Bizarre Lazar @BizarreLazar
Internet Guy | Rubber of elbows | Eater of sandwiches | Starter of slow claps Az Joined March 2009-
Tweets23K
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Followers54K
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Following15K
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Likes137K
Bizarre Lazar retweeted
If you put back the $9.34 chicken to grab the $8.87 pack then you don’t need to worry about Biden’s new capital gains taxes.
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‘Canción del mariachi’ and it’s not even close
‘Canción del mariachi’ and it’s not even close https://t.co/4VVsV7rgFm
Is this door white with blue stripes or blue with white stripes?
Finally a drawer for my patience
*salesman slaps roof of twitter* you wouldn’t believe how much pussy you can fit in bio
Me as a kid: man I can’t wait to be an adult Me as an adult: man how expensive are paper towels
Bizarre Lazar retweeted
After 6 weeks, $140 in supplies, and daily watering, we’re only three to four weeks away from enjoying a single 25¢ vegetable from our garden.
Not gonna lie this is pretty depressing
I’ll never understand how stealing state secrets and classified documents doesn’t immediately disqualify you from being President
I went to endless shrimp at red lobster to do my part in helping them lose money and now my blood hurts 10/10 do not recommend
New Alabama daycare center just dropped
My daughters Girl Scout Troop planned a big trip this year. $1200 per person for 3 days not including airfare. A parent also needs to join. With airfare for 2 its $3k. Is this normal for Scouts? Can people actually afford to do this or does everyone just let their kids down?
If you say every single election is the most important election of our lifetime it loses all meaning. Just stop. We get it.
This is how I’m parking if I ever work at a bank
You know what doesn’t need a Black Friday deal? Love.
What if the Black Friday deal was the friends we made along the way? Like that guy we’re gonna trample to death to save $80 on a shitty tv. He will be missed.
Bizarre Lazar retweeted
You should always be kind and understanding to grocery staff. But especially more so today. Last minute pre-holiday rush is insane. If you think you’re stressed imagine how they’re feeling. Be patient. Be understanding. Most of all, don’t be a dick.
Pies all ready to go in to oven for tomorrow. The house is about to smell the best it will all year.
Smoking a bird for thanksgiving. I’ll resort to turkey if the neighbors peacock guy falls through.
I’m just now learning some people make chili without beans? Is that even chili?
I’m just now learning some people make chili without beans? Is that even chili?
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@StarwortTC @BizarreLazar i think the blue paint on the floor conclusively proves that it's a white door with blue stripes
@Babybonnieee the american dad and cleveland brown songs are a different level
@Babybonnieee But I know something about you....
How y’all look in black? 🤷🏼♀️
How y’all look in black?
Happy Friday from your favorite blonde 💕
@BizarreLazar Somebody got distracted and didn't finish painting it
@BizarreLazar Trick question. There are no stripes. It is two tone 🙃
Happy 29th birthday to me 💖
@BizarreLazar @fuckyouiquit This is the drawer where I keep all my fucks, there's always room left over.
@BizarreLazar @fuckyouiquit You mean the spaghetti drawer?
@BizarreLazar @fuckyouiquit That's a huge Pez dispenser.
@BizarreLazar I've figured out what to put in the drawer!
This is where I would keep my asparagus if I had any 😞
Finally a drawer for my patience
@elonmusk @zerohedge Why not make your case when given the opportunity?
Good morning! Happy Easter weekend y’all 💖
@BenZeisloft The hypocrisy of a Christian Nationalist, to demand America choose Christianity as its religion when America is a secular state an on top of that there are other major religions. The arrogance of the Christian nationalist is that if any other religion were demanding America be…
@dklflsgsd @BizarreLazar if i buy 97¢ paper towels, im going to end up needing more paper towels to wipe something than i would of more expensive ones. so i buy way more of those - so begins the cycle family dollar brand paper towels are pretty solid for the price tho
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