sgrocks @MajorBlunders
Former under 9 Staffordshire County Chess Champion and great grandson of the inventor of the hair clip. Your arousal is palpable. sgrocks83.wordpress.com Shrewsbury -on- Sea Joined October 2011-
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"I've made some dairy free brownies for your son." "Wow, that's great. Thanks. How did you make them?" "Well, I buttered a baking tray......
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My PC? Er, those pictures? I'm, er, writing a book. Yes, really. It's about hot lesbians and that.
Had a lovely walk around a deer park with my autistic son. Or Fenton, as I now call him.
A card reads;"To my wife on Mother's Day." Must be a Shropshire one.
I think I'm on a promise tonight. The promise of being kept awake by coughing and various other maladies floating around the house.
Tired and numb from wine. Need. To. Go. To. Bed. And. Speak. In. Full. Sentences.
I don't really keep up with current affairs, but I keep hearing a lot about gay marriage. They're not making it compulsory are they?
Phone battery on red, fuel light on and I need a poo. I think I might turn this into a screenplay.
Apparently, Doctors don't actually cup your balls when doing that coughing test thing. Unless you ask. Which I do.
There's probably a good reason that doctors don't recommend electrical tape as a wound dressing.
So, the weather is set to be good this weekend after all. My other half has therefore finally cancelled the BBQ. The bell end.
If you make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make that (key) change.
I remember the days when everyone agreed with Nick.
Oh, apparently it could be nice this weekend after all. Who's the bell end now? Still her.
Frost, rain, snow. The plans for the weekend's BBQ have still not been changed by my fiancée. The bell end.
Applying Vaseline to something plastic to stick it in a small hole. But don't panic, I'm an electrician! About to shove a dildo up my arse.
It's easy to mock the Martin/Paltrow separation. But let's not forget the kids involved, Moses and Apple. Their names are worth a mock too.
Yesterday I defrosted the van. Today it pissed down. Naturally my fiancée has organised a BBQ for the weekend.
𝗧𝘄𝗼𝗽 𝗧... @TwopTwips
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𝗧𝘄𝗼𝗽 𝗧... @TwopTwips
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