🏃♀️⚖️ @CanPanicNow
Joined August 2017-
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When you live in that little black spot area and they didn't give a percentage range for
When you live in that little black spot area and they didn't give a percentage range for https://t.co/zYtT29qLJz
Ya know. I think I'll just hang out at home today.
Ya know. I think I'll just hang out at home today.
Not all runners have time goals. Like I run so my resting heart rate scares doctors.
Lawyer networking event Icebreakers should get spicier. Instead "what are of law do you practice," tell me "who in this room would you trust the least to be your co-counsel"
What’s going to be an unintended result of Columbia having their students arrested is they’re about to expose a bunch of middle and upper middle class families to how NYPD, cash bail, and Rikers are weaponized against people in this city everyday.
In law school, I imagined I'd want to do trial stuff. Be in court. Now, nope. Someone just pay me to research and write. You don't even have to talk to me. Just lemme writ my little law stories and drink my little coffees. TYIA
Look. Normal people don't go to law school. That wasn't a profession. That's a psychological screening test. And we all failed.
What if, your Honor, before oral arguments, we all had some little snacks?
Forget the character and fitness application or the bar exam. Lawyers should be tested on how kindly they treat animals. Dogs, cats, caterpillars, and squirrels. If they're cruel, immediately prison.
For sale: Law Degree. Works fine. Just a little cursed.
There are two kinds of lawyers. Ones that obsess over grammar and the ones that just doesnt
New Lawyer: "These older attorneys trust me so much. I'm doing the whole brief. All by myself!" Me, also a lawyer: ". . . So you're doing all the work, not getting full credit or pay?" New lawyer: "It's such a great opportunity to learn, he said!" Me: "Painting fences is fun."
Lawyers: "don't worry. This is a carefully calculated risk." Also lawyers: "I hate math."
When SCOTUS publishes anything during an eclipse, it's technically all the shadow docket
No longer saying hello to opposing counsels. Just "May thy knife chip and shatter"
The nicest, most pleasant, accommodating lawyers are actually the most intimidating humans alive.
"Hi, mom, can you pick me up? I'm at the court house. I don't like it here." Mom, long pause: "No. You're a lawyer. That's literally your job."
Case law: *overruled 20 years ago* Client: "I found something of relevance I'd like you to use."
Liz Gil @LizCGil
24K Followers 6K Following founding atty @ optimal counsel. startup lawyer. dog momager. alum @fenwickwest. @lizcgil.bsky.social. she/her. opinions my own. 🇨🇺🗽🦎Alyssa Leader @alittleleader
35K Followers 3K Following public defender for kids and grown-ups | Cajun far from home | can guess your taylor swift era | she/herAlex Su @heyitsalexsu
32K Followers 655 Following chief revenue officer @latitude_legal // left the law to sell stuff to lawyersBarred and Bearded @RileeDHarrison
19K Followers 4K Following Husband. Dad. Oklahoman. Foodie. Amateur Golfer. Personal Injury Attorney.Andrew Kinsey @KinseyAndrew
11K Followers 1K Following Nobody special. Just a lawyer with a family. Oxford comma advocate. SFF fan. Hobby woodworker, baker, and gardener. He/Him.Melissa Stewart @LissaJoStewart
14K Followers 1K Following Civil Rights Lawyer | Drag is not a crime | 🏳🌈 | [email protected] | she/theySean Silverman: Silve.. @BarExamTutor
10K Followers 4K Following Areas of Interest: Law, Logic, Mathematics || For Bar Exam Tutoring Info: [email protected] || For LSAT Tutoring Info: [email protected]Hannah @hannnahmmarie
21K Followers 1K Following civil rights lawyer | no rights without remedies | words mostly on PACERBigLawGothGF @biglawgothgf
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385 Followers 2K Following I'm a cultural connoisseur that is trying to educate and inform the general public about the history of the fantastic American Holidays that we celebrate!Sajjad Ali 🇮🇳 @AariyanDz
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479 Followers 828 Following Solo practitioner in Cambridge MA. Criminal defense and #TitleIX law. Mother of three. Very enthusiastic, very amateur runner and baker.Liz Gil @LizCGil
24K Followers 6K Following founding atty @ optimal counsel. startup lawyer. dog momager. alum @fenwickwest. @lizcgil.bsky.social. she/her. opinions my own. 🇨🇺🗽🦎Alyssa Leader @alittleleader
35K Followers 3K Following public defender for kids and grown-ups | Cajun far from home | can guess your taylor swift era | she/herAlex Su @heyitsalexsu
32K Followers 655 Following chief revenue officer @latitude_legal // left the law to sell stuff to lawyersBarred and Bearded @RileeDHarrison
19K Followers 4K Following Husband. Dad. Oklahoman. Foodie. Amateur Golfer. Personal Injury Attorney.Andrew Kinsey @KinseyAndrew
11K Followers 1K Following Nobody special. Just a lawyer with a family. Oxford comma advocate. SFF fan. Hobby woodworker, baker, and gardener. He/Him.Melissa Stewart @LissaJoStewart
14K Followers 1K Following Civil Rights Lawyer | Drag is not a crime | 🏳🌈 | [email protected] | she/theySean Silverman: Silve.. @BarExamTutor
10K Followers 4K Following Areas of Interest: Law, Logic, Mathematics || For Bar Exam Tutoring Info: [email protected] || For LSAT Tutoring Info: [email protected]Hannah @hannnahmmarie
21K Followers 1K Following civil rights lawyer | no rights without remedies | words mostly on PACERBigLawGothGF @biglawgothgf
9K Followers 2K Following IP litigator and copyright nerd. Providing snarky comments about copyright law and d&d. Certified cute by Reuters | she/her | 🏳️🌈|Michelle Strowhiro @strowhiro
11K Followers 1K Following Partner @McDermottLaw | Employment law + M&A | Mom of 2 | #penfluencer | #lawtwitter crochet club | Views, pens, pans, & puns are my ownTaylor Soule @TaylorOSoule
8K Followers 3K Following New mom. Public Defender @WisconsinSPD. She/her. @IowaLawSchool and @DrakeUniversity alumna. Minnesota-born/Iowa-grown.QENNY DOT @AKBrews
30K Followers 19K Following Attorney. #LawTwitter. Iconoclast. Spooky Lawyer. White Sox. Bears. Bulls. Chicago. Costco stan. Curator of spooky and weird things. #LiminalHoursSara Warf @SaraBWarf
11K Followers 1K Following Law Prof @unc_law (research & writing + clerkship writing). Former appellate clerk & atty. she/her. Likes: pockets on dresses. Dislikes: surprise driveway tubs.Zach Wolfe @zachwolfelaw
10K Followers 3K Following Texas non-compete & trade secret law. Also likes jazz, handstand pushups, Dallas Cowboys. Blog https://t.co/CLP7D26jT8 rated “unspeakably bad” by Twitter.Lawprofblawg @lawprofblawg
39K Followers 18K Following WARNING: May cause cognitive dissonance. If this occurs, unfollow or block me. Don't yell or spin what I said. Bluesky: https://t.co/eUcjpl8esrMallory Eeeeeeee @primnimproper_
7K Followers 4K Following Sorta-sabbitical-ing lawyer mom, indigent parent counsel, plush robe and blanket enthusiast, Roger the alien fangirl, casually profane, bakes and builds shit.Judge Stephen Dillard @JudgeDillard
33K Followers 8K Following Presiding Judge & 30th Chief Judge @AppealsCourtGA | @SamfordU 1992 - Pres. Emeritus @SamfordAlumni | @MC_Law 1996 | @DukeLaw (LLM 2025) | All views are my own.Rick Smith @ounwcm
26K Followers 3K Following Warning Coordination Meteorologist at NWS Norman. Follow @NWSNorman for official info. Opinions are mine and not my employer's.Meghan Mosley @KOCOMeghan
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87K Followers 3K Following Emmy Award-Winning Storm Chaser over 40 years.4K Extreme Weather Stock. Tesla-Cybertruck, Sales-Radar & Weather Displays & TEDx SpeakerOklahoma Mesonet @okmesonet
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17K Followers 996 Following Prison Fellowship seeks to restore those affected by crime and incarceration to make communities safer and healthier. Seek justice. Love mercy. Restore hope.Post a picture with your dog that doesn’t involve shooting them and throwing them in a gravel pit. I’ll start.
South Dakota Gov. Kristi Noem appears to have confirmed that she killed a family puppy that infuriated her by being “untrainable,” and she claims it only proves how “politically incorrect” she is. trib.al/wOcWZBs
Back when Teddy was a puppy ❤️🐶
Post a picture with your dog that doesn’t involve shooting them and throwing them in a gravel pit. I’ll start.
@KristiNoem You and Trump are meant for each other. Both vile.
@KristiNoem Grew up rural / farm. We never killed any of our dogs.
@KristiNoem You are so full of 💩it’s not even funny. You just couldn’t be bothered to train that puppy . And if he truly couldn’t be a bird dog, I am quite sure he would have been a great pet for a family that didn’t need to shoot birds to give him something to do. #psychopath
Kristi Noem is trash. Decades with hunting- and bird-dogs, and the number I've killed because they were chicken-sharp or had too much prey drive is ZERO. Puppies need slow exposure to birds, and bird-scent. She killed a puppy because she was lazy at training bird dogs, not…
‼️EVENTS CANCELLED DUE TO WX‼️ -Arts festival -Norman music fest -Edmond, Yukon, OKCPS (NW Classen / Emerson North) prom @koconews
Omg - now my blood is boiling. Remember, I’m a country boy who lives on a ranch . There’s a huge difference between putting an old horse down who is suffering, than shooting a 18 month dog for being untrainable. But then to plug your book at the end. Seriously, is it just me?…
We love animals, but tough decisions like this happen all the time on a farm. Sadly, we just had to put down 3 horses a few weeks ago that had been in our family for 25 years. If you want more real, honest, and politically INcorrect stories that’ll have the media gasping,…
There’s nothing you can say to justify shooting an 18-month-old puppy in the face and killing it. NOTHING! I don’t give AF what it did.
Just so you know … If you find a dog “untrainable” and you feel like the only answer is to shoot it in cold blood - I’ll gladly take the dog to live on the Catturd ranch until I can find - a loving home. All my abused rescues are so hard to take care of at first but if you…
I do have a ranch, you POS Karen and I’ve been a country boy my entire life, unlike you. The truth is, you’re the one with the “the soft ass life” Please explain how shooting an 18 month puppy in the face is being a real man - I’ll wait.
Here’s the thing, ALL Kristi Noem had to do was write ONE post for help rehoming Cricket for not having the temperament for a hunting /working ranch dog and countless rescue groups would’ve offered to train and place her in a home as solely a family pet. #KristiNoemIsAMonster
Might need to load up ole Dorothy today Be safe and weather aware, Oklahoma! #OKWX
@BDAhrensWX Holy fucking nightmare scenario there. You handled that as perfect as you could be expected to, given the 3 seconds you had to process things, and turned it into a best case scenario given the circumstances. Glad you're alright!
A semi ended my chase early today. I'm okay. What really matters is the devastating damage these storms have done and are continuing to do. #newx #wxtwitter