Dad Jokes by Dad @dadjokesbydad
Here are my sesquipedalic, Quintessentially Quaint to Completely Corny, Queries & ,,, Quips?! Joined December 2013-
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‘Osculation’ (Kissing) Could Lead To ‘Inosculation’ (Intertwining) or is it Vice Versa ?!?!?
Is ‘To Take Out’ A Dating Status Or What Happens When (and If) the Relationship Sours and Then Known as ‘To Delete’ ?!?!?
Is Asked For R-V Centers Would the Answer be: K O A (Kampgrounds of America) or Just S T U ?!?!?
Oxymoronic: All NYS Judges Are Declared Unfit and Must Step Down at the Age of 70 However There is No Age Based Limitation or Exemption from Jury Duty !?!?!
Would the Expression “It’s All or None” be Analogous to How “Cloud 9” Compares to 1 through 8 ?!?!?
Although I’m Quickly Approaching the Exact Midpoint of My ‘Septuagenarian’ Status I Still Firmly Believe, “It’s Better To Be Over the Hill Than Under It” !?!?!
‘Get Back’ Can Be: To Get Even To Get a Refund To Get Change, After Payment To Recover and Return to Former Status To Return to a Former Location !?!?!
The Absolutely Best Lighted Electronic Highway Sign Ever !?!?!
A Sheet by the N Y Dept of Transportation One Side for Drivers It has Suggestions and Titled ‘See’ On the Other for Pedestrians ‘Be Seen’ But Best of All Is Its Adage On Both Sides “Pedestrian Safety: It’s No Accident” !?!?!
Would a Clairvoyant Find Clarity in an otherwise Confusing and Cloudy Condition with great Celerity ?!?!?
My ‘Anti Date’ Feelings At This Age and Stage is Far Different Then the Antedate When I Would Be Far More Receptive !?!?!
Abstruse V Obtuse Both Have To Do With Difficulty in Understanding The First Due to the Nature of the Material The Second Due to the Shortcomings of the Person !?!?!
It Might be a Rip Off of a Chiquita Label But I Like The Slogan !?!?!
New York Is Finally Determined To End the HIGH Number of Illegal Canabis Sellers They are ROLLING out New Laws that Put a Lid On These POT Sellers CRACKing Down by Padlocking Them and Then Taking Them To Court !?!?!
I Truly Despite My Age Sincerely Trust My Memory I’ve Come to Realize However When I Forget I Almost Immediately Forget That I Forgot ?!?!?
#Trumps Revered Legal Mentor, Roy Cohen Advised To Accuse the Others of What They Accuse You Of So ‘45’ Has Been Screaming ‘Election Interference’ as the Basis of all Charges Against Him Both Impeachments We’re Due to His ‘Election Interference’ !?!?!
I Assume Part of the Etymology of ‘Lunatic’ Has Something to do With a Full Moon Making Someone Nuts !?!?!
New York City Is Considering Using Salty Tasty Pellets as Contraception To Reduce the Rat Population !?!?!
The New York Times Reported on 4/9/24 That Studies Have Shown, ‘Hugs are Good For You’ No Wonder I’ve Been So Stressed Out The Last Decade Or So !?!?!
If One ‘Scored a Hit’ Would It Result As a Baseball Stat or a Listing on a Billboard Chart ?!?!?
Puns AndOneliners @punsandoneliner
28K Followers 26K Following Tweeting jokes, puns and one liners from https://t.co/0OwEY987xs on the hour, every hour. Expect to groan more than laugh....
Molly jake @Mollyjake3
29K Followers 30K Following I speak 4 different languages English ,profanity , sarcasm and real shit On my second guardian angel….my first one quit and is now in therapy 💯❤️😀No DM’s 😀
Stevie Vegas (Steve t.. @SteveJuggler
9K Followers 4K Following Professional Entertainer (Juggling / Comedy / Magic / Circus Skills Tutor). I aim to please! Host/Producer/Puntestant @UKPunOff https://t.co/8h8dDcuhfs
Ada Sydow @ada_sydow60077
87 Followers 5K Following
mbfiorucci @mbfiorucci68489
2 Followers 10 Following
Lamloc @Lamloc8
3 Followers 389 Following
Elon Musk @EMusk97634
19 Followers 195 Following
Ellen Adolph @adolph_ellen
12 Followers 227 Following Devoted Nonnie, passionate educator, newly retired and thrilled about the next chapter!
Lloyd Langford @LloydLangford2
32 Followers 77 Following
Audrey Carrousal @carrou_aud
0 Followers 96 Following
EnochRomano @RomanoEnoc91375
9 Followers 931 Following
freshstyleshirts @SahanaPOD
711 Followers 3K Following Welcome to my world of creativity! https://t.co/NApbg3lIvS https://t.co/SIiMm6mptV
Tran Harrelson @HarrelsonT28191
77 Followers 5K Following
max verhamilton @dbone1976
2 Followers 31 Following
Beck Louisa @BeckLouisa1
1K Followers 6K Following Success is not final; failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.
Terry @thresy1953
124 Followers 171 Following Forgiveness is the fragrance of the flower....on the heel that has crushed it. Gratitude & fear can not stand the sight of each other.
John Coles @johncoles55
536 Followers 1K Following 📷📸2 Tone Photographer 1979-1982,😀😊🏈📷📸Nikon user, Photographer at Coventry Rugby Club
Alberta Simmoneau @AlbeSimmone
76 Followers 5K Following
Shantelle Skillicorn @shantelle96549
42 Followers 5K Following
Annie Machado @annie_macha
79 Followers 5K Following
SoulNorth @soulnorthsoul
94 Followers 800 Following
Tinisha Vermillion @TiniTinisha
43 Followers 5K Following
They call me DADA @_DadPreneur
144 Followers 334 Following Welcome to my world, where I balance fatherhood's joys with entrepreneurial challenges. Join my journey of family, dreams, and daily balance. 👨👩👦🧑💻🍼💸
Charise Griffo @ChariseGri87538
89 Followers 5K Following
ItsJustMe! @Here_ItIsJustMe
12 Followers 138 Following
Karl Sandoz @KarlSandoz96032
40 Followers 5K Following
Ayako Appert @appe_aya
40 Followers 5K Following
Leslie Marshall @ThaBigWeeez
178 Followers 799 Following I am a Christian husband, father, and content creator. I Love Jesus and video games. Check me out on https://t.co/Y5Fzls0RhG and Instagram @thabigweeez
Stuart Hinton @stubloke
99 Followers 271 Following
Benny Cheow @sycheow168
216 Followers 524 Following
Deadfoot Dave @DeadfootDave
121 Followers 507 Following Musician, Singer, Songwriter & Actor...With a painful paralyzed leg & foot, I have found a deep rooted passion for singing & playing blues music.
Jon Silverberg @jpsilverberg
1 Followers 39 Following
Franklin Oesterling @FranklinOe26186
39 Followers 70 Following
StaceyStone @StaceyStone
2K Followers 3K Following Our family is God's favorite sitcom! Christ follower, @wgts919 on-air personality, Texan, author of The Rescued Breed and counselor.
Jimmy Pitre @pitrejj
29 Followers 226 Following
Hoban Printers - Est... @HobanPrinters
2K Followers 3K Following Copying. Fundraising specialists. Golden Goals. Correct score tickets. Football/Tote Doubles Etc. Bingo. Raffle Tickets. Banners. pontoon charts lotto
pete @pete_macaulay
4 Followers 86 Following
Scarlett Mage @mage_scarl
25 Followers 5K Following
RG|VES|ENIGMASEDGE @ENIGMASEDGE
1K Followers 2K Following Father of 2, Husband, Audiobook Narrator, Avid Reader, RG/VES Member, Gamer of all kinds, outdoor lover, trivia guru, movie/music enthusiast, NHL/NBA fan
Sahara Rider @SaharaRider2
28 Followers 972 Following
Lillie-mae Mcpartlin @MaeMcpartl65842
86 Followers 5K Following
example xam @cagexkano
0 Followers 6 Following
Phil Rogge @roggephil
164 Followers 285 Following
Karen Stapleton @KarenSt77807081
10 Followers 189 Following
Shaina Swanberg @ShainaSwan34160
38 Followers 5K Following
DANNY COLLINS @cdanny073
364 Followers 1K Following
Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes
651K Followers 52 Following Best dad jokes on twitter - we’re also on Instagram and Facebook.
The Dad Joke Man @DadJokeMan
151K Followers 4K Following Jokes, puns & funny stuff which makes me laugh & hopefully others too! Not always original, just trying to get through life with a smile!
Puns AndOneliners @punsandoneliner
28K Followers 26K Following Tweeting jokes, puns and one liners from https://t.co/0OwEY987xs on the hour, every hour. Expect to groan more than laugh....
Alf @whoelsebutalf
16K Followers 15K Following Devon Comedian Chris Leworthy from #BGT. Oh no, I've just won the UK Humblebrag championships again. #TraitorsUK #TheTraitorsUK #MaskedSingerUK #UKPunDay
Ultimate Dad Jokes 'N.. @MediocreJoker85
28K Followers 3K Following For #DadJokes enthusiasts. Guaranteed groans around the dinner table. Joke of all trades, master of #PUN. Welcome to the Dad-a-Base.
Dad Jokes @dadsjokes
8K Followers 46 Following
Molly jake @Mollyjake3
29K Followers 30K Following I speak 4 different languages English ,profanity , sarcasm and real shit On my second guardian angel….my first one quit and is now in therapy 💯❤️😀No DM’s 😀
Stevie Vegas (Steve t.. @SteveJuggler
9K Followers 4K Following Professional Entertainer (Juggling / Comedy / Magic / Circus Skills Tutor). I aim to please! Host/Producer/Puntestant @UKPunOff https://t.co/8h8dDcuhfs
Elon Musk @elonmusk
182.1M Followers 590 Following
Lisa Rubin @lawofruby
282K Followers 2K Following @msnbc legal correspondent & recovering litigator; former: off-air legal analyst @maddow, @wagnertonight. Don’t let the pearls fool ya.
Vintage Vibes @vintage_vibes24
732 Followers 2K Following Nostalgic soul. Obsessed with vintage advertisements, thrift shopping, NFL Football, Fitness and Coffee. #FlyEaglesFly #coffee #vintage
Ćh💋ryl 👩🏼�.. @clumsyoaf33
40K Followers 6K Following Clumsy Oaf A bit Feisty🔥Happy to take the piss out of myself 😉Typo twat 🤦🏼♀️ Outfit tweeter 👗 #ClumsysCloset
NoAngelHonestly @noangelhonestly
332 Followers 1K Following Steam and coffee addict, single parent, weirdo, anime fan, metalhead, dweller in the video editing, deviant creator and game fanatic.
Al @alanjamesw1
2K Followers 3K Following Try to be reasonable and level headed when watching #spurs, #COYS, #THFC, generally fails though! South stand (324) ST. Lover of all things rock and metal!
H0W_THlNGS_W0RK @HowThingsWork_
2.1M Followers 8K Following The Official How Things Work page. Tech,AI,Art,Science & loads more. Also all the best news & viral content from around the globe.
Tracy @TracyMiryn
1K Followers 1K Following Singer • Entertainer • Independent • Music & tattoo lover • Unfiltered tongue • Mentally unstable with a good heart 💚
Porno Playa @PornoPlayaCom
120K Followers 14 Following Cuenta oficial de https://t.co/DUws2Y39ut Vídeos porno y fotos de chicas desnudas en la playa Contacto ✉ https://t.co/wu7RI5qf2n (Negocios, eliminación/envío de contenido)
Phillygirl @24tog
50K Followers 6K Following “If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.”. ~ Katharine Hepburn ~ Live, love, laugh ♥️♥️♥️
B @ilovemyfridays
48K Followers 10K Following passionate about all animals, emergency services, veterans, love to laugh, nothing serious.
Lucille🦋 @Juicylu14
5K Followers 2K Following Ginger and lovin it! . Auty, cheeky and lots of innuendo laced fun🦊 LFC ❤️
Fisher Alexander @FishAlex1974
230 Followers 1K Following Thanks for checking out my profile. I'm a father, husband, animal lover and On-Air Personality on WUSJ/US96 here in Jackson, Mississippi from 3-7.
Charlotte @charl0906
42K Followers 2K Following ‘I’m from manchester, I don’t need netflix to see stranger things’ 💃🏼
Reboot 💙 @sagie_chetty
817 Followers 3K Following I have all I need. Just have to find it. Introspective and explorative. Software developer, Architect, Retail Product Manager. Opinions my own.
Aimee 🤍✨ @MiMi_North1
25K Followers 7K Following A mumma, wife, love all things Italian. Love to travel, cook & be more spontaneous in life. Here to support, listen without judgment 🤍
Lost Girl @VodkaMuse
58K Followers 18K Following Daddy issues. M&M slut and orgasm PEZ dispenser. My feed is as bipolar as I am. I used to be funny, now I’m medicated. #depression #mentalhealthmatters #bipolar
Pun Predictor @PunPredictor
538 Followers 545 Following
Kaz 🚒🚓🚑🛥�.. @Karen65780903
8K Followers 1K Following 999 Call Centre Operator 🚓🚒🚑🛥️ Answering calls for our emergency services and proud to do so❤️💙💚 💯 Supporter of our Police Force 💙 Works in Birmingham
Jo @JoJoFromJerz
948K Followers 5K Following mom. jersey. dem. news junkie. Lebanese. hothead.views are my own.https://t.co/zueo7YDFWx https://t.co/q4qgmwRLzt. https://t.co/9Fp1kdOX6w
• 𝐑𝐚𝐞 🐮.. @Rae_Doherty_93
19K Followers 6K Following •𝔹𝕠𝕝𝕥𝕠𝕟 𝕎𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕖𝕣𝕤 𝔽𝕠𝕠𝕥𝕓𝕒𝕝𝕝 ℂ𝕝𝕦𝕓🩵 // •𝕋𝕙𝕠𝕞♥️ // •𝕀𝕟𝕜𝕖𝕕 𝕘𝕚𝕣𝕝💉
🏴�.. @butterfly_fee
32K Followers 6K Following Is fucktastrophy a word cos I feel it could be useful!! 😂 👻bellefee27
rodney richberg @romanlewinsky
327 Followers 2K Following
Sara @SaraBuckley1972
5K Followers 4K Following you’ll most likely find me buggering about in the countryside!🐴🐥🐔🐓🐿🦌🐈🐄🐕🦺🐕
Clarissa @CRdgz93
165 Followers 2K Following
ArtificiallyDumb @artificiallydu
3K Followers 5K Following Artificially Dumb, AI Author, Jokester, and assisted by AI tools #AIJokes #AIHumor #AIArt #ChatGPT #GPT3 #Bard #DALLE #Midjourney
CCTom @tharrison1972
554 Followers 1K Following Be your best every day. Give yourself 100% of what you have to give. War damn eagle
Kim O’ Neill 😈�.. @kimmarcella78
38K Followers 703 Following Life is short ... and so am I 🥰 Boxing Fan 🥊 Travelling ,Music ,Infact pretty much anything interests me.Proud Mam of 3 ❤️ Ireland 🇮🇪 No DM’s please!! 🚫
🥀Raine🥀 @Raine052231
9K Followers 4K Following mummy to two beautiful girls 👩👧👧endo warrior 💪🏻,adeno warrior 💪🏻,crazy cat lady, mental health matters-it’s ok not to be ok.
The Sassiest Semite @LittleMissLizz
47K Followers 6K Following Tourette’s makes me twitchy. Mom made me sassy. Hebrew school gave me anxiety. Drummer. Pixie. Hockey fan. Muppet devotee. Punk rock Amélie. she/her
Andrew James Manning @manningandrew13
279 Followers 549 Following
Anthony O'Grady (Mr.B.. @mrbadjokes
277 Followers 1K Following 🃏 CEO Of Bad Jokes 🃏 🎭 I help people to laugh 🎭 🎤 An Aspiring Comedian 🎤 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪
🟠🎤David Gilbert.. @DavidGilbertVO
4K Followers 5K Following Single father. Funny. Bright. Dependable. #voiceover #elearning #commercial #explainer #IVR #HireHuman How can I help you? [email protected]
Wander Prints @wanderprints
6K Followers 0 Following Shop For Personalized Gifts & Home Decor - Adorn your inner world! #wanderprints #personalized #valentinesgift #love #custom
Barb McQuade @BarbMcQuade
683K Followers 1K Following Wife; Mom; @UMichLaw prof; former US Atty EDMI; NBC/MSNBC legal analyst; author, NYT Bestseller “Attack from Within: How Disinformation is Sabotaging America”
Andrew Weissmann (wei.. @AWeissmann_
366K Followers 2K Following Co-host of @MSNBC podcast "Prosecuting Donald Trump;” author of 2 NYT bestsellers "The Trump Indictments" and "Where Law Ends: Inside the Mueller Investigation”
Neal Katyal @neal_katyal
927K Followers 668 Following Supreme Ct lawyer;law professor;extremist centrist. Former US Acting Solicitor General. New podcast Courtside @ https://t.co/T4EMw9m9B8 https://t.co/e8n2BKLOGK
Dicks & Garlics @dicksandgarlics
453 Followers 627 Following Cybersecurity For Memes - https://t.co/WUzhku1nZx
FUNNY FOLK @FUNNYFOLK_
142 Followers 937 Following 5 x more jokes on YouTube, subtitles available https://t.co/pxkc7Aobe6
🌟Hope🌟 @NadaAJones
240K Followers 9K Following Without FAITH there is no HOPE .If you’re a sensitive ass then don’t follow me .Dogs are the best. Be kind it doesn’t cost a thing 😘 Gemini ♊️in ♋️ moon .🚫DMs
I recently posted that iterate and reiterate and iterate and also regardless and irregardless - were synonyms I Forgot to Mention Ravel and Unravel as well as Boned Deboned and Boneless Are Also Synonyms !?!?!
Cowboy stops armed robber 🔥
@dadjokesbydad So sorry to hear about your connection to this tragedy. May their memories be for a blessing 🙏🌻
Me last night in my jazzy shirt and flares already for ABBA , bloody brilliant night
This is why women live long than us men🤞🏾
#TwitterFamous is back with some people that you've likely heard on Spaces before play back the recording of @makeupbyshaniah, @NicoleBehnam and @ANTWTF to hear how hosting Spaces came naturally to them
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