Talia Argondezzi @TaliaArgondezzi
writing/English professor. satire: McSweeney's, New Yorker Shouts, Points in Case, Belladonna, Slackjaw. my book! https://t.co/2GIjISyJiO… taliaargondezzi.com Joined November 2020-
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you think you're so smart, don't you? well I wasn't going to say Let me know what works. You can't pigeonhole me, predictive AI! I'm a unique unpredictable creative human individual! With an unfathomable capacity for self-expression I was going to say Looking forward to it
Oh, you don’t have a longtime rival you constantly compare yourself to even though they never give one single thought to you? Then how do you keep track of your inadequacies?
Toni Morrison: If there's a book that you want to read, but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it. Publishers: Please name 8 bestsellers from the past 6 months that are exactly like your book.
can you imagine getting $10 AND second prize in a beauty contest? actual money on top of that validation? I would die
“orphan sock”? the matching sock was its parent??
Multitasking in the hustle economy
I was honored to co-write this new humor piece with my hilarious colleague Margie Connor, her first published article. It's about how blind we humans are to our pets', uh, quirks. thebelladonnacomedy.com/dont-worry-my-…
I have some new humor out today, in the great @SlackjawHumor! medium.com/slackjaw/a-dat…
mutuals - anybody else going to the erma writing workshop this week? message me! I'd love to meet in RL and prove to you that this nerdy awkwardness is not just my social media persona it's also REAL
Talia Argondezzi retweeted
Walking the dogs in the neighborhood Easter morning and I hear a lady loudly telling her family: “It’s early! You’ve got to have faith. You’ve got to believe!” It took me a second to realize she was talking about the Phillies and not Jesus.
My kids believe in the Easter bunny and Santa but they think the Tooth Fairy can't handle all those lost teeth so there must be multiple fairies who each cover their own territory and.... this is just sexism right?
My book is buy one, get one 50% off at Barnes and Noble. You can buy 8 copies for the price of 6. You could also buy The Things They Carried or something and then get my book for half off to cheer you up. barnesandnoble.com/w/lean-the-f-c…
Suburbs reached their logical conclusion and all new construction is now like you can LIVE in the SAME PARKING LOT as the TARGET
No offense to Joe Cocker but “you are so beautiful (to me)” is a messed up thing to say
There should be a word for how you know it’s dumb but you still really want to watch the Oscars and then you start watching the Oscars and realize you don’t actually like watching the Oscars much because of all the reasons you already knew they’re dumb
Spring Break causes my phone so much anxiety. Constant pings like “you can still make it to class if you leave RIGHT NOW! Traffic is LIGHT!!!”
Walking barefoot at an indoor waterpark: ordinary, sane, sanitary, almost pleasant Walking barefoot into the waterpark bathroom: disgusting, horrifying, probably I’m going to die from a disease that hasn’t been discovered yet
Lucy Huber @clhubes
80K Followers 2K Following editor @mcsweeneys Mother of: 👦🏼👶🏼🐈⬛🐈🐠🐌 Writer? Hungry. Tired.
Kristen Mulrooney @missmulrooney
14K Followers 2K Following Editor @The_Belladonnas. Writing in The New Yorker, McSweeneys, Gilmore Girls: The Official Cookbook kristenmmm on Insta
Jennie Egerdie @hijennieblair
4K Followers 2K Following 🇨🇦 Author OH BOTHER + Frog and Toad Are Doing Their Best (@vulture Best of 2021) | Words @newyorkerhumor @mcsweeneys | Rep @LauraMazer | she/they
Audrey Burges @Audrey_Burges
8K Followers 5K Following Author, A HOUSE LIKE AN ACCORDION (2024) & THE MINUSCULE MANSION OF MYRA MALONE (2023); scribbler of humor, flash, & pretty flowers; thinks you're awesome
Miriam Jayaratna @Jayaratnahhh
1K Followers 457 Following clinical psychologist 👂🏻 and writer 😩 | words in @newyorker @mcsweeneys @Reductress @bostonglobe @the_rumpus @realpunknews @identitytheory et al.
sleepiest girl in the.. @v_dcknz
9K Followers 3K Following headlinezzzz @theonion @reductress • Hyperfocus: A Neurodivergent Comedy Show @caveatnyc next show May 12 😇
Kevin Burke @Ke7inBurke
5K Followers 1K Following hey! | headline contributor @theonion @reductress @bwaybeatnews | he/him
Gracie Beaver-Kairis @beaverkairis
2K Followers 2K Following Writer/Introvert/Oregonian. Haha's in: @realpunknews @mcsweeneys @WeeklyHumorist @PointsInCase @SlackjawHumor, etc. She/her. Insta: graciebk.writes
meg✨✨ @mjhorgss
2K Followers 980 Following copywriter, humor writer, crier | words in @reductress @realpunknews @realoverheardla
Weekly Humorist @WeeklyHumorist
9K Followers 7K Following The Humor Magazine. The Standard In American Immaturity. Editor-in-Chief @MartyDundics @TheWebbyAwards Nominated 🏆Buy print or digital issues, subscribe today!
Carlos Greaves @shadesofgreaves
5K Followers 2K Following Engineer. Writer. Friend | Author of Spoilers: Essays That Might Ruin Your Favorite Hollywood Movies
Blayr 🌻 @BlayrAustin
9K Followers 6K Following ‘Writer’ | Teacher @TheSecondCity | Not a serious person 🥸 | Distinguished Tweeter 🐦 | My classes: Writing Sadness Through Humor, Funny Essay ✏️
K.E. Flann @kathyflann
4K Followers 3K Following Writer, 4 books, Words @washingtonpost @Slate @bostonglobe @mcsweeneys @WeeklyHumorist @The_Belladonnas @PointsinCase Rep'd by @millercallihan #binders HWA SFWA
Pastrami Mommy @Ewelannawhite
4K Followers 4K Following a half-sour pickle | *ctor, vo artist and comedy writer | contributor @realpunknews @harddrivemag @bwaybeatnews
Luke Burns @LukeVBurns
2K Followers 1K Following Gonna be posting way less on here! Check out my site for contact info, etc. Writing funny stuff/weird stuff. New Yorker, McSweeney's. https://t.co/yNKx4MWxzD // he/him
Lillian Stone @originalspinstr
8K Followers 4K Following culture writer // author: EVERYBODY’S FAVORITE, out now from @deystreet 💋 @wgaeast shrew 👊
Meg Reid @meg_it_happen
809 Followers 1K Following Contributor @theonion @reductress @mcsweeneys @pointsincase @the_belladonnas @weeklyhumorist @endofbench A pretty impossible lady to be with. she/her
Leslie Ylinen @lkylinen
998 Followers 671 Following
chase @_chase_____
12K Followers 1K Following girl writer | associate editor @reductress | writing in @newyorkerhumor @mcsweeneys | https://t.co/ywCjXok4HX | she/her
Kate Herzlin @KateHerzlin
1K Followers 2K Following she/her/hers. writer, feminist killjoy, Bernadette Peters. words in @mcsweeneys @The_Belladonnas @PointsinCase @WeeklyHumorist lit rep’d by @agentsaba
Shawn @Una1845764
50 Followers 1K Following I am a lively and cheerful girl who would like to meet a good friend.
Jenny Baumgartner @JenBaums
720 Followers 3K Following Executive Editor, Hachette, bibliophile, Jesus, single mom to DaBaum twins, Love 💗
T.K. Jürgens🖋️�.. @ToomasJurgens
5K Followers 5K Following An ordinary guy from somewhere in Northern #Europe, who likes to play with #words and writes mostly #scifi, but also a bit of #magical #realism and #fantasy.
Professor Driggs @ProfessorDriggs
470 Followers 351 Following Writer for God @ thegoodgodabove, freelance dentist
Jane Demarest @drawjanedraw
70 Followers 119 Following ( they/them) illustrator based in philly ig @ little.boy.bluee email: [email protected]
Dr. Michelle Lynn Kah.. @MichelleLKahn
2K Followers 2K Following Historian @urichmond | Germany, migration, racism, far-right extremism, sexuality | book on Turkish-German migration 2024 | researching transatlantic neo-Nazism
Rebecca Lortie @beccalortie
304 Followers 142 Following semi-functioning generalist: studying english. consuming comedy. working carpentry. parenting pets.
EMMA’S Mom! @Juli_SawyerWood
363 Followers 2K Following Mom to Hunter, Emma, & Tom & bonus mom to Shelbie & Bruen. Nan to Simone! 🥰❤️ #VeryTiredTeacher Hog fan for life! #WoooPig #GoHogs
Annmarie Kelly-Harbau.. @annmariek_h
2K Followers 4K Following Teacher. Mom. Friend to dogs. Host: WILD PRECIOUS LIFE. Author: HERE BE DRAGONS. I always talk to strangers.
Joe Tilleli @sorrywrongjoe
1K Followers 3K Following co-founder & editor at @PaletteSwapMag • gaming & tech editor at @ItsTheInventory | @KinjaDeals • formerly @HardDriveMag • (He/Him)
Tania A. Marron🇺�.. @TaniaAMarron
363 Followers 917 Following #Writer based in London. Short stories about being a Ukrainian, a woman, an involuntary nomad (fck russia), voluntary glad, a cat mom, and a therapy regular.
john hayes @jiggytiggy703
21 Followers 34 Following
Bayou Wolf Press @BayouWolf3
7K Followers 7K Following Bayou Wolf Press - Bringing you books with freckles and glasses. Husband/wife team making indie books! #WritingCommunity #publishing #indiebooks #literature
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40 Followers 1K Following Awesome, you can earn 500-5000 usdt every day here, join now telegram:https://t.co/KRFuOhxpGE
Lauren Theresa 🥏 @ImLaurenTheresa
3K Followers 2K Following she/her • divergent • writer • witch • mom • trauma therapist • author ALL THE TIMES… & LOST THINGS • co-eic @icebreakers_lit • sorcery @persephone_lit🌱🕳️🔦🔮
Vanisha Sukdeo @VanishaSukdeo
1K Followers 2K Following B.A., LL.B., LL.M., Ph.D., lawyer, author of 4 books, Adjunct Professor at Osgoode Hall Law School. Focus on corporate law, workers' rights, and climate change.
Andy Adams 📸 @FlakPhoto
130K Followers 71K Following Hi! I’m a curator + writer in Madison, Wisconsin, USA. I run FlakPhoto Projects, a community hub focused on conversations about photography and visual culture.
Matt Oates @MattOatesWrites
249 Followers 3K Following Voted “most likely to move to DC, tire of practicing law, and start writing in his 30s” by his grade school class.
pakorn Davis @AlexDavis18928
64 Followers 122 Following Civil engineering official service to build a house 🏘️ construction bridge.. rain way renovation homes
Nate Armbruster @natecomedy
3K Followers 2K Following I like to write jokes. And tell those jokes to audiences in the form of stand-up comedy.
Mercenary Pen @mercenary_pen
185 Followers 338 Following "It's not secondhand smoke that kills, it's secondhand thoughts." -George Herms
ABUBAKAR MOHAMMED @AbubakarM59820
24 Followers 491 Following
Alyssa Finchum @amfinchum
5 Followers 2K Following
Scott Guild @_scottguild
2K Followers 2K Following Author of PLASTIC (@pantheonbooks '24) Words in @TIME, @NPR, @lithub Rep: @thecleggagency 🎵 Plastic: The Album out 5/31/24 https://t.co/ZYMXT0IRBU
thecurmudgeonly @thecurmudgeonly
1K Followers 314 Following A lighthearted critique of life, the universe, and everything else
Molly Wadzeck Kraus @MWadzeckKraus
2K Followers 2K Following writing: memoir, culture, repro rights, parenting, mental health. part-time poet. I do not have an inside voice. always running late bc I stopped to pet a dog.
Anthony DeVito 💰 @AnthonyDeVito
3K Followers 1K Following I called Jennifer Aniston a c*cktease on S3 of The Morning Show. #SagAftra Actor. Comedian. 4th gen. Brooklynite. he/him. Co-founder @TheArtOfBklyn. Dog = God
Angelo Rocca @ThatRocca
199 Followers 2K Following
Corbett @Corbett1380
22 Followers 965 Following
Mick Rogers @MickRogersEsq
158 Followers 820 Following I piggybacked here from a pizza dough freezer.
Chason Gordon @chasongordon
487 Followers 278 Following Writer / piteous wretch of a man. Words in Slate, Splice, McSweeney's, SlackJaw, Vice, Globe and Mail, other places words go. Find less on https://t.co/YAYeEFj0oj
Rob Shapiro @RobShapiro1991
425 Followers 705 Following Poems in @pshares, @AGNIMagazine, @NERweb, @southern_review | MFA from @UVACWP | Dog Enthusiast | NYC | he/him
Tattletale Times @TattletaleTimes
443 Followers 943 Following Your go-to source for hilarious satire news on the chaotic world of parenting. https://t.co/pFbpZ6Lfd1
Monica @monicagivati
895 Followers 2K Following writer, educator, creative, ❤️words #content language enthusiast #mom #writer liberal U.S. Israeli Brazilian, ally, #writingcommunity loving #vss365 #vsshorror
Rachel Lapides @rachellapides
3K Followers 3K Following comedienne & poetess @iowawriterswksp ’25 @swarthmore I am kinda interested in everything unknown to me
Chloe Yelena Miller @ChloeYMiller
3K Followers 4K Following Writer & Writing Coach #binders; she/her, Author of Viable @PoetryLily, @brownbaglit co-founder, DC, English/Italian, https://t.co/ZoYUY5HX95
Henry Block @hblock99
327 Followers 322 Following Lost at sea | Features @theonion, contributor @reductress
Gerry Flahive @gflahive
4K Followers 5K Following Writer & Producer at MODERN STORY; Author of I OWN THIS TOWN: THE MAYOR BERT XANADU XANTHOLOGY; Emmy & Peabody Award winner. @moviemayor [email protected]
Jeremy Spool @jeremyspool
795 Followers 1K Following NIH K99 postdoc fellow in the @HealeyLab. A mammal studying birds. Bluesky: @jeremyspool.bsky.social
Spyros Petrounakos @SPetrounakos
64 Followers 505 Following editor & translator, book reviewer, writer, returning philosopher
Tyler Riggers @RiggersOfLife
1K Followers 985 Following Writer @ComedyCentral, Animator @HBO, Formerly ranked 126th in the world in Air Hockey
RichieTureson @RichieTure90465
142 Followers 2K Following
Molly Burford @mburf92
1K Followers 5K Following Freelance writer covering mental health, lifestyle, and relationships. Reluctant Capricorn. Aggressively supportive. Get in touch: [email protected].
Madeline Hester @mad_hester
133 Followers 759 Following copywriter, cartoonist, crier of sappy commercials
Timothy McSweeney @mcsweeneys
261K Followers 1K Following The official twitter feed of McSweeney's Quarterly Concern, McSweeney's Internet Tendency, & McSweeney's Books. Publisher of @illustoria and @believermag.
Lucy Huber @clhubes
80K Followers 2K Following editor @mcsweeneys Mother of: 👦🏼👶🏼🐈⬛🐈🐠🐌 Writer? Hungry. Tired.
Kristen Mulrooney @missmulrooney
14K Followers 2K Following Editor @The_Belladonnas. Writing in The New Yorker, McSweeneys, Gilmore Girls: The Official Cookbook kristenmmm on Insta
Jennie Egerdie @hijennieblair
4K Followers 2K Following 🇨🇦 Author OH BOTHER + Frog and Toad Are Doing Their Best (@vulture Best of 2021) | Words @newyorkerhumor @mcsweeneys | Rep @LauraMazer | she/they
Audrey Burges @Audrey_Burges
8K Followers 5K Following Author, A HOUSE LIKE AN ACCORDION (2024) & THE MINUSCULE MANSION OF MYRA MALONE (2023); scribbler of humor, flash, & pretty flowers; thinks you're awesome
Miriam Jayaratna @Jayaratnahhh
1K Followers 457 Following clinical psychologist 👂🏻 and writer 😩 | words in @newyorker @mcsweeneys @Reductress @bostonglobe @the_rumpus @realpunknews @identitytheory et al.
sleepiest girl in the.. @v_dcknz
9K Followers 3K Following headlinezzzz @theonion @reductress • Hyperfocus: A Neurodivergent Comedy Show @caveatnyc next show May 12 😇
Kevin Burke @Ke7inBurke
5K Followers 1K Following hey! | headline contributor @theonion @reductress @bwaybeatnews | he/him
Gracie Beaver-Kairis @beaverkairis
2K Followers 2K Following Writer/Introvert/Oregonian. Haha's in: @realpunknews @mcsweeneys @WeeklyHumorist @PointsInCase @SlackjawHumor, etc. She/her. Insta: graciebk.writes
Christopher Monks @crmonks
6K Followers 793 Following Managing editor of the humor site @McSweeneys Internet Tendency. Author of The Ultimate Game Guide to Your Life. Fragile Sixers, Dolphins, & Red Sox fan.
meg✨✨ @mjhorgss
2K Followers 980 Following copywriter, humor writer, crier | words in @reductress @realpunknews @realoverheardla
Weekly Humorist @WeeklyHumorist
9K Followers 7K Following The Humor Magazine. The Standard In American Immaturity. Editor-in-Chief @MartyDundics @TheWebbyAwards Nominated 🏆Buy print or digital issues, subscribe today!
Reductress @Reductress
298K Followers 657 Following The one and only fake women's news magazine. Shop, learn and listen to everything Reductress: https://t.co/rZ2ivP7vKO
Carlos Greaves @shadesofgreaves
5K Followers 2K Following Engineer. Writer. Friend | Author of Spoilers: Essays That Might Ruin Your Favorite Hollywood Movies
Blayr 🌻 @BlayrAustin
9K Followers 6K Following ‘Writer’ | Teacher @TheSecondCity | Not a serious person 🥸 | Distinguished Tweeter 🐦 | My classes: Writing Sadness Through Humor, Funny Essay ✏️
K.E. Flann @kathyflann
4K Followers 3K Following Writer, 4 books, Words @washingtonpost @Slate @bostonglobe @mcsweeneys @WeeklyHumorist @The_Belladonnas @PointsinCase Rep'd by @millercallihan #binders HWA SFWA
Pastrami Mommy @Ewelannawhite
4K Followers 4K Following a half-sour pickle | *ctor, vo artist and comedy writer | contributor @realpunknews @harddrivemag @bwaybeatnews
Luke Burns @LukeVBurns
2K Followers 1K Following Gonna be posting way less on here! Check out my site for contact info, etc. Writing funny stuff/weird stuff. New Yorker, McSweeney's. https://t.co/yNKx4MWxzD // he/him
Lillian Stone @originalspinstr
8K Followers 4K Following culture writer // author: EVERYBODY’S FAVORITE, out now from @deystreet 💋 @wgaeast shrew 👊
Kate Herzlin @KateHerzlin
1K Followers 2K Following she/her/hers. writer, feminist killjoy, Bernadette Peters. words in @mcsweeneys @The_Belladonnas @PointsinCase @WeeklyHumorist lit rep’d by @agentsaba
Lillie E. Franks, on .. @onyxaminedlife
3K Followers 324 Following Real life Baphomet and dizzy gaming broad. Plural. She/her or they/them. A short story writer, I guess. Weird jokes, political rants, some positivity. Friendly!
T.K. Jürgens🖋️�.. @ToomasJurgens
5K Followers 5K Following An ordinary guy from somewhere in Northern #Europe, who likes to play with #words and writes mostly #scifi, but also a bit of #magical #realism and #fantasy.
Professor Driggs @ProfessorDriggs
470 Followers 351 Following Writer for God @ thegoodgodabove, freelance dentist
Jane Demarest @drawjanedraw
70 Followers 119 Following ( they/them) illustrator based in philly ig @ little.boy.bluee email: [email protected]
Gina Barreca @TheGinaBarreca
2K Followers 1K Following Bestselling author, Leading expert on gender and humor, Internationally celebrated speaker. Charming troublemaker.
Annmarie Kelly-Harbau.. @annmariek_h
2K Followers 4K Following Teacher. Mom. Friend to dogs. Host: WILD PRECIOUS LIFE. Author: HERE BE DRAGONS. I always talk to strangers.
Joe Tilleli @sorrywrongjoe
1K Followers 3K Following co-founder & editor at @PaletteSwapMag • gaming & tech editor at @ItsTheInventory | @KinjaDeals • formerly @HardDriveMag • (He/Him)
Bayou Wolf Press @BayouWolf3
7K Followers 7K Following Bayou Wolf Press - Bringing you books with freckles and glasses. Husband/wife team making indie books! #WritingCommunity #publishing #indiebooks #literature
Nate Armbruster @natecomedy
3K Followers 2K Following I like to write jokes. And tell those jokes to audiences in the form of stand-up comedy.
Mercenary Pen @mercenary_pen
185 Followers 338 Following "It's not secondhand smoke that kills, it's secondhand thoughts." -George Herms
Alicia Brooks @alireader
2K Followers 4K Following Alicia Brooks is a Literary Agent at The Jean Naggar Literary Agency. She was an editor at Penguin, Nan A. Talese/Doubleday, and Picador/St. Martin’s Press.
Scott Guild @_scottguild
2K Followers 2K Following Author of PLASTIC (@pantheonbooks '24) Words in @TIME, @NPR, @lithub Rep: @thecleggagency 🎵 Plastic: The Album out 5/31/24 https://t.co/ZYMXT0IRBU
thecurmudgeonly @thecurmudgeonly
1K Followers 314 Following A lighthearted critique of life, the universe, and everything else
Anthony DeVito 💰 @AnthonyDeVito
3K Followers 1K Following I called Jennifer Aniston a c*cktease on S3 of The Morning Show. #SagAftra Actor. Comedian. 4th gen. Brooklynite. he/him. Co-founder @TheArtOfBklyn. Dog = God
Molly Wadzeck Kraus @MWadzeckKraus
2K Followers 2K Following writing: memoir, culture, repro rights, parenting, mental health. part-time poet. I do not have an inside voice. always running late bc I stopped to pet a dog.
Chason Gordon @chasongordon
487 Followers 278 Following Writer / piteous wretch of a man. Words in Slate, Splice, McSweeney's, SlackJaw, Vice, Globe and Mail, other places words go. Find less on https://t.co/YAYeEFj0oj
Rob Shapiro @RobShapiro1991
425 Followers 705 Following Poems in @pshares, @AGNIMagazine, @NERweb, @southern_review | MFA from @UVACWP | Dog Enthusiast | NYC | he/him
Rachel Lapides @rachellapides
3K Followers 3K Following comedienne & poetess @iowawriterswksp ’25 @swarthmore I am kinda interested in everything unknown to me
Chloe Yelena Miller @ChloeYMiller
3K Followers 4K Following Writer & Writing Coach #binders; she/her, Author of Viable @PoetryLily, @brownbaglit co-founder, DC, English/Italian, https://t.co/ZoYUY5HX95
Henry Block @hblock99
327 Followers 322 Following Lost at sea | Features @theonion, contributor @reductress
Tyler Riggers @RiggersOfLife
1K Followers 985 Following Writer @ComedyCentral, Animator @HBO, Formerly ranked 126th in the world in Air Hockey
carly @carlygibson3
200 Followers 238 Following
Sheryl Stillman @SherylStillman
299 Followers 921 Following Mom | Freelance Writer | Change Management | Executive Coach | GCWA Communications Officer |Bylines: NextAvenue, Insider, WIRED. https://t.co/6uU17f7bCZ
Leila Sales @LeilaSalesBooks
7K Followers 3K Following Leila Sales suffers for her art. Well, it's not really art. But it's something. And she suffers. My newest book, THE MUSEUM OF LOST AND FOUND, is out now!
Mina Manchester @minalmanchester
1K Followers 3K Following MFA @sewaneeletters. Work in @electriclit @evergreenreview @huffpost @columbiajournal @thenormalschool She/her Feminist LA Scandinavian
Nathan Cowley @NathanJayCowley
95 Followers 374 Following
Dustin M. Hoffman @dustinmhoffman
3K Followers 4K Following Author of One-Hundred-Knuckled Fist @UnivNebPress, No Good for Digging @wordwestpress. Writer of work and teacher of verbs.
Tori Fletcher @hellotorifletch
10K Followers 11K Following Honestly, if it were “raining men” Hallelujah wouldn’t be the word that came to mind | Part Antagonist, Part Protagonist | Usually Making Fun of my Husband
Philip Kean @The_Philip_Kean
118 Followers 385 Following Hot Werds (wjords?) in @McSweeneys, @SlackjawHumor and @PointsinCase
Carolyn Bridget Kenne.. @CarolynBKennedy
108K Followers 106K Following 🇨🇦 Actor/Filmmaker in LA @sagaftra @ACTRAnational @groundlings @ucbtla @SecondCityLA #StandUp Agents: @90210Talent @HeroArtists Publicist @WendyShepherd
Amy Greenlee @greenleeish
49 Followers 100 Following Editor @ThatPauseButton @GospelofJest | Words in @mcsweeneys @The_Belladonnas @SlackjawHumor @JaneWastebasket @FrazzledHumor @WeeklyHumorist
Diabetic of Enlighten.. @dee_of_e
5K Followers 934 Following fuck you at $12.50 an hour I should have started a chemical fire
GMA @GMA88
786 Followers 2K Following Author, Orioles fan, father of 3, attorney, husband. Writer for @McSweeneys, @PointsInCase, @SplitSider, @1966Journal, @WritersBone, @WeeklyHumorist
Sianna Lani @SiannaLani
287 Followers 808 Following Hawaii-based humor writer | @SlackjawHumor @PointsInCase @littleoldlady__ @UmMuddy
Samson Madella @SamsonMadella
548 Followers 3K Following your mom's favorite copywriter. erstwhile rockstar. contributor @pointsincase. alum @vcubrandcenter. street photographer. dad.
Sauleha Kamal, PhD @Sauliloquy1
4K Followers 2K Following Researcher, Writer• Commission at sauleha.kamal@gmail• Words @NewYorkerhumor @theAtlantic @the_belladonnas• alumna @cambridge_uni @barnardcollege @columbia
Greg Marshall @gregrmarshall
3K Followers 5K Following LEG: THE STORY OF A LIMB AND THE BOY WHO GREW FROM IT (Abrams, June 13) https://t.co/KORkhpdksj NEA/Yaddo/MacDowell, agent: @hbrattesani
Allison K Williams @GuerillaMemoir
18K Followers 4K Following Writer | editor | speaker | coach Rebirth Your Book retreats Social Media Editor @Brevitymag | Rep @Janet_Reid work @TheMoth @cbcradio @NPR @NYTimes #binders
David Stone (Just loo.. @AuthorDavidSto1
5K Followers 5K Following Author Of "The Vacation Wife" & Other Satirical Novels Currently Overlooked By The New York Times Bestseller Lists. Available in Kindle Unlimited (link below):
Jenny Hatchadorian @jhatchadorian
123 Followers 759 Following Mutha // Vol. 1 BK // weekly humorist // full grown people // little old lady // St. Nell’s // everything good podcast // I’m better at insta @hatchadorianhere
Hadas Weiss @weiss_hadas
6K Followers 5K Following "I used to be just like you before I started going to therapy"
James Tate Hill @JamesTateHill
10K Followers 3K Following Memoir: Blind Man's Bluff @WWNorton, NYT Editors' Choice, novel: Academy Gothic, Editor: @Monkeybicycle, WV native, agent: @ericsmithrocks
Gastor Almonte @GastorAlmonte
2K Followers 637 Following Debut Special ‘Immigrant Made’ out now. https://t.co/MlWN1gCuIk
Phil @Phil_Burton1
93 Followers 267 Following Seattle Stand-up @pointsincase, @theneedling, @flexxmag
Bongani @bonganimadethis
240 Followers 331 Following Comedian | words @slackjawhumor, @pointsincase, @flexxmag & more | Dropping vids every Saturday with So Close Comedy | Disappointing 7 days a week 🇿🇼🇿🇦
Luke Strathmann @LukeStrathmann
227 Followers 521 Following Writer, editor, comedian, economist, & poet.
@TaliaArgondezzi A nightmare of mine for years. Relieved to know there's a name for them.
*The purge alarm sounds* *Starts ripping off mattress tags*
"This brief email, which I hemmed and hawed over for seven weeks before finally dashing it off and sending it in a thoroughly uncharacteristic burst of un-self-conscious productivity, could not have happened without the support of countless others." mcsweeneys.net/articles/ackno…
5yo to me & her twin: i’m the mommy and you’re my twins me: ok what should i do? 5yo: try to kill her
If I say “you too” to the McDonalds chick when she tells me “enjoy your meal” I always shove a few fries in her mouth so it’s not that awkward
How can Star Wars have three desert planets but not a single planet that looks like this?
MLB has now begun a new service in which you can order ballpark favorites to be delivered to your home. I can’t even
@Phillips_AM @TaliaArgondezzi She got out of bed at 10pm because she was too scared of the bubble to sleep, so I pulled up some videos of people rolling down hills in human hamster balls, which she loved. Then she made me give her an oral history of Jake Gyllenhaal's filmography until 10:30.
@TaliaArgondezzi This is a good point, only time will tell
Parenting fail: my 6-year-old overreacts every time she gets hurt so I told her if she can’t get it together she’ll have to be a Bubble Girl, and I showed her the trailer for Bubble Boy starring Jake Gyllenhaal and she cried.
I quit my last job because it’s hard to making a living solely from tips. I’ll never try to be a detective again!
Who has two thumbs and finished her book proposal draft today?? It’s me!
the first person to deploy the phrase "there's more than one way to skin a cat" in casual conversation was taking a big swing
"Expecting your partner to support you doesn’t make you uptight, and I hope we can universally stop villainizing women who refuse to put up with a lazy manchild who loves his bongs too much, no matter how fun and lovable that manchild may be." mcsweeneys.net/articles/a-let…
Make sure to review Kant’s rules for dinner parties so that you’re ready to celebrate his 300th birthday on Monday
Moms with daughters, you guys have the thing where you see yourself in a mirror and suddenly realize after years of hating the way you look you’re actually really pretty because you can see your daughters face in your own?? 😭🫠
If you live in Richmond, near RVA, or ever thought “hey, I should visit Richmond sometime,” then May 21 at 6 would be a really good day to pick so you can go to the launch party for my second book, A HOUSE LIKE AN ACCORDION, hosted by @FountainBkstore! eventbrite.com/e/a-house-like…
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