cale harper @calethoughts
writer @themysteryhour | award-losing comedian | a fresh mellow cabbage flavor Washington, DC Joined January 2018-
Tweets237
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Followers138
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Following445
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Likes6K
Jesus at the Last Supper:
Every friend group needs that one evil traitor
My haters are forming an encampment at my alma mater demanding I divest from my swag
Going “Crayola Mode” (eating a box of crayons)
Damn girl, are you a girl? Because I’m scared of you
What if we kissed under the light of the Shinzo Abe assassination footage
To me, the grind is when I take a few minutes to watch and react to the 40+ TikToks my friends send me each day
I found a grimace pilfering through the dumpster at my apartment complex
Billion Dollar Baby fight please 🤞🏻
Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg agree to hold cage fight bbc.in/43SLXkE
@alpacapresident This is a day 8 of unemployment activity for sure
Day 5 of unemployment: I’ve obtained two CDs of unknown origin from the woods behind my pharmacy. I fear they may be damaged beyond function. Will you join me in my pledge to preserve the relics of our culture?
Day 6 of unemployment: I received a haircut from an Italian man who smelled of pine and hot newspaper. He shorn me with the skill of a Chilean shepherd. Will you join me in celebrating our multicultural society?
Day 4 of unemployment: I have completed my pilgrimage to Grimace’s ancestral homeland, as is my birthright. This is his body, broken for us. Will you join me in tasting the milk of The Purple One?
June 6, 1944: Allied forces storm the beaches at Normandy June 6, 2023: Baby Gronk stole Livvy from the Drip King
She Livvy on my Baby Gronk til I Drip King
cale harper retweeted
Succession but it's Sam Raimi's Spider-Man trilogy.
Unfortunately for the haters I have a beautiful mind
The NFL has no business drafting more players. There’s enough
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clown college graduat... @everelle17
407 Followers 332 Following live fast die clown | sorry that I went to mo state | she/they | 27
ちぃたん☆／Chi... @chiitan7407
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