Altuve 4HoF ⚾ parody/fan, I am not Altuve! @ErinAstrosFan
b̶a̶s̶e̶b̶a̶l̶l̶ Astros Fan, WeatherNerd, Cyclist, Gardener & Proud Refusenik. Tweets &Likes Do NotMean Endorsement or Approval little Bubble Baseball World Joined August 2016-
Tweets282K
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Likes597K
@banalplay Are you sure about that!
Astros Pitchers First Inning Futility Tracker Runs given up: 35 Brown: 15 France: 7 Heaney: 5 Arrighetti: 4 Blanco: 4
Astros Pitchers First Inning Futility Tracker Runs given up: 35 Brown: 15 France: 7 Heaney: 5 Arrighetti: 4 Blanco: 4
If the restaurant has these chairs just walk out. The food is mid and 3 tacos cost $27.75
If the restaurant has these chairs just walk out. The food is mid and 3 tacos cost $27.75
Giving up several 1st inning runs & the Astros, name a better duo
They gave Loperfido #10? Too soon imo.
My dog just killed a chipmunk that got into the house 😳
I did a quick search and found that this lady, who refused to reveal her name, is named Johannah King-Slutzky. She is a paid instructor & PhD candidate at Columbia studying "theories of the imagination & poetry as interpreted through a Marxian lens" No, I'm not making this up.
I did a quick search and found that this lady, who refused to reveal her name, is named Johannah King-Slutzky. She is a paid instructor & PhD candidate at Columbia studying "theories of the imagination & poetry as interpreted through a Marxian lens" No, I'm not making this up.
Trevor Bauer calling out Mike Trout on HGH rumors 4 or 5 years ago must’ve been true the way he’s fallen apart physically since. It was like Rob Manfred & the Angels doped up the JJ Watt of baseball with the Brian Cushing needles.
This is her big break. The moment she's been waiting for. Claiming her rightful place in the spotlight. Everything she's done, her PhD in Marxist poetry, her pronoun selections, has led up to this. This is the terminus of feminism. Asking for bags of Lays to feed the other TAs…
This is her big break. The moment she's been waiting for. Claiming her rightful place in the spotlight. Everything she's done, her PhD in Marxist poetry, her pronoun selections, has led up to this. This is the terminus of feminism. Asking for bags of Lays to feed the other TAs…
Mess with the bull, you get the horns
Mess with the bull, you get the horns
@peterjholley @UTAustin If they think that’s bad just wait until they get into the grind of an SEC schedule this fall
Reporter grills Columbia student after she demands the university help feed protestors occupying Hamilton Hall: "It seems like you're saying, 'we want to be revolutionaries, we want to take over this building, now would you please bring us some food'."
This whole college campus ordeal is a great example about how sometimes the smartest people aren’t always the brightest…
This whole college campus ordeal is a great example about how sometimes the smartest people aren’t always the brightest…
I ain’t gonna lie… These city connects are absolute 🔥
I ain’t gonna lie… These city connects are absolute 🔥
Jose Abreu is being optioned to West Palm Beach effective tomorrow. GM Dana Brown said a great meeting was had where both sides agreed this was best for him to work on timing and getting back to where he was offensively last fall.
All of this. If a person doesn’t have enough room in their conception of the world for other opinions to simply exist they are just too dumb to converse with honestly, basically have to completely write them off.
All of this. If a person doesn’t have enough room in their conception of the world for other opinions to simply exist they are just too dumb to converse with honestly, basically have to completely write them off.
@CollinRugg Just turn off the electricity and WiFi Once those kids can't scroll TokTok TRUST ME they are coming out.... their phones will be dead in a day without power
Taco Tuesday
Ready For Your Jaw Hit The Floor? This woman heard Jamie Dimon, the CEO of JP Morgan, the largest bank in America on the Wall Street Journal’s podcast What she heard was so “f*cking out of touch” with America she had to stop what she was doing & make this video He said this…
🏆🔥 ⚾️ SLEEP.. @astros_dude
7K Followers 2K Following Houston Sports | Please Do Not Follow Me | Engagement Account | Satire
Adam Clanton @adamclanton
43K Followers 2K Following 🎙#TheATeam weekdays 3-6p CT on @SportsTalk790, flagship of the @HoustonRockets and @astros. #Rockets Radio Network host. Hater of mayonnaise and glitter.🤘🏼🔥
Ben DuBose @BenDuBose
35K Followers 960 Following Houston and Mizzou sports. Editor of USA Today’s @TheRocketsWire. Analyst for @SportsTalk790. Human with opinions. Podcasts: @TheLagerLine and @LockedOnRockets
ThatAstrosGirl @ThatAstrosGirl
21K Followers 9K Following Cohost on JuiceBox Blondies! 🧃 Get the @psf_app to join us! #astros #mlb shoes always by @nardgotsole_htx
Htown Wheelhouse™�.. @HtownWheelhouse
8K Followers 5K Following Father, Grandfather | CoHost of @lockedonAstros | @Stros411 | The Game Contributor @ESPN_SWLA I Co-Host Back to the Bullpen Podcast with Mike Stanton @B2Bullpen
CobosQue @CobosQue
11K Followers 1K Following 2012 Rusk St Tues-Sunday 11a-10 Not a bar. Not a restaurant. A vibe. http://www.coboshtx.
Turtle 🏆🏆 @TickingTurtle
3K Followers 4K Following Easily Amused Astros fan-Former LEO-Forensic Chemistry-Independent Party-No DM’s please mainly b/c I never check-🏳️🌈
WASTEPH @wasteph_wes
3K Followers 2K Following Lover of Whiskey. I have a love/hate relationship with Houston sports. I cuss too much, so be it. Some of my content is NSFW. Not a suggested follow
Shoulda Sent Hunter B.. @quallsastros
4K Followers 3K Following Astros unofficial tracker of randomness. Look for my game recaps and Who I Blame lists. Bruh, I’m not Chad Qualls. #ForTheHou #ThinOrangeLine
𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕾𝖍.. @_ShadowStro
3K Followers 3K Following Iron sharpens iron ✍ Astros Aggies Cowboys Rockets Canes *AA saved my life* Don't do Fentanyl 🧐
Space City Sports @LiveSCS
12K Followers 2K Following The Astros have beaten your favorite team too many times to count. 2X Champs. THIS IS A FAN PAGE. I’m just trolling, don’t take it personally.
longhorndave @longhorndave
6K Followers 7K Following Longhorns, Astros, Elvis, Denver teams🤘🇺🇸⚾️🏈🏒🏃💪🏋🍺🥃☕️🚀🛰👨🚀 @lhd_on_sports, @Yelp, ISTP, Married, #Followback, DM for friends only
Bregman’s Wheelbarr.. @newguymeltz
3K Followers 1K Following 2017/2022 Champs America’s DYNASTY! Rockets,Jets, Devils TERPS. Bruce Springsteen nut. Jon Heyman once wrote an article about me. Not affiliated w Alex Bregman
Miranduh @2017Simp
3K Followers 2K Following Professional housewife and day drinker. Go Astros. NO DMS. NOOOO DMS!!!!
Dr AssBurger @DeeZnuts4funS
1K Followers 658 Following Twitter is the monument to the stupidity of man - Gen George S Patton. Proud Stroud Boy
🤘🏻That Astros/L.. @cpenny81
3K Followers 4K Following Christian, Astros TWO TIME World Series Champions. See you in 2024. Your BIG 12 CHAMPION TEXAS LONGHORNS! SEC BOUND! The Golden Age continues. 🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼
Larry FooteSack @atxhobogrl
4K Followers 1K Following Paying bums to stand in line for ducats at Whataburger since 2003. #TRNDenMother #CookieBitch
Houston Astros 🇫�.. @AstrosFrance
3K Followers 1K Following ⚾️ French fan account of your 2017, 2022 #Worldseries champions - 🧑🚀#relentless
Walt Penberthy @TErnestos
165 Followers 452 Following Cuban inspired, great on chicken, seafood, meat, veggies, nuts, pretzels, in cheeses. "Makes What You Make Better!!" Member @PodcastAstros Team
Claude Pickens @Astropickens
24 Followers 408 Following
Hal Steinbrenner’s .. @HalcheckbookRBW
3K Followers 3K Following Hal Steinbrenner stop being cheap. Joe Douglas Defender. Mostly trolling, but some occasionally intelligent thoughts. Blocked By Rudy Giuliani
Leebaggs @Leebaggs1
495 Followers 882 Following Husband. Father. Full time Sportsball fan…Part time automotive capitalist and retired bar trivia legend . Braves, Dawgs, Hawks, Falcons.
Jairon @Jairon_Ordonez
739 Followers 569 Following
Emily @woodeemily455
5 Followers 261 Following I am very serious of finding a good man with a good personality. Of course being honest and loyal really matters too.
Jason Bottrell @SmileyJenkins
164 Followers 860 Following just trying to build that log cabin. be nice.
Steve Hopkins @Hop4545
311 Followers 1K Following
Honest Astros Fan @AstrosFanHonest
28 Followers 141 Following Jesus saves. Honesty is the best policy. If you can be anything, be kind. #Relentless. Huge Astros fan! Amateur chef/baker. Sporadic Tweeter. RT≠endorsements.
Jada Singh @JadaSingh148949
6 Followers 77 Following
Space City Sports Fan.. @ThatAstrosKid42
329 Followers 986 Following Houston Astros/Texans fanatic | Weapon Enthusiast | Aviation Enthusiast | Law Enforcement Supporter | Animation Fanboy | 🇺🇸/🇵🇭/🇲🇽 | #Relentless
LeeFinleyforJudge @FinleyforJudge
1K Followers 1K Following Candidate for Place #8 on the Texas Court of Criminal Appeals in the March 5th, 2024 Republican Primary
Katy Kircher @KatyKircher
508 Followers 1K Following
Sherrye Pomeroy @sherrye_pomeroy
339 Followers 228 Following Former Prosecutor, Sr. Correspondent. Grade A snark and inane non sequiturs, threat to democracy, the usual.
AndyTheScot_Texas @Illuminawti
1K Followers 1K Following Legal immigrant - US citizen. Iraq veteran (PSD), pro-2A and USA. Qualified sneak reaper, may be cranky and impolite. Not a Jew but pro-Israel. GenXer - FAFO.
loewiedefinesse 🇮�.. @loewiedefinesse
953 Followers 3K Following Blanke Lives Matter 🏛 Free Vlamestine 🦁 📖 Democracy: the god that failed 🕉☸️ Global Dharma rasjtra 🌍 🏛 Europa est fides nostra 🇪🇺
Kyle Tucker's Batting.. @AstrosWinn
104 Followers 228 Following
teachermom @teachermom83587
428 Followers 2K Following A mom of 4 littles and a 1st grade teacher, trying to balance it all with more fun and less stress.
Elizabeth Heckman �.. @ElizabethHeckm9
10K Followers 3K Following Texas girl forever. Probably talking about sports & politics. RT/likes not endorsements. Doing stuff @FoxNews Instagram: @ elizabethheckman
Mental Astronaut @SeanRawlings10
2K Followers 2K Following Born and raised in the Houston Area. Fan of the Houston Rockets, Astros, and Texans/Oilers since 1985. Absurdist here. Don’t take me too seriously.
Azhar Ali @ali_azhar16238
2 Followers 12 Following
Rush Rib Lick @LickRibRush
415 Followers 526 Following Nonsense Tweeter ■ Fan of Astros, Texans, Dolphins, Hurricanes ■ Oft suspended for innocuous tweets ■ 10th profile to date
aylin 🤍👸🏻 @aylindi51280229
2 Followers 26 Following
Bobby Messer @BroncoAdven2r
8 Followers 407 Following Unapologetic fan of the Houston Astros. Lifetime Ford Bronco fanboy.
Vimala @Vimala457588
30 Followers 223 Following
GreatstoreUS @Solutionsx_LLC
334 Followers 2K Following
Scribbles @Scribbles646
2K Followers 1K Following Technical writer, Economist The Mars Society, Technology, Nature, Science, Energy
Dot🏆Astros fan @mus42883
166 Followers 157 Following
Carol Davila @CarolDavila65
328 Followers 895 Following I’m all about the Houston Astros, Houston Rockets and the Houston Texans! 🙌🙌🙌🙌⚾️🏈🏀 Hook Em 🤘
Moon Lotus @MoonL66695
21 Followers 46 Following
Bad Luck Brian @astrosmaniac001
811 Followers 2K Following Big sports fan | #Relentless ⚾️ 🏆🏆 | #Rockets 🏀 | #HTownMade 🏈 | TXST Alum 🎓 | Texas & UH “T-shirt” fan | Autism 🧩 | Posts & opinions are my own
Clay Ennis Astrophoto.. @clayennis
340 Followers 1K Following MilkyWay born and bred. Poetry work in @versezine
julia morales stan ac.. @astrosbatgirl
3K Followers 2K Following Jeremy Peña simp. Yankee bully. Blue Jay admirer. Still waiting on my invite to Bregman’s Bar Mitzvah. Regular giveaways! Htown til I drown. 🚂🍊🌆 🚀
Luis Pelaez @luisgpelaez80
66 Followers 72 Following
Short Sighted Rob @ShortSightedGuy
636 Followers 599 Following Survived the Zepp1978 purges and BHam1720 + THEREALALLENOU + pmclellan purge of '16. #SixTimePurgeSurvivor. @The_Reliant used to follow me. Before he was famous
Linda @OGAstrosFan
247 Followers 431 Following
H-Town Astros Fanatic @TownFanatic
850 Followers 2K Following Astros Fanatic for life! I say what I say. My opinions are my own.
Yankees Customer Supp.. @YankeesCS
38 Followers 157 Following Wow, What a great season Yankees are having. How can I help you today?
RIP DJ Screw @HoustonSprtsGod
675 Followers 615 Following You can plan a pretty picnic but you can’t predict the weather. | Everything Houston | Hook Em | I’m right, you wrong. 🇨🇲
Calico Joe @CalicoJoeMLB
16K Followers 16K Following I tend to talk about baseball. Jon Heyman is an idiot. Lou Whitaker is a Hall of Fame baseball player.
S. Gonzales @Stephen58746948
8 Followers 81 Following
Yordingdong©️ Szn @LDizzle713
724 Followers 990 Following Astros - Texans - Longhorns - Predators, I collect Baseball Cards. PC Yordan and anything Astros.
🏆🔥 ⚾️ SLEEP.. @astros_dude
7K Followers 2K Following Houston Sports | Please Do Not Follow Me | Engagement Account | Satire
Adam Clanton @adamclanton
43K Followers 2K Following 🎙#TheATeam weekdays 3-6p CT on @SportsTalk790, flagship of the @HoustonRockets and @astros. #Rockets Radio Network host. Hater of mayonnaise and glitter.🤘🏼🔥
Ben DuBose @BenDuBose
35K Followers 960 Following Houston and Mizzou sports. Editor of USA Today’s @TheRocketsWire. Analyst for @SportsTalk790. Human with opinions. Podcasts: @TheLagerLine and @LockedOnRockets
ThatAstrosGirl @ThatAstrosGirl
21K Followers 9K Following Cohost on JuiceBox Blondies! 🧃 Get the @psf_app to join us! #astros #mlb shoes always by @nardgotsole_htx
AstrosAtoZ @AstrosAtoZ
16K Followers 7K Following Wholesome #Astros content. No matter how much I practice, I will never be better at tennis than the wall.
Htown Wheelhouse™�.. @HtownWheelhouse
8K Followers 5K Following Father, Grandfather | CoHost of @lockedonAstros | @Stros411 | The Game Contributor @ESPN_SWLA I Co-Host Back to the Bullpen Podcast with Mike Stanton @B2Bullpen
CobosQue @CobosQue
11K Followers 1K Following 2012 Rusk St Tues-Sunday 11a-10 Not a bar. Not a restaurant. A vibe. http://www.coboshtx.
Turtle 🏆🏆 @TickingTurtle
3K Followers 4K Following Easily Amused Astros fan-Former LEO-Forensic Chemistry-Independent Party-No DM’s please mainly b/c I never check-🏳️🌈
WASTEPH @wasteph_wes
3K Followers 2K Following Lover of Whiskey. I have a love/hate relationship with Houston sports. I cuss too much, so be it. Some of my content is NSFW. Not a suggested follow
Shoulda Sent Hunter B.. @quallsastros
4K Followers 3K Following Astros unofficial tracker of randomness. Look for my game recaps and Who I Blame lists. Bruh, I’m not Chad Qualls. #ForTheHou #ThinOrangeLine
𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕾𝖍.. @_ShadowStro
3K Followers 3K Following Iron sharpens iron ✍ Astros Aggies Cowboys Rockets Canes *AA saved my life* Don't do Fentanyl 🧐
Space City Sports @LiveSCS
12K Followers 2K Following The Astros have beaten your favorite team too many times to count. 2X Champs. THIS IS A FAN PAGE. I’m just trolling, don’t take it personally.
longhorndave @longhorndave
6K Followers 7K Following Longhorns, Astros, Elvis, Denver teams🤘🇺🇸⚾️🏈🏒🏃💪🏋🍺🥃☕️🚀🛰👨🚀 @lhd_on_sports, @Yelp, ISTP, Married, #Followback, DM for friends only
Bregman’s Wheelbarr.. @newguymeltz
3K Followers 1K Following 2017/2022 Champs America’s DYNASTY! Rockets,Jets, Devils TERPS. Bruce Springsteen nut. Jon Heyman once wrote an article about me. Not affiliated w Alex Bregman
Dr AssBurger @DeeZnuts4funS
1K Followers 658 Following Twitter is the monument to the stupidity of man - Gen George S Patton. Proud Stroud Boy
🤘🏻That Astros/L.. @cpenny81
3K Followers 4K Following Christian, Astros TWO TIME World Series Champions. See you in 2024. Your BIG 12 CHAMPION TEXAS LONGHORNS! SEC BOUND! The Golden Age continues. 🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼
Larry FooteSack @atxhobogrl
4K Followers 1K Following Paying bums to stand in line for ducats at Whataburger since 2003. #TRNDenMother #CookieBitch
Houston Astros 🇫�.. @AstrosFrance
3K Followers 1K Following ⚾️ French fan account of your 2017, 2022 #Worldseries champions - 🧑🚀#relentless
derek guy @dieworkwear
844K Followers 963 Following Menswear writer. Editor at @putthison. Creator of @RLGoesHard. Bylines at The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Financial Times, Esquire, and Mr. Porter
The Lectern Guy🇺�.. @lecternleader
62K Followers 9K Following The Lectern Guy, Podium Guy, Via Getty. Can fold a fitted sheet, gentleman in the streets, silly goose in the tweets.
Hal Steinbrenner’s .. @HalcheckbookRBW
3K Followers 3K Following Hal Steinbrenner stop being cheap. Joe Douglas Defender. Mostly trolling, but some occasionally intelligent thoughts. Blocked By Rudy Giuliani
Stealymann @StealyMann
776 Followers 564 Following @GetAlternative’s Businessman - s’go mets/s’go devils/s’go ravens - he/him @RichardStaff’s Goomar/Life Partner
Lindsey Hill @lindseyhillll
3K Followers 310 Following
Tourons Of Yellowston.. @touronsofynp
783 Followers 1 Following Tourist + Moron = Touron!! I spend a lot of time in both Yellowstone & the Tetons, & it never ceases to AMAZE me how stupid people are! (What NOT to do!!!!)
Mia @_CryMiaRiver
48K Followers 3K Following Researcher for Environmental Progress | Author of The WPATH Files
Alex Strenger @TheAlexStrenger
14K Followers 2K Following Small business owner. Entertainer. Hosts “Convos On The Pedicab”.
Chris Langan @RealChrisLangan
67K Followers 29 Following Absolute Truth on tap 24/7/365 CTMU Videos: https://t.co/BunvEb1elD https://t.co/yaBMHRyMs0 https://t.co/V1KBwbIHyE https://t.co/BVOcGkT5bd
Yilin @ The Lantern a.. @yilinwriter
13K Followers 2K Following Writer. Poet. Editor and Translator, The Lantern and the Night Moths (@invisibooks 2024). @ClarionWest'21. aspec 🏳️🌈
Greg Egan @gregeganSF
23K Followers 316 Following SF writer / computer programmer Latest novel: MORPHOTROPHIC Latest collection: SLEEP AND THE SOUL Web site: https://t.co/yeU5bLA3mx Also: @[email protected]
Jon Del Arroz @jondelarroz
8K Followers 5K Following The Leading Hispanic Voice In #ScienceFiction. Bestselling Author. Newsletter: https://t.co/BoZrpziIol Youtube: https://t.co/o3CRncc6WD
Fandom Pulse @fandompulse
1K Followers 51 Following We are the Fandom Pulse. Our mission: to take back what we love from those who would destroy us. https://t.co/TaSy4rkd5C
Alex Nichols @Lowenaffchen
52K Followers 2K Following the dwarfing and leveling of the european man @WFYMradio @FortuneKit00
Janiesaysyay @janiesaysyay
9K Followers 8K Following Corporate research My conspiracy theory: It Came From a Lab Advance search #snakes or #pandemicplaylist and @Janiesaysyay
AndyTheScot_Texas @Illuminawti
1K Followers 1K Following Legal immigrant - US citizen. Iraq veteran (PSD), pro-2A and USA. Qualified sneak reaper, may be cranky and impolite. Not a Jew but pro-Israel. GenXer - FAFO.
Jon du Toit @jondutoit
11K Followers 520 Following writer, director: https://t.co/ZWx89WHnrq | music: @electrumfire
Kletus 🤍✝️🇺.. @kommissarkletus
2K Followers 992 Following ⚡ Christ is King. 🤍 ✝️ Nationalist. Licentiousness is not Liberty. 🏴🇩🇪🇮🇹 ⚡
Open Source Stupidity.. @IRHotTakes
14K Followers 2K Following Student of political science. Maker of bad life decisions. Sometimes rambles about nerd shit. All tweets my own, but sometimes I wish otherwise.
Zefram Marks @ZeframM
955 Followers 699 Following Engineer/Scientist in semiconductor industry. YIMBY. Democrat. He/him.
Patrick Kerby @Patrickkerby58
6K Followers 1K Following Liberty is the way. @RonPaul delegate in 2008/2012 creator of https://t.co/wMyKOcUWZ4
Alan Cole @AlanMCole
28K Followers 1K Following International and Federal Taxes @taxfoundation High Priest of #DBCFT Twitter
Defiant L’s @DefiantLs
1.0M Followers 92 Following Some Are Defiant • Most Are Hypocrites • DM Submissions
🅱🅸🆃 🅾🅵.. @TheSDPadresFan
55K Followers 510 Following
R A W S A L E R T S @rawsalerts
968K Followers 2K Following RawsAlerts is your go-to source for fast and accurate news coverage, specializing in groundbreaking events across the USA. Follow @Rawsglobal for world news
Tacticon Armament @TacticonDotCom
20K Followers 99 Following "Value Over Profit" Veteran Owned and Operated Just Flippin and Floppin
Chef Reactions @ChefReactions
329K Followers 583 Following Extra Salty | Side of Sarcasm *BS allergy* that annoying, monotone chef from TikTok
🌴 Josh Lekach 🌴 @JoshLekach
48K Followers 218 Following I AM THE HOST OF WRONG OPINION. EBOOKS AND SHOW LINKS BELOW.
Context Hunter @githii
288K Followers 637 Following Context Hunter. Uncovering the complete story, one detail at a time.
Robotbeat🗽 ➐ @Robotbeat
8K Followers 3K Following “Only we are Earthseed. And the destiny of Earthseed is to take root among the stars.” —Octavia Butler (tweets don't reflect employer policy)
Altitude 💫 @alledrive
866 Followers 4K Following
Scribbles @Scribbles646
2K Followers 1K Following Technical writer, Economist The Mars Society, Technology, Nature, Science, Energy
Jon @Point_of_Gold
586 Followers 491 Following NewSpace, Mars, EV's, NeuroLink, AI, Climate, Alternative Energy... Anything but Crypto!
ynskirie💎 @ynskirie
2K Followers 3K Following I'm an Artist on SuperRare💎 based in Tokyo, Japan.🇯🇵 https://t.co/ibFZrH3c0X
imaginativeone.eth �.. @imaginative_one
402 Followers 838 Following
Jordyn ''Squidoku'' P.. @Squidoku_
196 Followers 295 Following xe/xem/xyr, pi/pem/per. Actual shark IRL, age 26. USA Sudoku Team '22-23. Splatoon 3 commentator, player on @SquidEst_Spl. Icon + header by @theBreeoche.
Adam Townsend @adamscrabble
103K Followers 3K Following Investor. Extreme salesman. Philanthropy, politics and policy
alias Terry Frisk @TexanAlex
301 Followers 619 Following Houstonian living his best Texpat life in ChiBeria. Follow for Astros tweets and potent potables. “F@$# off, Alex!” - Justin Verlander
Dusty’s Lessons of .. @DustyLessons
1K Followers 793 Following Burner acct of @quallsastros Strictly parody and satire for the baseball beloved
Jonathan Longoria @Longo_19
177 Followers 553 Following
Mud_On_My_Boots @Mud_On_Boots
112 Followers 443 Following I am not afraid to fail. I am afraid of not being prepared.
alexis alvarez @alvarezzalexiss
4K Followers 686 Following prev: @hokiesfb 🦃 • @cfbplayoff 🏆 • @astros 🤘currently: @raiders ☠️ #smsports
Our Houston Astros need to win in the states… They aren’t going to Mexico anymore this szn! #Relentless
@dwontlose U know what I’m not sure i Need to find out now. Never had it n now I’m intrigued. I’ve been wantin fish n chips after watching Ted Lasso so this is my sign.
@ErinAstrosFan I am scared for any child that these two would produce.
@longhorndave It's just a number, now, if he starts wearing his back pocket inside-out...
@ErinAstrosFan Fell out of a tree. It was in my old backyard. I'd like to think it broke a bone and my dog put it out of its misery. I just made that last part up so it's less horrifying, but it really did fall out of a tree. Just not sure it broke a bone. I let my dog out then saw. 😬
@ErinAstrosFan More importantly, how did a chipmunk get into your house? I bet your dog freaked out?!
Astros Pitchers First Inning Futility Tracker Runs given up: 35 Brown: 15 France: 7 Heaney: 5 Arrighetti: 4 Blanco: 4
Astros Pitchers First Inning Futility Tracker Runs given up: 32 Brown: 12 France: 7 Heaney: 5 Arrighetti: 4 Blanco: 4
@BlerdyOtaku i miss reading so much. i cannot wait until im finished with school
@BlerdyOtaku The way I would’ve whipped out my @goodreads application and ran through the Want To Read list like a tomb raider.
We hollered at the @CleGuardians and they threw a ball up. It ricocheted off my hand and she caught it.
I’m gonna put this stupid game on and give Hunter Brown another opportunity to crush my soul.
@lindseyhillll Simply wild with all the knowledge of the miscreants and nasty people professional baseball teams have given second chances to that people can’t figure out just how bad what he did was that not a god damn team will touch a player who was a cy young whenlast pitched a full season
The mommy with her baby. This couple should not be allowed to procreate.
Julia, I legit thought that was code for “Don’t let Gurriel down.” I was like holy pressure! 😂
Astros GM Dana Brown tells Joey Loperfido: “Don’t let Jersey down.” Both guys from New Jersey.
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