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Tweets13K
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Followers4K
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Following473
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Likes172K
Glad I was given the Pumpkin Pie assignment for Friendsgiving so I didn’t go with my instinct and bring a judgemental family member and an acoustic guitar.
While waiting for the light to turn green at a busy 4-way intersection, I watched a man walk into the road to share a cheeseburger with a dog in the back of a strangers truck and hope they have a good week.
Apple Music playlists are like *shuffle all* here’s Mr. Brightside followed by part 2 of the Wrath of the Khans podcast
we need to show some empathy and understanding to our disappointed brothers and sisters in sauron’s orc army
I assume many people softly whisper “you’re tearing me apart” with a Tommy Wiseau accent while scrolling through social media because we’re collectively losing our minds.
[remembering what I learned in school about the composition of a formal letter to a group or organization] *writes* For WHOM the bell tolls, I am concerned periodt
Considering TN is historically an absurdly red state, it’s a small relief that the only signs supporting a predator on my street are for the hockey team.
hot girl: do u wanna go back to my place me: *just learned reverse psychology* no 😎
Keep an eye on your friend who ‘stays out of politics’ and hasn’t read anything but young adult fiction in 10 years. They won’t know who to trust after qanon implodes and their sketchy personal trainer starts a cult.
Anaesthetist: count backwards from 100 Me: 100..99..98 Me: ..3..2..1...now what? Anaesthetist *muffled* you have to find me
Disney Executive: We need our own version of a superhero spinoff franchise based on a classic character. Any ideas? Writer: *scrolling through fonts keyboard* I- uh..
Pulling up in front of my house during a thunderstorm as the song ‘dark days’ by local natives fades in on the radio and a wave of nostalgia washes over with the painful reminder of everyone saying “ugh, 2016 sucks” while simultaneously catching Pokémon at concerts.
“What about whataboutism” I shouted after hurling a bale of hay at a scarecrow.
Weird flex, guy exercising with a sledgehammer at the park.
I just heard a guy outside of a restaurant with no mask say “covid is actually bad for your body, it’s like smoking a cigarette, it won’t kill you but it’s still bad” and the other guy said “that’s an interesting comparisment” 🥴
In these uncertain times, it’s still highly probable there’s a spider behind your bookshelf.
“It appears you underestimated the bravery of a man in flip flops,” I say out loud to the dead wasp in the trash can that chased me inside and across the house despite being smaller than my pinky.
A tricked out Infiniti coupe just zoomed away after I crossed the street and I involuntarily made an irritated Wookie noise to mock the tone of its exhaust.
No one is more certain about the direction of their life than a brunch drunk tourist on an electric scooter.
Dan Duvall @DanDuvallComedy
30K Followers 2K Following Standup Comic and former guy who uses Twitter
Brian Gaar @briangaar
72K Followers 2K Following https://t.co/z1EDZmqdBo Bluesky: https://t.co/XkLVhTtCfv Read my stuff at: https://t.co/e9CGIwhVgN
Ted Travelstead @trumpetcake
43K Followers 4K Following I'm not everyone's cup of teeth. https://t.co/97Pa1xYSHh
Shane @shanethevein
16K Followers 3K Following I don't care about politics, especially yours. Padres fan. Crodie lover. I block trolls. Born in Hawaii, lives in Texas via Cali, Arizona, and Baltimore.
Colin Gubbins @RitleySammich
11K Followers 7K Following Ministry of Ungentlemanly & Irregular Warfare - cardboard sports cards - #NAFO - NoleNation -
Amanda @Manda_like_wine
39K Followers 902 Following I do a lot of laundry. contact:mancinowilliams at gmail
Forever° @Forever185329
53 Followers 4K Following
Mistress alexia @Mistres2201476
164 Followers 404 Following I’m very picky on who I take on as My actual submissive/slave I do teach and train subs though try me for hot 🥵 tasks
R B @rajatanilbehl
0 Followers 108 Following
Riley @rleelizaa
2K Followers 4K Following Sometimes optimistic, mostly depressed. Healthcare worker/CNA. Total empath. Gemini. Just a complicated person trying to chill. I really don't DM. No offense.
Elizabeth J-Young @ejyoung2
124 Followers 163 Following Associate Professor of Communication at UMW interested in health comm & media effects; also a teacher/wife/mother/sister/cat owner/consumer of too much tv
The Tennessee Holler @TheTNHoller
329K Followers 122K Following ALWAYS YELL THE TRUTH. Lifting up voices and shining a light on injustices in Tennessee. (@thetnholler on Blue Sky)
TAYLOR @NASTYBOYTATER
745 Followers 1K Following
баран @U4urgSWjbJ9hNum
168 Followers 2K Following
KM @Ktmolson
16 Followers 376 Following
Lexi Anne Garza @LexiAnneGarza2
2K Followers 173 Following for bookings@MotleyModels Instagram: Lexi_Anne https://t.co/ScR5YLXZF6
Dank Coins 🚀 @dankcoins
8K Followers 7K Following Dank Coins Only. $MTRD $BTC $ETH #Decentralization
Brad Batt for Tenness... @bradbatt
31K Followers 23K Following Running for TN State House (D6) to end the grocery tax, raise wages, fund our public schools, and take down these Flock cameras!!
Trish Zornio @trish_zornio
76K Followers 65K Following Scientist | lecturer | writer | columnist @ColoradoSun ☀️ | mountaineer | Fmr U.S. Senate cand | Legacy verified; refuse $8 ransom. S/H. Views my own
Peter Mossfield @PeterMossfield
8K Followers 6K Following Degen investor trying to get rich off meme coins, sportsbetting and blackjack. free discord ⬇️
Luke Fegenbush @LukeFegenbush
436 Followers 428 Following Comedian. Loser. If anyone knows where to find those Caprisun gusher snacks they made for two months in the early 2000s hmu
Navyvetbolt81 @navyvetbolt81
11K Followers 8K Following Opinions are my own and not necessarily those of my employer. Former navy,current LE. #veteransagainstrump #blackhornets #Backthetrueblue🖕trump, wear a mask
Wisdom Rocks @GetWisdomDude
36K Followers 36K Following Careful. You won't want to get crushed by those Knuckle dragging Troglodytes who rant against fairness & truth. Let's dance. Threads ➡️ @GetWisdomDude1
Erik B @erikbransteen
26K Followers 22K Following Comic, Ostrich Life Coach. Thumbtack Enthusiast, Extreme Tooth Flosser Instagram UnInfluencer. Sirius XM, CBS, ABC. Listen to my LE2B Podcast
Steve @notWigCannon
233 Followers 158 Following
Nour Negm @NourNeg86337547
291 Followers 4K Following Free IELTS training. Technical Content Interviewer Teacher Interviewer Credentials: CELTA, FELT, TESOL, TOT, TKT Conferences: NileTESOL, IPAWL, & ILACE
iJoey @jumpdashark
10K Followers 5K Following I live in a world of rainbows & butterflies, unicorns & fairy dust. https://t.co/bEfZsQsJjg
Ginger Snapped ❤ @katy_fit
36K Followers 14K Following Martha Stewart & Erin Andrews Trapped in Anna Nicole's Body. 4th grade Presidential Physical Fitness Award Winner.
Koko B. Ware @londonjohnnyo
109 Followers 862 Following
Michael Lartey @Michael27234856
31 Followers 958 Following
Jacked Up Podcast @JackedUpPod
1K Followers 189 Following The world is all jacked up. @OVLH is not here to make you feel any better about it. ideas/comments/questions/insults: [email protected]
LisMc @LisMc5
11K Followers 5K Following Baudelaire & a fireside nightcap is a dream I had once https://t.co/TAVhTs2hKf
Shauna @Shauna90535294
140 Followers 545 Following Proud mom to two and grandma to three, domestic goddess. Into thrift stores, Netflix, reading, chilling with my furface Archie. Irregular tweeter.
Zach Boychuk🐍 @ZachBoychuk
757K Followers 644K Following 🏒Pro Hockey Player & Part time Meme/NFT Trader 🚀 🌌| (not financial advice) 📈🚀#Bitcoin, Ethereum, Solana
Aadam Suleiman kooshi... @Aadam0654427224
224 Followers 6K Following
Eric Toms @tomsfunny
860 Followers 2K Following Actor, Writer, Filmmaker, Podcaster Night of Shorts Night co-creator Nichols Fellow Lover of movies and punk rock
Foyzul Ahmedfoyzul9 @FoyzulAhmed12
11 Followers 579 Following
Tyler Tolbert @TylerTolbert14
2 Followers 44 Following just looking for a relationship tbh but no bullshit and drama.
Fem Zeppelin @FemZeppelin
1K Followers 1K Following Fem Zeppelin -All female Led Zeppelin Tribute Band!!
Lacey Palacio @LaceyPalacio1
83 Followers 476 Following Am open minded, humble, mature, free spirited and passionate person who loves to laugh and enjoys life to its fullest
MS @burntmycrust
7 Followers 111 Following
Dan Duvall @DanDuvallComedy
30K Followers 2K Following Standup Comic and former guy who uses Twitter
Brian Gaar @briangaar
72K Followers 2K Following https://t.co/z1EDZmqdBo Bluesky: https://t.co/XkLVhTtCfv Read my stuff at: https://t.co/e9CGIwhVgN
Ted Travelstead @trumpetcake
43K Followers 4K Following I'm not everyone's cup of teeth. https://t.co/97Pa1xYSHh
Bizarre Lazar @BizarreLazar
47K Followers 12K Following Internet Guy | Rubber of elbows | Eater of sandwiches | Starter of slow claps
chelsea anét @chelseaanet
19K Followers 332 Following writer, artist, altered state of consciousness, out of body enthusiast
Shane @shanethevein
16K Followers 3K Following I don't care about politics, especially yours. Padres fan. Crodie lover. I block trolls. Born in Hawaii, lives in Texas via Cali, Arizona, and Baltimore.
Colin Gubbins @RitleySammich
11K Followers 7K Following Ministry of Ungentlemanly & Irregular Warfare - cardboard sports cards - #NAFO - NoleNation -
Amanda @Manda_like_wine
39K Followers 902 Following I do a lot of laundry. contact:mancinowilliams at gmail
Alex Jones @RealAlexJones
4.4M Followers 1K Following ғɪɴᴅ ᴍʏ ɴᴇᴡ sʜᴏᴡ + ʙʀᴇᴀᴋɪɴɢ ᴜᴘᴅᴀᴛᴇs https://t.co/VVGHDLfQup sᴜᴘᴘᴏʀᴛ ᴏᴜʀ sᴘᴏɴsᴏʀs: https://t.co/52FoF6maWt & https://t.co/WL950M9tUr @AJNlive
Massimo @Rainmaker1973
4.4M Followers 172 Following Engineer. Selecting and curating pictures and videos trying to awaken your sense of wonder since 2014. Science, tech, art, weather, space, the unusual around us
Adam Schefter @AdamSchefter
11.8M Followers 4K Following ESPN Senior NFL Insider. Host of the Adam Schefter Podcast https://t.co/Rrty23Lfn7
Triple R @RaviRRana
28K Followers 3K Following Cheerful dreamer | Solan, Himachal 🌄 Living in the moment • Local roots, bigger dreams Football • Community • Good vibes only It’s okay to not be okay.
Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc
1.3M Followers 320 Following Join my private healing community @selfhealerscirc 👇🏼
Elizabeth J-Young @ejyoung2
124 Followers 163 Following Associate Professor of Communication at UMW interested in health comm & media effects; also a teacher/wife/mother/sister/cat owner/consumer of too much tv
The Tennessee Holler @TheTNHoller
329K Followers 122K Following ALWAYS YELL THE TRUTH. Lifting up voices and shining a light on injustices in Tennessee. (@thetnholler on Blue Sky)
ali @OnlineAlison
21K Followers 2K Following cohost of @webcrawlerspod. contact me: [email protected]. IG ALIBABY90.
Will Sennett @Senn_Spud
120K Followers 1K Following @CloserLookPod the warrior in the garden. proverbs twenty one thirty one the horse is made ready for the day of battle
Joe Biden @JoeBiden
37.8M Followers 48 Following Husband to @DrBiden, proud father, grandfather, and great grandfather.
jon drake @DrakeGatsby
100K Followers 2K Following I only take up a little of the collapsing space. 1/2 of @blastzonepod
Dave Weasel @DaveWeasel
459K Followers 14K Following 5x Billboard comedy chart topper. slightly more active on IG: daveweasel @valleyboyspod "verified since September 2016" don't come at me
Brad Batt for Tenness... @bradbatt
31K Followers 23K Following Running for TN State House (D6) to end the grocery tax, raise wages, fund our public schools, and take down these Flock cameras!!
Trish Zornio @trish_zornio
76K Followers 65K Following Scientist | lecturer | writer | columnist @ColoradoSun ☀️ | mountaineer | Fmr U.S. Senate cand | Legacy verified; refuse $8 ransom. S/H. Views my own
Peter Mossfield @PeterMossfield
8K Followers 6K Following Degen investor trying to get rich off meme coins, sportsbetting and blackjack. free discord ⬇️
Luke Fegenbush @LukeFegenbush
436 Followers 428 Following Comedian. Loser. If anyone knows where to find those Caprisun gusher snacks they made for two months in the early 2000s hmu
Wisdom Rocks @GetWisdomDude
36K Followers 36K Following Careful. You won't want to get crushed by those Knuckle dragging Troglodytes who rant against fairness & truth. Let's dance. Threads ➡️ @GetWisdomDude1
Erik B @erikbransteen
26K Followers 22K Following Comic, Ostrich Life Coach. Thumbtack Enthusiast, Extreme Tooth Flosser Instagram UnInfluencer. Sirius XM, CBS, ABC. Listen to my LE2B Podcast
🤙🏻soso🤙🏻 @sophiebuddle
8K Followers 1K Following juno award, the tonight show, late late show, Comedy Central, ur mom
Jakz @iamjakz
2K Followers 521 Following Photographer | Videographer | Emmy Award Winner. Same handle on all socials - Friend of Clumsy the Crow. Birds are my favorite people. @iamjakz on all socials.
Ken Klippenstein @kenklippenstein
568K Followers 4K Following Independent journalist. Join my newsletter: https://t.co/NnMpNEOP2K👈 Signal: 202-510-1268
Steve @notWigCannon
233 Followers 158 Following
LaytesAgain @LaytesAgain
984 Followers 2K Following Yes, my friend. Standup. Host of the 3:51am pod. Reluctant lawyer.
Stanklin Blowsevelt @d_hammerhugs
412 Followers 734 Following The James Earl Jones of scrawny white guys. Love life| Love living | Love liver
Scott Page @iamscottpage
362K Followers 325K Following Musician, Technologist and Entrepreneur Saxophonist for Pink Floyd, Supertramp and Toto.
KennyAronoff @AronoffOFFICIAL
154K Followers 150K Following #Drummer #Musician #sessiondrummer #recordingstudio #producer https://t.co/ao9DAfMW1R https://t.co/S39ds21RGc #Author #speaker
Dad In A Bear Suit @dadinabearsuit
8K Followers 7K Following Father, husband, part time hit man. Don’t laugh your mom might be in here with me.
Teewee @Chloestylo
12K Followers 3K Following You've all been given top clearance to read my tweets. 🇺🇸 .. Patriot .. ❤ MAGA .. 🇺🇸
lucid chrome @LucidChrome
98 Followers 378 Following
Lovable Misanthrope @LaurelleMartin
20K Followers 18K Following likes: Netflix, naps, tarot cards and talking to the dead.
RAWAudioProductions @RAWAudioProd
50 Followers 67 Following Tracking, editing, mixing and mastering || Nashville, TN || For business inquiries contact [email protected]donni's darker side @DonniDarker
340 Followers 168 Following @donni's idiot child alter ego prodigal moon word player
































