes1K
@mrmistyeyed_21 Damnnnnn who’s this hottie???
@bridgetehurley Proud of you queen
@NaraaIzabel You betcha it’s real
@NaraaIzabel Well I’ll be a monkeys uncle
@NaraaIzabel “We needed this” after doing something a little fun with their family/friends
@NaraaIzabel I’ll tell you one thing…
Boy oh boy I’m so glad the pizza place gave me two plates with my calzone because I am for sure sharing it. You don’t know them but I am definitely sharing this calzone
Planes are truly wild. We are able to defy god, traveling 30,000 feet in the air and you can even take a shit after drinking five little bottles of wine. Astounding.
It’s really all about mindset. While you poor people argue about silly things like “minimum wage” or “healthcare” I bought 2 packs of hot dogs with the third one being free. I am simply built different.
I’m at a family reunion and just saw someone put ketchup on their salad. Will someone please adopt me
A cop came into my job and ordered a Cobb salad no bacon. At least they aren’t cannibals I guess
The roughest part of breakups is always when they change the Netflix password
Happy pride month to everyone in the LGBTQ+community and also to @GuyFieri
@StefaBro Thank you King
@realpenina Proud of you
Y’all I started catching feeling for someone who collects gemstones and reads tarot cards. Pray for me.
Last night I was having *relations* with someone and I started to get a cramp. She quickly ran to the kitchen and brought me back a banana and now I think I’m in love
Shout out to the person at the laundromat who brought their dirty clothes in a Gucci suitcase. Stay safe ily
Danielle Kreamer @DKreamerr
407 Followers 305 Following Don't know where I'm going but I'll get there eventually. Washington sports are my life so don’t worry I’m used to being disappointed.
Collin Baker @CollinBaker
691 Followers 2K Following Los Angeles-based writer & stand-up from Maryland. // BLACK LIVES MATTER // he/him // please listen to @bonghitspod
Donnie Sengstack @donsengstack
2K Followers 821 Following Magooby's Joke House New Comedian of the Year 2015
Uh...Somebody Else? @TheSkullBase
1K Followers 1K Following Podcasts, standup, micro budget film auteur, writer, renaissance man, adult scamp
Katie Arroyo @KatieGArroyo
2K Followers 3K Following Comic. Tell ME a joke! Co-host of Wicked Funny Podcast and @pinkypromisepod , (and now I'm a twitch streamer??)
Mr. Couch @IanSalyers
479 Followers 599 Following Comedian. Fake-smart. I write jokes. Baltimore based.
Throat goat💦💦�... @throatgoatjess
42 Followers 155 Following Spicy 💦🍆🔥 let me drain your balls in my mouth payment first ‼️‼️ let me make Your fantasies come true 💦💦
Mpumelelo Simelane @MpumeleloSime11
0 Followers 103 Following
Academic Professional... @AcademicProfe12
130 Followers 457 Following We are proficient academic writers with good research, analyzing, inerpretation and writing skills. Dm/Email: [email protected]
Greek Boy @str8boygreece
162 Followers 4K Following Str8 boy from Greece Mykonos now - name : mariano 🇮🇹🇪🇸 🇬🇷
Beula Carbajal @BeulaCarbajal
236 Followers 4K Following One of the chicks you’ll never see so enjoy the hot pics 😏 dm for FREE private pics
Scarlet love @Scarlet44067058
292 Followers 4K Following Hotwife/Wet Sexy Teen 🍆 allowed to do as she feels! . 21+ only 💦
Hannah Kendal @gentnigsvibi
18 Followers 239 Following • Lеwd woman • Sееking 18+ adventures 😘 • Write me оn nickname: hannаhkеndal785 ↘↘↘
Keith Tozer @KeithMode81
340 Followers 381 Following Comedian | Producer | Showrunner | Very Part-Time Life Haver.... | Basically a Clevelander |
Chloé Cunha @ChloeCunha
4K Followers 2K Following Comedian, writer, & actor (but only if it's gay) 🏳️🌈 headline contrib @TheOnion @Reductress @AwfMag, @plottwistmag Vespa @thepenumbrapod, Melody @STP_Podcast
eater of gods @_thotmaster
134 Followers 288 Following FREE PALESTINE // 18+// Freddie // 26 // non-binary trans-masc, he/him // professional horn dog, recreational juggalo
Danny Rathbun @DannyRathbun
927 Followers 2K Following Stand up comedian, writer, third most handsome comedian in the tri-state area
2MuchBread @2MBStudios
1K Followers 3K Following The home to some of the funniest people on Twitch. Join us for a laugh, you've earned it. Produced by @iamBeniam, @Captain_Fear, & @rajandelman.
clam strip @ol_snake_arms
58 Followers 365 Following professional idiot, terrible asshole improving daily.
The Don Smallwood �... @PinkyringDon
80 Followers 318 Following I'm only here to show you what you've been missing... everything else is Fugazi.
Sophia Florence (Swol... @AllanaSmithee
2K Followers 4K Following Engineer, mathematician, comedian, screenwriter, never antisocial, always socialist, always antifascist. Co-host of @theCrumblingpod
rosegangthelabel @rosegang631
5 Followers 55 Following Independent Record Label • Artists • Audio Engineer • Song Writers DM for Mixing & Mastering ($40) be Cashapp or Venmo Ready
August |-/ @mrmistyeyed_21
374 Followers 878 Following • 29 • Your fairly local emo • Tattoo Apprentice • Clique Artist • Artøpia 2017 • IG: lavender_wings
pratima @pratatat_xo
426 Followers 1K Following Show me your Atman and I’ll show you mine. she/her 🇬🇾🕉♎️ #DalitLivesMatter #BlackLivesMatter
19/51 BeatZ @19Beatz
109 Followers 901 Following 🎸 Music Producer/Beat Maker 📧 [email protected] (Mix & Mastering) 🎵 50 BEATZ PACK FREE DOWNLOAD in bio ⬇️ 👇 ⬇️
Eric Benoit @RexBenoit14
207 Followers 215 Following
Bri_Hiltz @brii_ality
32 Followers 53 Following
Muffin Trash 💀 @justsarahmartin
7K Followers 456 Following Garbage New Englander. A drag queen called me a badass bitch, I will run with that compliment till I die. JustSarahMartin.com-------- Website TV/Movie shit👇
Joyce Meyer @JoyceMe38401086
27 Followers 173 Following am a Honest,Kind,Caring,Loyal ,truthful and God fearing Person, I am not here for any stupid games But I am Looking for a serious and Long term relationship.
Graveyard Goonz @graveyardgoonz
169 Followers 1K Following Occult Obsessed Couple who LIVE Prank Call people from a Graveyard every Wednesday @8pm EST
Danny Rats 🐀 @YoDannyRats
1K Followers 513 Following I MAKE BEER AND MUSIC AND GRAFFITI AND TAKE PICTURES OF BIRDS AHHHH Avatar made by THE MAGNIFICENT @Merop_Art
Mary @Mary65273963
0 Followers 34 Following Easy going and ready to meet new people Hate scary films
Mandi @Mamzypop
629 Followers 917 Following Artist. Hairstylist. Comedian. Science Nerd. History Lover.
Comix Roadhouse @ComixRoadhouse
5K Followers 2K Following 🍴 Roadhouse Restaurant + Craft Beer Bar 🎤 Live Music Every Weekend + Karaoke on Thursday 🎭 Standup Comedy 🐂 Bull Riding, Beer Pong + Dancing
Michelle Burns @Shelbybaby225
20 Followers 474 Following 30💙🖤 ~normal people have no idea how beautiful the darkness is~
EddieLiles D Comic @EddieLilesDC
424 Followers 585 Following DC based comedian, producer and Father of one. Host of the popular podcast Ima Get In Trouble
Eddie The Axe🪓 @eddietheaxe
2K Followers 852 Following Made mostly of metal. Host of The Bloodybits Horror Show, and Ed and Matt on Campus. Your favorite podcasters favorite podcaster.
Daniel Kalwhite @Dannyboy3030
1K Followers 1K Following Stand Up Comic. Too crazy for Boys Town, too much of a boy for Crazy Town.
big honkin caboose @itsbighonkin
102K Followers 990 Following professional cutie + my comedy special Don’t Sleep With Comedians is on YouTube 💖 🪩✨ $50 dm fee
Danielle Kreamer @DKreamerr
407 Followers 305 Following Don't know where I'm going but I'll get there eventually. Washington sports are my life so don’t worry I’m used to being disappointed.
Collin Baker @CollinBaker
691 Followers 2K Following Los Angeles-based writer & stand-up from Maryland. // BLACK LIVES MATTER // he/him // please listen to @bonghitspod
Donnie Sengstack @donsengstack
2K Followers 821 Following Magooby's Joke House New Comedian of the Year 2015
Uh...Somebody Else? @TheSkullBase
1K Followers 1K Following Podcasts, standup, micro budget film auteur, writer, renaissance man, adult scamp
Katie Arroyo @KatieGArroyo
2K Followers 3K Following Comic. Tell ME a joke! Co-host of Wicked Funny Podcast and @pinkypromisepod , (and now I'm a twitch streamer??)
Mr. Couch @IanSalyers
479 Followers 599 Following Comedian. Fake-smart. I write jokes. Baltimore based.
🦭CARMAXLLA🦭 @carmaxlla
18K Followers 3 Following CARMAXLLIANS ONLY!!!! TW: ⚠️illiterate⚠️ find me on twitch @ carmaxlla
bluerobyn69.bsky.soci... @bluerobyn69
237 Followers 395 Following 28 🔞 minors dni 🔞 ca$h@pp: $bluerobyn69 📷 icon from picrew @makowwka
Eric Benoit @RexBenoit14
207 Followers 215 Following
Chloé Cunha @ChloeCunha
4K Followers 2K Following Comedian, writer, & actor (but only if it's gay) 🏳️🌈 headline contrib @TheOnion @Reductress @AwfMag, @plottwistmag Vespa @thepenumbrapod, Melody @STP_Podcast
eater of gods @_thotmaster
134 Followers 288 Following FREE PALESTINE // 18+// Freddie // 26 // non-binary trans-masc, he/him // professional horn dog, recreational juggalo
Haley OC @MILFWEEED
63K Followers 761 Following i like doing comedy, acting, writing and educating about/ingesting weed
clam strip @ol_snake_arms
58 Followers 365 Following professional idiot, terrible asshole improving daily.
Cherri Chaos💥 @XxxCherri
212 Followers 118 Following ! Fully vaccinated ! • Cumslut Vixen / Findom • #MFC : Cherri_xxx • Cashapp : $SpitefulSpider • 5ft 3, 110lbs •
Go Left US @GoLeftUS
60K Followers 7K Following Pushing the US left by uplifting left-wing voices, cultivating left-wing communities, and fighting for candidates that best represent our values. Also, memes.
Mike Prysner @MikePrysner
103K Followers 5K Following Executive Director of the Center on Conscience & War (@CCW4COs) / Filmmaker at @empirefiles / 🎣
CT Dept. of Labor @CTDOL
5K Followers 2K Following Follow @CTDOL (or @CTHires) on Instagram and LinkedIn. CTDOL is not active on X.
K Trevor Wilson @KTrevorWilson
62K Followers 2K Following Stand-up comedian and actor from Canada. Self-proclaimed “Man Mountain of Comedy” also I play Squirrely Dan on Letterkenny. [email protected] for bookings
Tom Morello @tmorello
889K Followers 126 Following Feed the poor. Fight the power. Rock the f*ck out. Tickets Here ⬇️ https://t.co/zMc2Ab3k7O
ICE T @FINALLEVEL
1.8M Followers 2K Following ‘FOR MATURE AUDIENCES’ ICE T Leader of BODYCOUNT & The FINAL LEVEL TWITTER GANG.#FLTG Author,MC & Actor @ICET on Instagram Oh yeah..I got a couple a GRAMMYS 💎
Tim Dillon @TimJDillon
957K Followers 621 Following Stand up comic. CEO of Fake Business. Podcast: The Tim Dillon Show. LIVE/MERCH LINK ⬇️
Sophia Florence (Swol... @AllanaSmithee
2K Followers 4K Following Engineer, mathematician, comedian, screenwriter, never antisocial, always socialist, always antifascist. Co-host of @theCrumblingpod
August |-/ @mrmistyeyed_21
374 Followers 878 Following • 29 • Your fairly local emo • Tattoo Apprentice • Clique Artist • Artøpia 2017 • IG: lavender_wings
your sad aunt Carol @MichaelCFurr
724 Followers 1K Following Stand-up comic, director, he/homo. Watch my specials 'Straight Acting' and 'I Didn't Die' on Amazon prime video or listen on Spotify, iTunes, etc
Tom Segura AKA Mr. La... @tomsegura
940K Followers 1K Following I have 4 specials on Netflix. podcast here: https://t.co/4uUwz2QOkf You can Merch up here: https://t.co/KaSVm44S8A
pratima @pratatat_xo
426 Followers 1K Following Show me your Atman and I’ll show you mine. she/her 🇬🇾🕉♎️ #DalitLivesMatter #BlackLivesMatter
Dan Wickes @dan_wickes
11K Followers 2K Following NYC standup. Winner of the 2021 Coney Island Comedy Festival. Check out Roast Battle League NY. he/him
Muffin Trash 💀 @justsarahmartin
7K Followers 456 Following Garbage New Englander. A drag queen called me a badass bitch, I will run with that compliment till I die. JustSarahMartin.com-------- Website TV/Movie shit👇
Lamar Jackson @Lj_era8
1.5M Followers 458 Following Business Inquiries - [email protected] @forever8dreamer @LJwrites2 @era8apparel @Lamarjacksonent @playactionsoul
Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump
111.8M Followers 53 Following 45th & 47th President of the United States of America🇺🇸
Daniel @tinymediaempire
27K Followers 33 Following Executive Producer of The Haunting of Skeleton Town for Netflix
Chef Reba #taters #pr... @reba38
1K Followers 209 Following I'm born & raised in Texas, simple country girl, who made it into the top 20 of masterchef, loves family and friends and a good ol fashion country get together
Graveyard Goonz @graveyardgoonz
169 Followers 1K Following Occult Obsessed Couple who LIVE Prank Call people from a Graveyard every Wednesday @8pm EST
Danny Rats 🐀 @YoDannyRats
1K Followers 513 Following I MAKE BEER AND MUSIC AND GRAFFITI AND TAKE PICTURES OF BIRDS AHHHH Avatar made by THE MAGNIFICENT @Merop_Art
Bob Gurnett - bobgurn... @BobIsntFunny
7K Followers 1K Following Comedian. NBA Free Agent. Moron. For booking: [email protected]
Tig Notaro @TigNotaro
163K Followers 5K Following Official Twitter for Tig Notaro. **TWEETS NOT BY TIG** but by Tig's friends, friends of friends, & charities we love. Tour dates on https://t.co/S3AGRPJkuZ
Teller @MrTeller
335K Followers 41 Following





























