Baby Jesus @JCautomatic
I once donated some sperm. The man shaking the charity bucket was not impressed though. The North Joined November 2010-
Tweets33K
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Followers12K
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Following265
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Likes9K
youtu.be/MXWl1Y4brx0?si… A long lost friend’s son. This is unreal!!!!
Morrisons Ultimate Breakfast review accompanied by a sad piccolo flute.
Probably the best band in the world right now. New single. Think they’ve already won. open.spotify.com/album/4gdlAYu8…
Artwork of Neil Hannon of the @divinecomedyhq completed today by my good friend and amazing artist @JCautomatic which he has generously gifted to my wife and me as we and he are big fans of his genius music and songwriting. #Divalady #NorthEastEngland #artwork #NationalExpress
Bloody lovely this! northstatebeer.com
Once again, these so called boffins are telling us that red wine is good for your “gut health” What a load of codswallop, I drank two and a half bottles of the stuff the other night and promptly shat myself. I will be sticking to white wine in the future. @vizcomic
Newcastle United, emptying stadiums since April ‘23. #nufc
Me: Hello is that the Samaritans? Samaritans: Yes. Me: I’ve just made small talk in the supermarket. Samaritans: Sorry we don’t…….. Me: They had a big wart on their eyelid and were wearing comfortable shoes. Samaritans: I’ll put you through.
Weird how things that I turn off sound like @Elbow songs.
FIND out if the people camping next to you are listening to you have sex by simply seeing if they pause Netflix when you say “up the pumper?”

Moose Allain Ꙭ @MooseAllain
124K Followers 2K Following He/him. Illustrator, cartoonist, husband, father, son, brother, uncle, nephew, cousin, second cousin, grandson, friend, acquaintance, enemy. @[email protected]
GlennyRodge @GlennyRodge
25K Followers 1K Following Screenwriter, comedian, actor, socialist and model. These are words. As are custard, trumpet, wardrobe, trousers and dandelion.
Amanda @Pandamoanimum
95K Followers 716 Following Welcome to my head. Please excuse the mess. Also on Bluesky: https://t.co/TOrnVfkzQ1 Threads: https://t.co/pmlQc89QB5
Jason @NickMotown
25K Followers 886 Following Musky sly old foxy stoat. Also being musky, sly, old, foxy and stoat-like here: https://t.co/ZcF72vWkNl
Neil @_Enanem_
14K Followers 502 Following Good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good double, double good.
Craig Deeley 🇪🇺... @craiguito
19K Followers 7K Following I do stand-up and tweet silly things. My podcast Trish of the Day out now, link below.
joe heenan @joeheenan
59K Followers 2K Following Award losing stand up comedian. Co host of Stu & Joe's Big Dumb Film Show. Subscribe here https://t.co/Ts0zTiHNI9
Pundamentalism @Pundamentalism
93K Followers 955 Following Puns don't kill people. Writer. DM for work enquiries.
Mitten d'Amour @MittenDAmour
20K Followers 440 Following I once bought a cold drink for a tramp on a hot day - turns out he wasn’t a secret millionaire; total fucking waste of 80p. (She/her)
Pope Grumpnatious III @mostly_grumpy
6K Followers 681 Following It's almost certain your activist mock outrage would be fuck all use on a desert island. Go and sit over there with the other people we're going to eat.
Nick Harvey @mrnickharvey
53K Followers 785 Following I write music for TV so you don’t have to. Baskerville’s dad. Paul’s son. Ember’s accompanist.
Tokyo Sexwhale @tokyosexwhale
20K Followers 912 Following IIllustrator | Commissions: [email protected]
Bacardi Oakheart @Midgetgems26
6K Followers 769 Following A husband, a father, a philosopher, a music lover, a bell end. Your one stop shop for the destruction of mainstream thought.
Summer Ray @SummerRay
32K Followers 1K Following voiceover/writer/illustrator/absolute joke. https://t.co/nwwRcZusqj
Miranda Keeling @MirandaKeeling
27K Followers 501 Following Author. Actor. Observer of everyday life. Buy my new book: https://t.co/aACmVRcO8l Book launch: https://t.co/It0hRTN81C
Mahinth Joe Christens... @mahinthjoe
2K Followers 5K Following Building institutional knowledge I Tenderfoot weird 1 of a kind F;) serve & be prosperous Student Forever Fallor Ergo Sum Wabi-sabi h=r/e He/Him/His
Alex Chapman @AlexChapma92004
136 Followers 2K Following
🇺🇸ASS @betosanc
6K Followers 6K Following ASS are my initials. When you are dead, you don’t know that you are dead. it is difficult only for others. It is the same when you are stupid.
SarcyJ @SarcyJ3409
1 Followers 101 Following views are not my own ( mostly copied, robbed or permanently borrowed on a temporary basis)
Andy @mrandyrogers1
22 Followers 178 Following
Coach T @TvrdyJoe
127 Followers 201 Following
RogueBunny @RogueBunny
238 Followers 104 Following
Northern Observer @08Northerner15
24 Followers 241 Following
Michael Lennon @MichaelLen92898
21 Followers 246 Following Irish blood English heart, Roman Catholic. Second cousin of John Lennon.
Michael @minealone6
3K Followers 4K Following Likes -Pizza, Chili, Nachos, pumping Iron, a good cigar, a bad cigar, Traveling, Cats, Candy -specially Snickers, old Popeye cartoons, cookies and milk, hotdogs
Toasue @Toasueo4Y
12 Followers 241 Following
Michael Lennon @MickLennon97508
96 Followers 508 Following Roman Catholic, monkey Hanger, Irish blood English heart, Erasure. West Hartlepool, Liverpool and Belmullet County Mayo.
Alison Patton @AlisonPatt32085
0 Followers 40 Following
. @soundslikeem
357 Followers 1K Following
Phantom Raspberry Blo... @Phant0mRasberry
43 Followers 299 Following
Stuart Coghlan @stuartwickow
52 Followers 228 Following
Ad Moore 🐶 @Ruffey_1
1K Followers 7K Following 🎒👕👖🇱🇷 I be in heaven 🌴🎥🍿🎶🚦📲📱🗺️ 🫗✨📺🎸🪨✍️📰📍🚭🏤 Willow S Moore 🪑🪟🚪Grade 🅰️➕🎂🙂↕️Film Director 🙂↔️🏭💅🎬✝️💕 👫📙USC 📚🪦🧑🏾🌾👋🔥🔥🔥
Surendar Uncle @Uncle_Surendar
5 Followers 103 Following
Stacy Roland @StrawBerlicous7
1 Followers 61 Following
Michael Lennon @MichaelPoo73989
103 Followers 397 Following Monkey Hanger, Hartlepool Utd. Erasure. Roman Catholic. Irish blood, English heart. Flexographic printer. Climate change is the biggest scam/hoax in the world.
Katharine @Kathari73135900
1 Followers 90 Following
Matty @bestestname
15K Followers 6K Following Twitter is easy. You just have to be funny all the time or no one will love you.
saripul abbit @saripulabbit
0 Followers 7 Following
CAPTAINSWERVYNERVES @CTODDMCCORMICK2
327 Followers 2K Following HELPING GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO NICE PEOPLE
JKNenagh @jkenne3
7 Followers 50 Following
Jeremy Bone @JeremyRBone
92 Followers 3K Following
Jim Fischer @jphf123456
83 Followers 230 Following Nothing much of interest here. I take a few pics when I'm out and about. North East England resident from Cumbria.
H @H19835049
12 Followers 233 Following
Andy Wales @AndyCWales
5K Followers 3K Following Helping businesses transition to sustainability. Alum @Accenture @btgroup @abinbev @stwater @interfaceinc @yglvoices. NED @WSUP_Intl. All views my own
Lee Jones @LeeJones10000
2K Followers 3K Following
mushroom @ivelinahh
7 Followers 72 Following I shall construct a labyrinth in which I can lose myself together with anyone who tries to find me.
Cavedweller444 @Cavedweller4441
4 Followers 442 Following
jason Vogel @jjv9072
18 Followers 252 Following
Robert Krenke @Krenkekinder
366 Followers 831 Following Human, Male, Father, Coach, Teacher, Activist, Trekkie, and so much more...
Moose Allain Ꙭ @MooseAllain
124K Followers 2K Following He/him. Illustrator, cartoonist, husband, father, son, brother, uncle, nephew, cousin, second cousin, grandson, friend, acquaintance, enemy. @[email protected]
GlennyRodge @GlennyRodge
25K Followers 1K Following Screenwriter, comedian, actor, socialist and model. These are words. As are custard, trumpet, wardrobe, trousers and dandelion.
Amanda @Pandamoanimum
95K Followers 716 Following Welcome to my head. Please excuse the mess. Also on Bluesky: https://t.co/TOrnVfkzQ1 Threads: https://t.co/pmlQc89QB5
Jason @NickMotown
25K Followers 886 Following Musky sly old foxy stoat. Also being musky, sly, old, foxy and stoat-like here: https://t.co/ZcF72vWkNl
Neil @_Enanem_
14K Followers 502 Following Good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good double, double good.
Craig Deeley 🇪🇺... @craiguito
19K Followers 7K Following I do stand-up and tweet silly things. My podcast Trish of the Day out now, link below.
joe heenan @joeheenan
59K Followers 2K Following Award losing stand up comedian. Co host of Stu & Joe's Big Dumb Film Show. Subscribe here https://t.co/Ts0zTiHNI9
Pundamentalism @Pundamentalism
93K Followers 955 Following Puns don't kill people. Writer. DM for work enquiries.
Mitten d'Amour @MittenDAmour
20K Followers 440 Following I once bought a cold drink for a tramp on a hot day - turns out he wasn’t a secret millionaire; total fucking waste of 80p. (She/her)
Pope Grumpnatious III @mostly_grumpy
6K Followers 681 Following It's almost certain your activist mock outrage would be fuck all use on a desert island. Go and sit over there with the other people we're going to eat.
Gabby Hutchinson Crou... @Scriblit
23K Followers 1K Following Comedy writer (News Quiz, Horrible Histories & more), author (Darkwood, The Rooks, Cursed).🐝 with the ☕ https://t.co/tPUv02QMv5
Nick Harvey @mrnickharvey
53K Followers 785 Following I write music for TV so you don’t have to. Baskerville’s dad. Paul’s son. Ember’s accompanist.
Tokyo Sexwhale @tokyosexwhale
20K Followers 912 Following IIllustrator | Commissions: [email protected]
Bacardi Oakheart @Midgetgems26
6K Followers 769 Following A husband, a father, a philosopher, a music lover, a bell end. Your one stop shop for the destruction of mainstream thought.
Street Life in North ... @NTStreetLife
1K Followers 855 Following A new independent organisation focused on campaigning for safer, better streets in North Tyneside, for streets full of life.
Brooklyn Brewery UK @BklynBreweryUK
3K Followers 590 Following Award-winning flavourful beers. Inspired by Brooklyn and brewed for all. Drink responsibly! Don't forward our content to under 18s. https://t.co/psq0pYHTij
The Bucket Playlist @PlaylistBucket
5K Followers 6K Following The Bucket Playlist - chasing the ultimate playlist! Music and interviews: https://t.co/6vspEFFPWe
Dr Jordan B Peterson @jordanbpeterson
6.2M Followers 2K Following Best-Selling Author | Clinical Psychologist | #1 Education Podcast | Co-founder of @petersonacademy | Order my new book "We Who Wrestle With God" here:
Jim Fischer @jphf123456
83 Followers 230 Following Nothing much of interest here. I take a few pics when I'm out and about. North East England resident from Cumbria.
Fesshole🧻 @fesshole
1.1M Followers 499 Following Confess your sins anon - will the internet absolve you? ADD FESS https://t.co/B6Bo42Rzeh LIVE SHOW TICKETS https://t.co/OBRqMIHFJk
No Context Brits @NoContextBrits
1.8M Followers 0 Following A mordant celebration of British mediocrity according to the Washington Post. Contains sarcasm, irony and context.
Rickshaw Theatre @RickshawTheatre
6K Followers 1K Following @RickshawTheatre is one of Vancouver's premier music and arts venues. We're Located in the heart of Vancouver's historic Chinatown. https://t.co/cmhWMNOTg3
O2 Academy Bristol @O2AcademyBris
22K Followers 577 Following The official account of O2 Academy Bristol. Home of high quality live shows, gigs and club nights. Est 2001.
mudhoney @mudhoney
24K Followers 109 Following Mark Arm, Steve Turner, Dan Peters & Guy Maddison. Tweets by @sebharp EVERY GOOD BOY DESERVES FUDGE 30th anniversary OUT NOW: https://t.co/rl8iXThzXN
Keith Edwards 🚨 �... @FabrizioFormag
1K Followers 0 Following North of England Football Writer for North Publications #EPL #PremierLeague
Kendal Calling Info @inthefieldsLIVE
9K Followers 273 Following If you're joining us in the fields for @kendalcalling please follow this official onsite twitter account for all essential info. See you in the fields!
BBC Glastonbury @bbcglasto
100K Followers 1K Following Glastonbury Festival 2023 takes place between June 21st - 25th. Watch and listen to the festival live, only on the BBC via @bbciplayer and @bbcsounds.
easyJet @easyJet
578K Followers 8K Following We’re here to help from 8am to 8pm GMT. You can also visit our online Help Hub here: https://t.co/Y3IbdcInAX ⚠️This is our only Twitter account.
Out Of Context Snooke... @OOCSnooker
40K Followers 163 Following Snooker images and videos tweeted with no context. Follow for funny content! #OOCSnooker #CueAction
Rage Against The Mach... @RATMofficial
96K Followers 0 Following Rage Against The Machine formed in LA in the early '90s: vocalist Zack de la Rocha; guitarist Tom Morello; drummer Brad Wilk; and bassist Tim C.
𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 ... @wouldLTM
429 Followers 482 Following Who would YOU like to meet? Send photo of you or a friend & for £12 I’ll draw a shonky pic of you alongside person of your choice. https://t.co/ys4zDHEO3b
Peaky Blinders @ThePeakyBlinder
865K Followers 449 Following Official account of #PeakyBlinders. Season 6 on @Netflix (worldwide) and @BBCiPlayer (UK) now.
Kerry Roffe @AGITHuk
1K Followers 1K Following glass and ceramics student. Owner of a massive cat and a photobombing dog. loves inappropriate clothing for a 50-something and red wine
James Timpson @JamesTCobbler
186K Followers 1K Following Minister of State for Prisons, Probation and Reducing Reoffending @MoJGovUK. Ex-CEO of Timpson. DMs not monitored.
O2 City Hall Newcastl... @O2CityHall
19K Followers 814 Following The official account of O2 City Hall Newcastle. Newcastle’s most historic and much-loved venue. Est 1928.
Rob Burrow CBE @Rob7Burrow
193K Followers 2K Following Legacy account of Rob Burrow CBE. Posts by the Burrow family and in support of the MND community.
Ed Brown @edbroown
19 Followers 170 Following
Clare Breedon @ClareBreedon
2K Followers 4K Following Oh well this is difficult... I love funny Twitter, I empathise with serious Twitter. I’m a sucker for a good cause and I absolutely hate injustice of any kind.
Rach @RachaelvsWorld
10K Followers 551 Following All of these opinions are yours and nothing to do with me
Monkseaton High @MonkseatonHigh
2K Followers 470 Following Monkseaton High School is dedicated to providing the best possible education and care for all its students.
The Gig Stories Podca... @GigStoriesPod
638 Followers 406 Following A celebration of gigs, venues, festivals and the live music experience - hosted by @alexwinterstv and @xtofallabout.
Jonnie Irwin @jonnieirwin
24K Followers 506 Following Escape To The Country, A Place In The Sun. Commercial Director of @judicaregroup. Also on https://t.co/KOSUSp26ep
Aniefiok 'Neef' Ekpou... @AniefiokEkp
9K Followers 1K Following Writer | Where We Come From: Rap, Home & Hope in Modern Britain 🇬🇧 is out now @Faberbooks | Rep’d by @Emf1nn | #Forbes30under30
Dan Carter @DanCarter
576K Followers 593 Following Former @AllBlacks 🇳🇿 @adidas international athlete. @glorious_digi. Ambassador @unicefnz
FOUNTAINHEAD @FountainheadOff
5 Followers 3 Following From the mind of Charity Founder & Author Stephen Wylie..... Creativity in the form of true Vegan beliefs, with strong Punk and Indie influences.
Crap Portraits @Crap_Portraits
7K Followers 711 Following Not intentionally Crap, just talent-less. Commissions as presents for people you hate. also on Bluesky https://t.co/dU7Hz0pIyK
BritishMasterBarbers @UKMasterBarbers
11K Followers 5K Following The British Master Barbers Alliance aims to support, promote and showcase the best of British barbering. Join today via our website.
The MHfed - The hairF... @FedsEducation
5K Followers 89 Following In partnership with @cityandguilds Helping To Facilitate Hairdressing And Barbering Education. In-House, In-Class & On-line. Art Teams #hairFED #MHFED
British Barbers @BritishBarbers
11K Followers 4K Following The British Barbers' Association is dedicated to offering support, advice & a range of products & services exclusively to barbers in the UK.
Victoria Fox | Best R... @BestRecipesUK
180K Followers 76K Following Delicious and easy-to-follow recipes for food lovers.
Tyne and Wear Metro @My_Metro
157K Followers 831 Following Real time travel updates. Page monitored day and night. Abusive tweets will not be tolerated. Contact: [email protected] 0191 2020 747.
PIXIES @PIXIES
293K Followers 135 Following Band formed in 1986 in Boston, Massachusetts. Management: [email protected] Official: @MrBlackFrancis @JoeySantiago