flying machete @cmidds

life’s crazy, lotta smells Joined July 2019

Tweets

51
Followers

46
Following

75
Likes

6K

flying machete @cmidds

4 years ago

My super is the coolest man I have ever seen, I just saw him taking out the trash for all the units smoking a cig wearing a tshirt and shorts in 40 degree weather

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flying machete @cmidds

4 years ago

Deepfakes are actually great, now you can just say or do anything and if somebody records you, you can say it’s a deepfake. “I got hacked” on steroids

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flying machete @cmidds

4 years ago

Flight attendants should not be able to perform jokes, captive audience has no choice but to laugh

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flying machete @cmidds

4 years ago

@SouthwestAir is a great airline, when you’re waiting in line u can just cut and nobody cares

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flying machete @cmidds

4 years ago

@SouthwestAir is an amazing airline, u can just cut in line and nobody cares

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flying machete @cmidds

4 years ago

@rachellapides Is using a fork to eat soup next?

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flying machete @cmidds

4 years ago

Dad fucked up the peach cobbler

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flying machete @cmidds

4 years ago

Standing in line at an airport at 3:40 am waiting to drop my bag off and the mf behind is singing along to 500 miles playing over the loud speaker with a blue lives matter shirt jolly as could be

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flying machete @cmidds

4 years ago

Gonna get a fake I’d just so I can go to Applebees and have them do their happy happy birthday song

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flying machete @cmidds

5 years ago

@youlovearya W a piece of bread 🤧

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flying machete @cmidds

5 years ago

I could call my roommate out for not washing his dishes or not washing his hands after he takes a shit but microwaving his hot dogs is where I draw the line

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flying machete @cmidds

5 years ago

@PromoGuyMI 3

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Stefan Bondy @SbondyNBA

5 years ago

So many people making sure nobody touches LeBron

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flying machete @cmidds

5 years ago

@gabagoolfrog Tried to tell u 😪

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Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco

5 years ago

Meet my best friend pain

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flying machete @cmidds

6 years ago

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flying machete @cmidds

6 years ago

5 gum commercials gave me my first boner

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marlo @marloaviani

6 years ago

would yall hold yall potna like dis in da club? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

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flying machete @cmidds

6 years ago

@icedoutomnitrix Be sure to have Plumber’s tape on hand

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Buzz Lightyear🛸 @J_LOADING00

6 years ago

Retweet this Asap. Trying to find out this police officer’s name and Badge number . This is not my video but Baltimore city needs one less worthless police officer off the street.