Lauren Hope Krass @laurenkrass
She/Her I tell jokes for a living & my twitter feed reflects poorly of this. TV Pilot "Fat With Standards" [email protected] https://t.co/CXESv1V7OS laurenhopekrass.com NYC Joined April 2009-
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Me in the 6th grade in my lil biz suit from lane Bryant bc that was all we had back then
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Jeans have come a long way. They were invented so railway workers could wash their clothes less often thus leading us into the Industrial Revolution even faster and now they are used to torment women.
Love it when my therapist is a no show to our appointment to talk about my abandonment issues.
Sometimes you just want all caps cake
Invite me to a place with chairs like this and I’m calling the police
I can’t think of a scenario in which I would want to smell men’s cologne.
Me when a really famous comic is running the light but I still got a show to run.
When you see diet culture creeping back into the zeitgeist
If it’s the thought that counts.. can we please just do a holiday thought exchange this year?
Come hear some new bits from pro comics tonight at @QEDAstoria 9pm tinyurl.com/52fyta59
A haunted house but each room is someone saying you should write a joke about their life
A haunted house but each room is a family member asking if you’ve tried to do SNL
A haunted house but each room is a host doing too much time in between acts
A haunted house but each room is a comedy festival application fee
A haunted house except each room is a crowdwork clip
A haunted house except each room is a booker being like it’s not required to bring anyone but please bring at least 5 people
gianmarco @GianmarcoSoresi
64K Followers 7K Following “you miss 100% of the shots you take” -my high school basketball coach
Gastor Almonte @GastorAlmonte
2K Followers 636 Following Debut Special ‘Immigrant Made’ out now. https://t.co/MlWN1gCuIk
Christian Finnegan @ChristFinnegan
56K Followers 3K Following Comedian? Listen to my albums/Watch my specials: https://t.co/GSgvaziyUz Read my newsletter, NEW MUSIC FOR OLDS: https://t.co/h2bUkVgf9k
Chris Gersbeck @CSGersbeck
4K Followers 3K Following I’m Chris Gersbeck. | @DumbIndustries | Producer @TheMadsAreBack @GoodtimeHour @MaryJoPehl @JackeyNeyman | email: [email protected]
amber rollo @ambercrollo
31K Followers 3K Following
Solidarity with Colum.. @OrangeFreddyG
9K Followers 4K Following Never gonna have a blue check, always gonna be real. Standup Comic and Leftist. 45 million views on Social Media. History Pod⬇️
luisa 🇵🇸 @luisadieznuts
7K Followers 2K Following anthropologist | arts & media worker | @whyyoumadpod | representing no person or institution but myself 🎈
the federalist stinks.. @rajandelman
15K Followers 8K Following Comedy. Producer of @2mbstudios. Old words in @reductress. Instructor at @improvboston. See me at @unioncomedy
Dan Wilbur @DanWilbur
12K Followers 2K Following My 3rd grade teacher told me I had a "great way of ruining things for people." Now I do comedy. My debut album is available now: https://t.co/aA3kYgFcBR
New York Comedy Club @nycomedyclub
14K Followers 2K Following The best stand up in NY with locations in Midtown, East Village and Stamford CT @nyccstamford
Slaughter house guy @DanielJPerafan
6K Followers 3K Following | Actor | V.A. | Comedian | Featured: NYTimes | Seeso | NBC | ComedyClubs: NYCC | SUNY | GWCC | BWCC | QED | C&C | Gotham | GrislyPear
GhostfaceZilla @ZillaVodnas
1K Followers 756 Following Comedian. Native New Yorker. Wu-Tang forever.
Q.E.D. @QEDAstoria
3K Followers 540 Following Voted #1 arts venue in NYC by Time Out readers. 100s of events monthly. Comedy, mics, screenings, storytelling, lectures, meetups, beer, wine, coffee & more!
jes tom 🥀 @jestom
42K Followers 2K Following LESS LONELY 🥀 comedian, horny cherub 👼🏻 writer: ofmd. actor: crush. ig @jesthekid 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️ Less Lonely off-Broadway ⤵️
Matthew Levy @MattLevy51
14K Followers 14K Following Stand up comic. Sketch maker. Newsletter writer. Married to @annaphilomena. Crouton appreciator. Writes profiles. Check Medium link below and DM if interested.
Sarah Tollemache @stollemache
19K Followers 1K Following I’m taping my new special Oct 11th at @grove34 https://t.co/a3F3ZINwdv
Corey Bounds @coreybounds
435 Followers 755 Following
HUCTW, AFSCME 3650 @HUCTW
1K Followers 497 Following HUCTW (AFSCME 3650) is Harvard University’s largest labor union, representing 5000+ staff in every school & department.
Joe Otis @JoeisVeryLit
319 Followers 3K Following Idea Guy. Blogger. Host of #LitPicks, John Cena’s workout buddy, Quiz Bowl Champ, - Pop Culture, NFL, & Chicken Wing Connoisseur, https://t.co/8hgkjYKEdA
foodwolfie @foodwolfie
25 Followers 189 Following
Mike Bradley @LikeMyBread
20 Followers 215 Following
Crunch Franklin @CrunchFranklin
110 Followers 370 Following Don't talk to me until I've had my adrenochrome
Gradient @gradientfan
130 Followers 356 Following
Ryan Mahan @RyanMahanSJR
5K Followers 3K Following Sports reporter for @SJRsports in Springfield, Illinois and @SPIMediaGuild unit chair. Celtics, Avs, Red Sox. This is like the face of Dunkin' Donuts here.
Martin E @hoser33
770 Followers 1K Following Slammy Awarding Winning. Proudly Canadian. Triathlete. #Billsmafia My lifelong dream is to meet @MrT
✨ Darci ✨ @houselvrdarci
1K Followers 3K Following I am mainly here for here for Big Brother and some resistance. ✊🏽🌊
william handley @WHandley4
886 Followers 6K Following
Abraham Valdez👁️.. @AbrahamValdez_
422 Followers 735 Following I play music and I tell jokes. Youth Outreach Director for Marlboro Cigarettes
everythingsfine @_everythngsfine
4K Followers 106 Following Official Twitter for the Everything's Fine Betches IG Account and Diet Starts Tomorrow Podcast
Dominic Ethan @DominicEth9276
483 Followers 2K Following Dedicated to inspiring others to achieve their fitness goals. Let's sweat, push limits, and create a healthier, stronger you! 💪 #Fitness #Wellness
Dawn Kalani Cowle (Sh.. @DawnKCowle
694 Followers 2K Following Funny Fat Babe. Sitcom obsessed. SBU MFA in TV Writing c/o 25.’ Las Vegas native. AFF Second Rounder. Lover of all things leopard print. #PreWGA
Dawn Irena Copley @DawnIrena
63 Followers 1K Following Dawn must shed light on the idea that not all who wander are lost some are still finding their way !
Sarayah's Jewelry @Sarayahsjewelry
103 Followers 256 Following I enjoy constructing the perfect accessories for you .every piece is one of a kind and can also be created just for you or even the one you love .
Cutting Edge Entertai.. @CuttingEdgeEn
401 Followers 2K Following 40 Years experience running a full service entertainment firm. Working direct with customers to book talent , coordinate events and live concerts
Dee @deannalaquian
1K Followers 5K Following Former DB specialist | Aspiring Engineer (CV/Mat Sci) | Artist (Classical/Modern) | Writer (SFF, Horror) | Runner (long distance) | Baker (all mannered goods)
Joshua Clark @joshohjoshoh
277 Followers 2K Following My name is Joshua Clark. I love mobile technology and am just getting into EDC.
conejita de la mota @dabmeowt
185 Followers 174 Following a cat named bunni ｡◕ ‿ ◕｡ ♊️♍️♍️🌙🐇🍑🌸 Insta: jigglypuff_puff_pass ~ I believe in safe spaces to buy weed and you should too !! #newmaskwhodis?
Asa Williams @asavwms
959 Followers 3K Following Brooklyn, Bryant, and Building Back Better. I shoot, design, act, tag...and more. Love arts, biz, sports, media, history. Pay the writers + actors! 🗽 🌊 💙
casey @winedark_c
308 Followers 1K Following top tier dinner party middler. permanently displaced South Carolinian. @ work product marketing manager on Diablo IV @ home hermit writer
Roey DelSignore @RoeyDel
15 Followers 107 Following
Bromeo Santos 🇭�.. @FunnyManStan
1K Followers 2K Following Host of That's My Shit Podcast and aspiring comedian/writer...Mets, Knicks, Giants, Devils, St. Johns BB, Miami FB
Maya May @mayaonstage
15K Followers 3K Following Writer. Comedian. Breaking down the news to make staying informed as stress-free as possible. Mama Bear 🏳️⚧️.
CNS COMEDY @CNSComedy
650 Followers 2K Following Stand up Comic, Writer, Booker at Sunrise Theatre Fort Pierce & in Palm City at the Clubhouse Restaurant in Martin Downs
montizhe @ebesorlecky
102 Followers 646 Following Pyrrhonist. Enjoy a wee bit of ancient philosophy, electronica, meditation and weightlifting. Software developer by trade.
Amanda Crowell, PhD @aj_crowell
1K Followers 1K Following Speaker, Author, Coach | Host, Unleashing Your Great Work podcast
Amy Williamson (@OddC.. @OddCirclesCom
544 Followers 2K Following Have you noticed how everything seems a little impersonal nowadays? We've all become usernames, reference ids and IP addresses. That's why we created Arouund.
May_ AnnaVslett / - �.. @naughtybabyeye
61 Followers 440 Following Defense is the First Act Of War ⚖️ I am Google DUMBDONALDTRUMPBASE snake.1814/ 🌐 https://t.co/tOiiUKOUq8 https://t.co/mId1alceeT… CIF028°141°32.25°
BlackWomeninComedyLaf.. @BWICLaffFest
155 Followers 314 Following Joanna M. Briley created a festival 4 #funnyblackwomen 2 be #seen and #heard in an industry were oftentimes marginalized creatives are left out of the process.
Ryan Van Winkle @rvwable
3K Followers 3K Following artistic director @StAnzaPoetry | citizen schools writer-in-residence @edbookfest (he/him)
nate borgman @nateborgman
2K Followers 2K Following mediocre podcast guest. allegedly wrote a so-called ‘novel’ a so-called ‘parody’ of ‘Ann Rand’. co-host of ‘two dry guys’ pod (defunct - see above).
aaron yin @aaronflarin
14K Followers 828 Following i do comedy videos about asian stuff and politics. @politicasianpod (2021-2023), organizing with @yadarmy1
dgsoccer99 @dgsoccer991
10 Followers 103 Following
Mike @RectangularRug
0 Followers 208 Following
Michael Harrison @MichaelHComedy
2K Followers 367 Following Standup comedian/ Moderator of the hit podcast Character Debates https://t.co/BJRklbjZ4C
gianmarco @GianmarcoSoresi
64K Followers 7K Following “you miss 100% of the shots you take” -my high school basketball coach
Laurie Kilmartin @anylaurie16
106K Followers 6K Following Comedian / Emmy-Nominated & WGA Award-Winning Writer / Seen on After Midnight, Conan, Corden / NYT Best Selling Author / "Cis Woke Grief Sl*t" out now.
Gastor Almonte @GastorAlmonte
2K Followers 636 Following Debut Special ‘Immigrant Made’ out now. https://t.co/MlWN1gCuIk
Christian Finnegan @ChristFinnegan
56K Followers 3K Following Comedian? Listen to my albums/Watch my specials: https://t.co/GSgvaziyUz Read my newsletter, NEW MUSIC FOR OLDS: https://t.co/h2bUkVgf9k
Paul F. Tompkins @PFTompkins
1.2M Followers 3K Following TV & standup & improv & podcasts, hardly any movies Instagram: https://t.co/OWAlzVWjle
Chris Gersbeck @CSGersbeck
4K Followers 3K Following I’m Chris Gersbeck. | @DumbIndustries | Producer @TheMadsAreBack @GoodtimeHour @MaryJoPehl @JackeyNeyman | email: [email protected]
amber rollo @ambercrollo
31K Followers 3K Following
Holy City Sinner @HolyCitySinner
60K Followers 7K Following All things Charleston, SC & more. Winner of multiple Best of Charleston Awards - Twitter (9x), Blog (9x), Podcast, Website, Instagram, & Social Media Influencer
Solidarity with Colum.. @OrangeFreddyG
9K Followers 4K Following Never gonna have a blue check, always gonna be real. Standup Comic and Leftist. 45 million views on Social Media. History Pod⬇️
luisa 🇵🇸 @luisadieznuts
7K Followers 2K Following anthropologist | arts & media worker | @whyyoumadpod | representing no person or institution but myself 🎈
the federalist stinks.. @rajandelman
15K Followers 8K Following Comedy. Producer of @2mbstudios. Old words in @reductress. Instructor at @improvboston. See me at @unioncomedy
New York Comedy Club @nycomedyclub
14K Followers 2K Following The best stand up in NY with locations in Midtown, East Village and Stamford CT @nyccstamford
Dylan Adler @DylanAdler6
40K Followers 2K Following If Yzma was Asian. Writer on @latelateshow @Dylanadler_ on insta He/Him
Mike Birbiglia @birbigs
630K Followers 2K Following My new standup special, The Old Man & The Pool, is available on Netflix. Currently on tour in a city near you.
Slaughter house guy @DanielJPerafan
6K Followers 3K Following | Actor | V.A. | Comedian | Featured: NYTimes | Seeso | NBC | ComedyClubs: NYCC | SUNY | GWCC | BWCC | QED | C&C | Gotham | GrislyPear
Todd Barry @toddbarry
300K Followers 1K Following YouTube: DOMESTIC SHORTHAIR Netflix: SPICY HONEY Prime: THE CROWD WORK TOUR Book: THANK YOU FOR COMING TO HATTIESBURG https://t.co/AgBudWd5Ff & @ToddBarryPdcast
GhostfaceZilla @ZillaVodnas
1K Followers 756 Following Comedian. Native New Yorker. Wu-Tang forever.
Dusty Slay @dustyslay
17K Followers 735 Following New full one hour special “Workin’ Man” streaming now on Netflix. Click the link below for tickets:
everythingsfine @_everythngsfine
4K Followers 106 Following Official Twitter for the Everything's Fine Betches IG Account and Diet Starts Tomorrow Podcast
Zak Williams @zakwilliams
153K Followers 2K Following Mental Health Advocate. Co-Founder & CEO @youcanpym. Chairman @BC2M. Trustee @UnitedGMH.
TeamYouTube @TeamYouTube
1.8M Followers 2K Following updates & answers from the team bringing you YouTube, helping in: english, español, português, deutsch, français, 日本語, indonesian, العربية, हिंदी, 한국어
conejita de la mota @dabmeowt
185 Followers 174 Following a cat named bunni ｡◕ ‿ ◕｡ ♊️♍️♍️🌙🐇🍑🌸 Insta: jigglypuff_puff_pass ~ I believe in safe spaces to buy weed and you should too !! #newmaskwhodis?
Kyle Anderson @DangerAnderson
2K Followers 1K Following Emmy winning Writer. Comedian. Work featured in Entertainment Weekly and Rolling Stone. I also make YouTube documentaries.
Riker Googling @RikerGoogling
111K Followers 2 Following No longer permitted to post here. (Written and automated by @JoeSondow) Mastodon: @[email protected] Bluesky: @RikerGoogling.bsky.social
Eventbrite Help @eventbritehelp
10K Followers 1K Following We’re here to help event creators with the tools they need to create, host & manage their events. Please follow to DM us
Kimberly 🧜🏻�.. @KimberlyDinaro
8K Followers 2K Following Stand-up mermaid & Goddess of unemployed bartenders. Bylines: @someecards, @Betches_Sup, @betchesluvthis, @reductress
aaron yin @aaronflarin
14K Followers 828 Following i do comedy videos about asian stuff and politics. @politicasianpod (2021-2023), organizing with @yadarmy1
malcolm in the middle.. @OutOfCMalcolm
224K Followers 11 Following Join the Malcolm in the Middle community ! 📺
Django Gold @django
19K Followers 1K Following comedic entity // formerly for Colbert, the Onion // watch BAG OF TRICKS, link below
Aubrey Gordon isn’t.. @yrfatfriend
130K Followers 621 Following Cohost of @MaintenancePod. Author of 2 books, working on a third. I’m in @yrfatfriendfilm. Find me on instagram & bsky, I’m not here anymore!
Huge Ma @turbovax
144K Followers 712 Following former candidate for state assembly and vax twitter bot
Calvin S. Cato @catocalvin
3K Followers 2K Following Comedian/actor/writer/storyteller/game show winner/perma-temp He/Him/His Give this kid a TV sitcom! - VP of HBO, 2024
Maria Bamford @mariabamfoo
215K Followers 773 Following Stand-Up Comedy Since the 1900s 📚 Pre-Order Scott's & My Graphic Novel 📚 Tour Dates on website! Want to come to a show but No $? Ariamaamfordba@gmail
The Revolution Comedy.. @RevComedyPod
72 Followers 295 Following Real talk. Real Action. Welcome to the new Revolution Podcast: Women/NB comedians get real, and also highlight activism resources for you at home!
Jillian the Needlessl.. @holycityfangirl
531 Followers 743 Following One part Miranda Hobbes, one part Britta Perry, Eliza Hamilton to taste and you have me. Co-host of Welcome to Greendale: A Community Podcast. she/her/hers.
Veronica Garza @veros_broke
2K Followers 872 Following Brooklyn-based stand up comedian and regulation hottie.
Matt Storrs @MTStorrs
2K Followers 2K Following Humor Person / Storyteller / Rule Bender / Mattsplaining Podcast / Books Read This Year: 10
✨ Tristan Miller✨ @TristanJMiller1
2K Followers 1K Following Movies - Comedy - Mental Health Host of Focus Testing + @adcpod Gender/Agnostic
Mrs. Poops McClurr @MrsPoopsMcClurr
513 Followers 1K Following Writer, singer, actor, producer, collaborator. She/Her 💋🌈⭐️💕
Qᴜɪɴɴ Cᴀʀᴜ�.. @FreckledChicano
729 Followers 2K Following Cʜɪᴄᴀɴᴏ | Nᴏᴡ: Gᴏᴠᴇʀɴᴍᴇɴᴛ @gt_law Fᴏʀᴍᴇʀ: @nycMayorsOffice @nycFOOD @BetoORourke @mayorsPEU Gʀᴀᴅ Sᴛᴜᴅᴇɴᴛ: @Harvard #ElPasoStrong ᴍʏ ᴏᴡɴ ʙᴀᴅ ʟᴇғᴛʏ ᴏᴘɪɴɪᴏɴs
graham techler @gr8h8m_t3chl3r
4K Followers 937 Following new yorker, mcsweeney’s, ucb, plays for @lessthanrent
Maria Wojciechowski @RiaWojo
4K Followers 931 Following Comedian. Writer. Sad girl. Happy girl. I’m funny once every 20 tweets. Alabama born. All typos are my own. *Woj-a-cow-ski*
Sharon Spell @SharonSpell
3K Followers 2K Following Award winning writer & comedian in NYC. She/Her. On deck: more scripts.
Kristin Manna @KristinEManna
771 Followers 298 Following writer and first grade science fair winner. @mcsweeneys, @NewYorker
Carolines on Broadway @CarolinesonBway
18K Followers 2K Following The First Name In Comedy. #MakeNYLaugh
butterboycomedy @butterboycomedy
1K Followers 664 Following A weekly comedy showcase hosted by Jo Firestone, @aparnapkin & @maevehiggins | Mondays at 8pm at @littlefieldnyc
Frank Conniff @FrankConniff
76K Followers 6K Following Writer, Comedian, TV's Frank | Author of 10 Books https://t.co/3XczIQUw45
girl @maggielalley
510 Followers 526 Following Just a pretty cool girl trying to make it in this crazy city 😜
Star Trek Minus Conte.. @NoContextTrek
106K Followers 161 Following Double dumbass on you, and so forth. (These are all real) #StarTrek🖖🏽 Always read the #AltText. Also on mastodon and bsky if you fancy that.
Rent the Runway Suppo.. @rtrhelp
2K Followers 1 Following We’re here to help with questions about your @renttherunway membership or order! Available Mon-Fri, 9AM-8PM EST; Sat-Sun, 9AM-6PM.
Erin Maguire @erinmofficial
656 Followers 744 Following Comedian. Scribe. Ginger. All around good time gal. subscribe to my podcast @dearpodofficial or come see me live. I’m sexier in person.
Caitlin Reese ⚡️ @TheCaitlinReese
10K Followers 849 Following Buy my new standup album Erotic Associate! ✨ Amazon Prime. NBC. The Onion. Demi/Pan.
♥ Gloria Calderón .. @everythingloria
62K Followers 2K Following Showrunner/Director/Writer/Actor @onedayatatime @withloveonprime #TheHorrorOfDoloresRoach Mom, Wife @davekellett Proud @womenshistory Ambassador🇨🇺 🇺🇸
Zoe @zoe_murray13
84 Followers 91 Following
Fran Drescher @frandrescher
291K Followers 19K Following President @SAGAFTRA Actor/Writer/Creator/Producer. Founder-President https://t.co/mg0ThtyCM0 Fighter 4 Diversity/Ecology/Unity ☮️❤️🌈🙏🏾Stars. They’re just like us.
the director of celebrity apology videos finally speaks
i got heckled last night and a massive black dude stood up and threatened the heckler with a chair. i love my fans!!!!!
@gundrymd_ Do you recommend unsweetened coconut milk?
you’re next @chrisdelia
Danny Masterson has been sentenced to 30 years in prison, after being convicted for rape earlier this year. bit.ly/3qWl5C9
Hello from the desk where I wrote my memoir, #MakingItSo. After years spent writing here, it's hard to believe that today marks one month until my book will be released...! Thank you to everyone who has already ordered your copy, and I'll see you on tour this October.…
Thanks, good to know. Can I just get my lunch, please?
When my son grows up, he’s going to be so sad to learn that all of the songs I sing to him don’t actually have his name as the only lyric.
My fitness goal is to be in a workout out video as the modifier. “And to your left is Kristin. She refuses to jump.”
Happy 72nd Dad! Was remembering how much I used to love that look you'd give. That look with a mischievous, loving grin that your friends and loved ones knew so well. Joyous and curious and wondrous. Miss you and love you forever!
When my data bar say “SOS” it’s like calm down drama queen
b i t c h y e s ✨
Proudly thick, newly single and ready to take over the world one mo’ment at a time. Survival of the Thickest comes to Netflix July 13th.
I will never, ever give a shit what you asked ChatGPT to do.
Last week, I ordered a small coffee. The barista said they were out of small & asked if a large was ok. I said yes. Then she charged me for a large. My inner rage boiled, but I said nothing. Instead, I've thought about it nonstop for 5 days, letting it rot within me.
@laurenkrass I called Steak Frites to ask if they have AC and they said I was the third caller inspired by your tweet. 😆
Join us for our next Ladies of Comedy Assocation Industry Showcase presented by @LadiesofComedy and @HRTSassocNY & hosted by @bonnieqcomedy on Sunday, March 26th @ 3PM following our NYC Talent March Mixer + Q&A! Get tickets: newyorkcomedyclub.com/.../loca-indus…
I get that we live in an attention economy and this stuff is readymade discourse. But man, what a shitty place for comedy to be in.
LOOK OUT!!! #SoHelpMeTodd is back, and a new episode starts NOW @CBS and @paramountplus! @SoHelpMeCBS
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