Super Smart Cloud @decoycloud
Look how happy my dog looks favstar.fm/users/decoyclo… Fort Collins Joined July 2013-
Tweets4K
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Followers494
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Following294
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Likes4K
I create cover letters and/or resumes for dogs.
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My girlfriend has been getting high recently and having threesomes with dudes she meets at the gas station. Think their names were Ben&Jerry
I want to date a gastroenterologist and introduce them to people as the poop doctor
Pet sitting is like getting paid to rent an animal. need more opportunities to rent animals. I want a penguin to hang out for the holidays
Why do white people think it's cute to sit on the ground and eat food?
I'm so broke that I had to have packing peanuts for a snack.
My friends and I started a fantasy football criminal league. We pretended it didn't exist for 4 months though.
If her last name was Hegel, Katherine could have used the diabetic dialectic on Greys Anatomy
Super Smart Cloud retweeted
Twenty years ago if you sent someone a picture of your face & an omelette you went to an insane asylum
Just because I asked what game you were playing doesn't mean turn up your Game Boy you nerd
Until someone convinces me otherwise, congress is just old man babies stacked on each other's shoulders in ill fitting suits.
What idiot called it a small amount of cocaine and not a baby bump
One time a redneck at the gas station told me "you study long, you study wrong" and that's how I ended up with a sixer of Miller Lite.
Sriracha's (loose) English translation is:fire cock of the dragon
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