Rob Ryan @NotRobRyan
The Dallas Fucking Cowboys defensive coordinator. Son of Buddy Ryan, Twin brother of Rex Ryan. Dallas, Texas Joined January 2011-
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Followers77
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Following29
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So I just filed for unemployment.. This is going to put a big damper on my drugs, sex, and booze for a while. Thanks #NFLlockoutjobs.
So I'm back after about a month of hanging at the @charliesheen estate..I guess he got tired of seeing my fatass on the couch. #Winning
Rob Ryan retweeted
@NotWesWelker or santa clauss RT @NotRobRyan White Fat Albert #NFLlockoutjobs
@NotMikeS Yes one of them was your wife. Her vagina reminded me of that big ass gap in your teeth.
I have the best wife ever, I came home to 2 hookers waiting on me in my bed. That was the best valentines day present I have ever recieved!
I just walked into Jerry Jones' office and caught him masterbaiting again.. I atleast lock my door when I have to rub one out. #truestory
“@NotMikeS: @NotRobRyan has Rex ever woke you up playing with your feet?” Yes all the time, I would wake up with my toenails painted & shit.
There will be alot of tops popped and panties dropped all over the world today. I fucking love #Superbowl Sunday!
I'm currently letting Big Ben use my office here at the statium to bang a Green Bay cheerleader.
I don't even call it a hangover anymore.. I just call it waking up. #Fact
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128 Followers 49 Following I'm the true real deal thrilla coming for you like a killa. Won't stop ballin' til the QB be fallin.
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JHort @HortyHort
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Jacoby Ellsbury @DoucheEllsbury
215 Followers 471 Following Im the sexiest lead off man alive. Gonzo is a 150 million dollar man, and I have more homeruns....shit they better sign me to a Crawford deal.
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162 Followers 110 Following I am the 2nd best WR in the NFL - right after my father @DoucheRandyMoss. Proud member of Team Douche. Not the real Dez Bryant.
Arthritis Rhodes @ArthritisRhodes
63 Followers 116 Following Listen, I'm an outta work muhfukkin World Series champion. Fukkin CHAMP, I tell ya. If Mozeliak don't sign me soon I be finna bussa cap in some bitches.
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Dez Bryant @SmugDezBryant
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Jimmy Clausen @notjimmyclausen
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John Elway @FakeJohnElway
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Sam Lackey @StrengthSam40
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Tiger Woods @FauxTigerWoods
785 Followers 110 Following Just trying to get the ball in the hole...the golf ball...yeah that one (yes, this is parody)
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