Favstar.fm 250★'s @Favstar250
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Pablo Picasso was once arrested in connection with the theft of the Mona Lisa.
[Courtroom] Judge: You set fire to his car. How do you plead? Atty: Not guilty by reason of insanity. Judge: *raises one eyebrow* Me: *points to red hair* It's out of my control. Judge: Case dismissed!
boss: I'm sorry Alan we're going to have to let you go bungee cord tester: N O O o o ᵒ
“Today we rebuild.” -Parents everywhere cleaning up the day after Christmas.
When we played this quiz in the studio before the recording of tonight's show, Simon was the only audience member to get every question right and was crowned The Cleverest Person In The Room. Congratulations Simon!
One time during a basketball game my coach yelled TOZER WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU I yelled MY FATHER IS ON A DOWNWARD SPIRAL AND MY MOM TRIES TO MAKE US FEEL BETTER BY TAKING US TO MCDONALD'S
I owe myself two apologies for every time I said sorry for the way I felt.
If you tell me your kid is 5 years old, I will continue to think he is 5 years old for the next seven years.
Thought for the day thepoke.co.uk/2017/01/15/tho…
I’m ready for that long winter’s nap I’ve heard so much about.
Invented in 1862, the anti-garrotting cravat shot spikes into the hands of anyone attempting to strangle the wearer.
Still haunted by Macklemore's threat to wear my grandfather's clothes
Hiring manager: so what are your strengths? Me:
Other media: BREAKING NEWS NDTV: HEART-BREAKING NEWS
Relaxing on footpath and then someone tells you its Bhai’s birthday so he may party late... #HappyBirthdaySalmanKhan
IDC IF NOBODY KNOWS WHAT THIS TWEET MEANS BUT ITS TRUE
[snowflake /crime scene]
"Alexa, take down the Christmas decorations."
Serher @Serher761785
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A Horse Named Cold Ai... @horse_named
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Snob_Architect (@snob... @Snob_Architect
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Pieijirt @Pieijirt659485
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Thick Vanilla Milksha... @zaltanamm
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carlacaracol@hotmail.... @QueenMateArg
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JOSH GATES @Joshgates721
30 Followers 1K Following https://t.co/wFLfqOp90e of #Expendition unknown New private handle to connect with my fans! If you're a fan, feel free to send a message—I'd love to hear from you
Official Trish YearWo... @trishayearwo99
136 Followers 2K Following I ❤️ music, family, food, coffee & dogs! My new album "The Mirror" is out now
Bud McCullough @BudMccullo74675
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Joseph Maxwell @_bodill
477 Followers 7K Following I’m a $202 mega million lottery winner in Edison,NJ I’m so blessed so I’ll be giving away $5000 to my first 5k followers 💯 Grateful & blessed!🙏
Father of srk hater @manav20045
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Der Seher™ @Der_Seher
1K Followers 27 Following I'm the light in the darkness - official account ™ no parody ! no fake ! -
Jared Goth @black_hockdown
129 Followers 2K Following Legions of Turbo Manlets will fall like an ocean on this Denny's
Ksbba Corr @CorrKsbba66983
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Sid Roth TV @Gsidrothtv
1K Followers 7K Following Experience the supernatural! Discover greater intimacy with God. Official Twitter of Sid Roth's It's Supernatural! Tap link below for more
Madon Corr @CorrMadon86578
37 Followers 8K Following
cardiologue「心臓�... @chi_no_usagi
2K Followers 7K Following • 18 • aspiring premed student • ur fav future cardiologist ! ﮩ٨ـﮩ• Dx Primary malignant HTN + HHD + IHD + Prog. Cog. Impair • ... ♡
Ebrima Jatta @EbrimaJatt49296
18 Followers 922 Following Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
!!! @cherbackup_01
618 Followers 7K Following True happiness lies in the little things Nature is king
Thelonious Monk 👽�... @yessirwhattever
298 Followers 3K Following alt: @POTUS52Archive 🫐🪱🇵🇸🇺🇦 #letemknow #guardsball #dawgpound #GoBucks #GoSpursGo #ChargeOn RIP D.H Peligro 🕊️🕊️ sussed at 1.2 Million
poop brother (kris) @fartfromabut
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Kim Dotcom ✪ @_KIM_DOT_COM_
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JULIE GREEN MINISTRIE... @juliegreen7423
551 Followers 756 Following Julie green ministries exists to transform lives through God’s unconditional love,his word,and the hope that comes from a personal relationship with him
Val Kilmer @drealvalkilmer
196 Followers 4K Following Official Twitter for Val Kilmer. For art https://t.co/722DTNQy78 For more fun: https://t.co/YzKXGFvber / @kampkilmer https://t.co/V3FPgoixEV
Pippa Gumbel @GumbelPipp48527
622 Followers 8K Following wife of @nicky.gumbel pioneers of the @alphacourse Together we write a daily Bible commentary #BOY
Dalton Brewer @brewerdalty
201 Followers 1K Following All-in $TSLA Investor⚡️, crypto, SpaceX 🚀Student of Life📚 Optimistic Futurist🔮 Tesla News & Content. SECONDARY ACCOUNT FOR DMs 📨
Blixinator @blixinatorblt
10 Followers 107 Following 18+ alt .hello asexual freakposting . by the way I sometimes do draw the Porn and i write nsfw fics so. IF I FOLLWO A MINOR ITS AN ACCODENT IM SORRY
Mattt Redman @MatttRedma23179
412 Followers 7K Following Husband, Father, Songwriter. @ UK @ https://t.co/9dBgGk8wY7...
mrtankman5000 @tankmancool
566 Followers 3K Following @mrtankman5000 i speak both english and spanish 🇭🇳🇺🇸
multifandom hellscape... @MFHellscapes
66 Followers 1K Following @ajhalili2006 from the multifandom multiverse | 19 | Check pinned for deets | More shitposts: @FromTheBSHQ | Cover pic: @GildedguyArt Story 4
塔可塔可塔 @rinkost4r_
37 Followers 835 Following =rinko/小伊 中文Eng but my English sucks thank you very much🤲🏻🩷跑路到@desiringway0119
SpecialKimtamine™ �... @LorazeKim
3K Followers 2K Following Villianous. Sword swallowing champion. Cancer Warrior. Trophy wife. Whisky. Pill popper. FAFO. Flirty. GenX. Rude motherfucker. 🚫DM 🔞 #FuckCancer
Julian @JorgeOsorn13899
25 Followers 810 Following
Courtney Phillips @CourtneyPh32534
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Nonieto Omila @NonietoOmi83731
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Jesgate Ondown @one3dsoul
2K Followers 5K Following PROMO FOR INNOVATIVE ARTISTS WHO USE LYRICS CREATIVELY TO RELATE THEIR PERSONAL STORIES FOR CATHARSIS AND TO SPARK CULTURAL SENTIENCE THROUGH HIP HOP ! ( ♀ )
Mohawk @MohawkRemix
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Marnix Baert @BaertMarnix
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KISS DAN BERL @kissdanberl
1K Followers 5K Following The Official Twitter Account of Daniel Berlin Kissiedu. Administrative Manager, Human Resource Professional, Teacher, Writer, Entrepreneur.
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