JoePendleton78 @JPendleton78

I start every morning with these. I also usually add “Kale and leafy greens will sustain me” and “My boss is a lovely person,” but do what works for you. 😉💕

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VanCityIttyBitty @IttyVan

8 years ago

I have a masters degree but please, take my boobs seriously.

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She Plays Loud @ShePlaysLoud

8 years ago

We are all just looking for someone who can see us.

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poletic kate @poetickate

8 years ago

my parents always told me to be the sex position you want to see in the world, so that’s why i became a missionary

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poletic kate @poetickate

8 years ago

tweet others the way you would want to be tweeted

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JoePendleton78 @JPendleton78

8 years ago

@jctwritesstuff Yummy!

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JoePendleton78 @JPendleton78

8 years ago

@SarahPribis What do you want? Just name it and it’s yours. Literally!

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JoePendleton78 @JPendleton78

8 years ago

Believe me, I disappointed myself long before I disappointed you.

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Sarah Pribis @SarahPribis

8 years ago

Sometimes I think about my ex and I’m like, “How did I settle for the honeydew of men? I could have at least chosen a cantaloupe.”

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Best of Nextdoor 🏡 @bestofnextdoor

8 years ago

Meanwhile in Seattle...

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❤️‍🔥Sardonic Tart❤️‍🔥 @SardonicTart

8 years ago

I don't know exactly what I want out of life but I'm fairly certain it isn't this.

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Summers Eve @troutsbastard

8 years ago

I thought twitter might make me less of an asshole in real life. That was a bad plan.

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Summers Eve @troutsbastard

8 years ago

If you can enrage your neighbor just by being outside in your yard, that’s when you know you’ve won.

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Summers Eve @troutsbastard

8 years ago

Every morning I see I’ve lost followers because of my night tweets. All I can say is you’re going to be sorry when you miss out on the tweet I’m planning for easter 2019.