Sinistral Sasquatch @_sinistroll
Those darned kids with spray paint tagged me in deface. twitr.buzz/_sinistroll/fa… Joined November 2016-
Tweets155
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Followers484
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Following536
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Likes565
Didn't Steven Spielbird write the screenplay for Poultrygeist?
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[customer service] REP: Laclede Gaslighting ME: My gas is disconnected REP: Hmm, looks fine to me ME: But it doesn't work REP: You're crazy
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
Got a great picture of the eclipse.
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
FRIEND: hey while I'm on vacation can you come over and feed the cat? ME: FRIEND: ME: to what?
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
[smallpox] Only 1890's kids will get this
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
[Starbucks] Customer: I'll have a venti dark roast, please. Me: Sure. Your hair's as flat as your heart monitor line will be one day. Ciao!
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
When you're a whale ghost and you haunt your ex's wedding
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
Hello, 911, me again. I know you told me the spider is harmless, but now it's saying climate change isn't real
Practical joke: start a rumor online that your friend's house is an exclusive speakeasy.
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
Him: *Head in hands* Her: What's happened? Him: Well- I...I... I found this head
Why is it called flooding instead of bursting at the streams?
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
20 mins is not a nap. It's a very long blink.
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
*picking up all the dropped mics I could sell these on Craigslist.
Thanks (for) giving me a trophy, @thisgirlstacr!!
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
Needless to say I was not woke all night
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
i got a white noise machine to help me sleep but it just says things like "i have many Latino friends" & "you should check out this podcast"
Sinistral Sasquatch retweeted
I am definitely too firmly grounded in the space-time continuum to park here
This fellow 'squatch is amazing. Thank you so much, @KoKeniSasquatch!
[WEDDING] DJ: It's time to do the electric slide!! DATE: Let's dance! ME (terrified of when everyone turns and I'm in front): I'm Amish.
Adrenalin @adrenalindenver
23K Followers 756 Following Denver pop punk. DM for booking info! Guitar/vocals: Woody B Bass: Dave Cactus Drums: Ripcord Lead Guitar: Duncan
NotSoSuperHero-Jessic... @NJessicajones
9 Followers 205 Following I overanalyze my overanalysis. Looking for this guy I used to know. He just fell off. Hoping to find where and fall off too.
тнe ѕaтυrday con... @saturdaycontest
3K Followers 2K Following Want to trophy in our weekly tweet game? Pick your winning tweet from our contest feed, notify us & your winner at or by 6p ET to make our lists.
fightgeek @fightgeek
10K Followers 8K Following i wander around outside and hangout with dogs mostly 🇺🇸
Funny Tweeter @thefunnytweeter
12K Followers 4K Following If we retweet you, that means your tweet was published in https://t.co/Sjvvd3oshD. To submit a tweet, mention @thefunnytweeter
Seamus Campbell @conform
205 Followers 285 Following he/they. Thorns/Timbers/various nerdy nonsense. also: https://t.co/0zUYYiwjur
DJ Kam Bennett @KameronBennett
1.9M Followers 1.5M Following I play music. for booking events & business only email [email protected] | DM for promo
Nikita's Arby's hate ... @nikitaaakuma
67 Followers 1K Following I/O Psychology Master's Student. Soldier. Happily taken. Husky and tortie cat momther.
toaster queen @toasterqueen1
17 Followers 157 Following impeccable accuracy in identifying vacuums based off of sound
Clover @woodlandwaves
166 Followers 1K Following this is the twitter that my family is blocked on. she/her. BLM
Destinations Paranorm... @Dest_Paranormal
1K Followers 3K Following Join us as we explore all aspects of the paranormal world. Destinations Paranormal travels and investigates paranormal locations. See us on Youtube.
Sunday Funday Contest @SundayContest
861 Followers 1K Following Show me the funny. Hosted by @kryzazy
Avalon fest🦄fairy ... @shroomtester
495 Followers 4K Following Activist weed shroom queer musician. toking tattoo vegan painter. anti-trump liberal yoga belly dancer.🌈Surviver anarchist artist piano jazz bhangra thc
Bigfoot Chasers @BigfootChasers
451 Followers 1K Following We are Joe and Craig, and we look for Bigfoot. (spoiler alert, we’ll find him)
bradley anderson @BellPupper
551 Followers 999 Following IG: @bradleykyleanderson | @negative25music
RMSO Bigfoot @RMSOBigfoot
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Virginia Hudgins @Vhudg
683 Followers 3K Following naps & dog videos are the solution to all of life's problems...post-apocalypse, call me Curly Squirrelly. Check out (@Vhudg): https://t.co/JH3qhmXNWE
TrapKrayonz @KrayonBitch
119 Followers 116 Following How much dip would a dipshit shit if a dipshit could shit dip? skwibble skwibble 🖍️🖍️
Phil @philthy0phil
707 Followers 2K Following
THE Burger King @ABurgerADay
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Patches @mostly_cheese
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Mild Wes Anderson @MildWes
24 Followers 496 Following
Maria @frk_maria
2K Followers 3K Following Just here for the laughs&free ice cream. If I don't answer right away,I probably have stuff to do.Like drinking whisky&dancing in my PJs http://t.co/3tQmlTTg1e
🌎 back on my bulls... @sufferingzen
797 Followers 5K Following “That’s the problem with millennials, they think they’re too good for the Rust Belt”
RØB€RT @rubbertoe1988
805 Followers 3K Following Amateur Chef, Hotelier, Gym Junkie, Inappropriate and Occasionally Funny. https://t.co/vtQeMzRu1q
K-dog 🔥🔥🔥 @Kdog_2001
2K Followers 2K Following Quite possibly the greatest human being who ever lived. Like. Ever. 🧐 https://t.co/w4nk2rN1jl
DoPoMoFo @DoPoMoFo
87 Followers 439 Following Skills include matrixing, rythme, and spot on sense of direction.
Katzz @kathleeno001
248 Followers 1K Following Striving to be the person my dog thinks I am, and not the crazy loser my cat thinks I am. Ok maybe a little crazy is fine..
Camada @youdonotexist
318 Followers 480 Following Tech Director at @Globant. Writer of code, whisper of people. Casual maker of games. All views expressed are probably mine.
no great matter @BringDaNoyz
7K Followers 2K Following likes strawberry rhubarb pie and the New York Mets, dislikes pretty much everything else || screen printing IG: sympathetic.inker || she/her
Walt M 🦬 @everydoghisday
175 Followers 5K Following
Ji jjang @Jijjang972
30 Followers 426 Following There shall be eternal summer in the grateful heart.
Avery Burns @avery_burns99
5 Followers 86 Following
predator taco @_godgodgodgod
8K Followers 3K Following there is only we. no filter. art for all. alpha and omega. your master.
Neil Tyson Karaoke @NdGTkaraoke
37 Followers 240 Following Correcting scientific errors in popular music for the good of humanity
Hyde @frogshack
771 Followers 468 Following I write very stupid things and put them online (my tweets👇)
Mysterious @MysticGalzz
12K Followers 13K Following Mystery creates wonder and wonder is the basis of man's desire to understand.
schmox @IvoryGazelle
12K Followers 480 Following Two lib arts degrees and a diabetic cat https://t.co/LLhnBtQDij…
♥mark magark♥ @markedly
23K Followers 327 Following See the world through the eyes of an idiot. | he/him
Todd 'Papi' Carlos @TheToddWilliams
24K Followers 693 Following Engineer I'm also on BlueSky. Same name.
Adrenalin @adrenalindenver
23K Followers 756 Following Denver pop punk. DM for booking info! Guitar/vocals: Woody B Bass: Dave Cactus Drums: Ripcord Lead Guitar: Duncan
predator taco @_godgodgodgod
8K Followers 3K Following there is only we. no filter. art for all. alpha and omega. your master.
Wedyan @HadToChangeIt_
2K Followers 1K Following ✨Manifesting sunflower fields and kitten paws ✨ #ItsDee
Mysterious @MysticGalzz
12K Followers 13K Following Mystery creates wonder and wonder is the basis of man's desire to understand.
Kantye West @Kantye_West
28K Followers 303 Following The natural fusion of 18th Century Enlightenment Philosopher Immanuel Kant with tweets from Kanye West #parody
Nihilist Arby's @nihilist_arbys
327K Followers 0 Following Officially, I have nothing to do with arby's. Unofficially, everything is nothing. Eat Arby's
J🍩ey Bag 🍩f D�... @joeybagovdonuts
45K Followers 31K Following 3x Best #Pittsburgh Twitter Account |Host of @TheDonutBag Podcast| #Steelers #HereWeGo #LetsGoPens #IFB after vetting
dick snickers @smithsara79
37K Followers 727 Following My name isn’t really sara; I just don't want my students googling me & finding out I say fuck. (any pronouns, just don’t be an asshole)
no great matter @BringDaNoyz
7K Followers 2K Following likes strawberry rhubarb pie and the New York Mets, dislikes pretty much everything else || screen printing IG: sympathetic.inker || she/her
schmox @IvoryGazelle
12K Followers 480 Following Two lib arts degrees and a diabetic cat https://t.co/LLhnBtQDij…
Caitlin @caithuls
15K Followers 2K Following Art, code, comedy. I live in South Carolina and in my head
Sean_ 🌎✌🏻 @spn814
2K Followers 2K Following I'm on a Bus on a Psychedelic Trip readin' Murder Books, tryin' to stay Hip.
Dee doubledeamber @deamberdona2t
5K Followers 2K Following some people's profiles are so interesting or funny that they lure you in. Mine isn't one those. https://t.co/iBXkqdjkef
Campbell D. Tre 🎙 @TheSarcasmPod
3K Followers 579 Following How many times a day are you misunderstood? let’s talk about it.
₥Ɏ ₮ⱤɄ₮Ⱨ ... @My_Truth_Today
7K Followers 8K Following Nova Scotia, Canada | #FreeSpeech #Memes #Drugs #Lulz #Linux #Privacy #Podcasts #Torrent | Remember #RehtaehParsons | Header @unFukyourself
Sock Hollidre @sock_holliday
5K Followers 1K Following Still seeking the perfect banana bread recipe online RECENT: https://t.co/JSJHjRFpqP
Better Movies @BetterMoviesPod
45 Followers 75 Following A movie podcast starring @AdamBroud, @ABurgerADay, @Panmidwest and @MattMcC1
EricaTriesToTweet @EricaWhoToYou
4K Followers 2K Following attempting but often failing at most things
Toby Herman @tobyherman27
5K Followers 2K Following someone is staring at you in personal growth. tobyherman27 at the gmail // @tobyherman27 on the insta and everywhere else
The Ramen Shaman @ghostofphantom
1K Followers 4K Following I am the ghost of a cat with a moustache and a tuxedo, and I am singlehandedly propping up the global instant ramen noodle industry.
TheOfficePhilosopher @TheOPhilosopher
5K Followers 5K Following Give me a minute to get into character...
✌︎ ×͜× @lrs91x
3K Followers 124 Following
blank plank @tiring_tho23
13K Followers 11K Following hopeless nerd, neurodivergent, expect random unfiltered emotions. logic matters, not your bias.
🇨🇦 Garth Collin... @Voiceofgarth
9K Followers 779 Following https://t.co/Pyz91JQojQ The voice heard around the world and down the street from the wintry woods of Western Canada.
Basic White Mom @basicwhiteM0m
11K Followers 7K Following If you like people who do stupid shit become a Mom!
King Con 👑 🎸�... @KingConsLair
3K Followers 2K Following Singer/Songwriter, Guitar & Harmonica. Educated Derelict. 20+ year SAG/AFTRA Alumnus. 🎓
Carbosly @Carbosly
25K Followers 5K Following Mother. Lover. Wondering what happened to the cow in Twister.
sam.i.am @samiam604
17K Followers 8K Following If it's important enough, you find a fucking way. I would be your hero, but I already am to my kids. Kindness always matters ❤
brammercat @brammercat
3K Followers 6K Following REALTOR® with Royal LePage Riverbend Realty. Buying or selling? Let me make your Real Estate experience a great one!
Clark Springheel @ClarkSpringheel
3K Followers 50 Following 🎵Singing songs and drinking wine while your eyes play games with mine🎵
andrew @AndrewsNotFunny
7K Followers 760 Following idk either dude. avi by @andrewsnotfunny https://t.co/7Bj68wCeCN
ms melece ms @melecevida
380 Followers 1K Following Couples and sex therapist in training just trying to displease her Mormon ancestors as much as possible · 🏳️🌈· she/her
lindsay! @earthhorse78
6K Followers 6K Following you can either handle my opinions or you can’t. pronouns: up/yours. hi stalkers 👀
Neodimes 🦕 @neodymium03
5K Followers 5K Following What I lack in good looks I more than make up for in smarts, inappropriate humor, and paucity of dick pics.
Coal Slag @coalslag
5K Followers 4K Following ...what part of “Flyin’ Monkey,” you no understand...?
Joey Huspek @joeyhuspek
22K Followers 1K Following Musician that sucks at marketing. Follow me on Bluesky: https://t.co/XaH284am0X
Lovable Misanthrope @LaurelleMartin
20K Followers 19K Following likes: Netflix, naps, tarot cards and talking to the dead.
水果机 双赢棋�... @DonMcCoy23
4K Followers 4K Following #StrawberryFundsForever #GoHalos #FinsUp #TarHeels #RollTide
Suds @stacywawa1
18K Followers 6K Following I work, play, mom. In it for the (in)sanity and laughs. https://t.co/lInVHpd2niTrends for United States
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