VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish
For everything VBP, including books, clothes, mugs, cards, calendars & contact: https://t.co/51E7az46a4 Written by @RobTemple101 linktr.ee/verybritishpro… Cambridge, England Joined December 2012-
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“We’re going out tonight if you fancy it?” Me texting back, in my pyjamas, climbing into bed, reaching for my eye mask, about to turn my phone to do not disturb: “okay, might see you down there!”
Big fan of pencilling.
Happy Saturday. Hope you’re enjoying a mug of something hot (tea, preferably). verybritishproblemstshirts.com/collection/ver…
Slightly change a film quote to make it very British. I’ll go first: Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a monkeys.
My shopping routine: 1. Arrive at till with pile of loose items and realise I’ve forgotten my bag 2. Refuse 40p carrier bag 3. Waddle to car with food stacked and balanced up my torso and held in place under my chin 4. Remember my keys are in my pocket 5. Very carefully free…
10pm: “So tired, going to bed” 3am and 356 Wikipedia pages later: “Ah so that's why there are holes in Swiss cheese…”
What do you call this in your household?
Who had this absolute legend? On its own little table. “Hello, 380534”. Twiddling the springy cable while you talked. Good times.
Top 30 British expressions: 1. Right, what’s all this then? 2. Don’t get your knickers in a twist 3. All gone pear-shaped 4. I’m in a bit of a pickle 5. It’s not my cup of tea 6. I’m chuffed to bits 7. I’m full of beans 8. Happy as Larry 9. What a load of… 10. He’s off…
Totally stealing this insult from Shakespeare
What’s something that’ll make a British person say, “ooh, someone’s doing alright for themselves”? Someone said it to me because I had some M&S biscuits.
Being unable to ask a stranger a question without first saying “excuse me, hi, sorry…”
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@SoVeryBritish Making my first cup of coffee before sunrise on a large pan on the edge of the Kalahari desert in South Africa.
@SoVeryBritish Maybe record it and watch the rest later, wrapped up in that silver foil stuff. Nobody would judge.
@SoVeryBritish If I suddenly saw a co-worker next to me and they started making polite small talk.
@SoVeryBritish I mean, a big bee is a pretty impressive sight 🐝
@SoVeryBritish British food in a foreign supermarket
@SoVeryBritish I wonder if their annual industry awards do is called ‘The Parkies’?…
@SoVeryBritish I love how it’s described as “Award Winning”, when this “Award” is given to everyone who meets a very basic criteria…
@SoVeryBritish @MsSpydaSam In East Anglia, we bask in the early sunrise and worry not about whether we're north or south.
@SoVeryBritish @Noelgsuperman I say extra mature myself.
@SoVeryBritish @MsSpydaSam As a fellow East Anglian, we’re definitely South!
@SoVeryBritish I’m in Lincolnshire and get called a bloody northerner/bloody southerner lots
@SoVeryBritish And later on could’t understand why you didn’t meet up sooner after having such a good time but then wait over a year before doing it again
@SoVeryBritish Cut it in half, but too impatient to wait so stick straight in, rendering the initial cutting of the roaster pointless.
@SoVeryBritish Been there, done that…about five minutes ago. I am now unable to taste anything on the plate…😂🤦♂️
@SoVeryBritish One of these would make it all better.
@SoVeryBritish Walking through my local train station, someone asked me where the toilets were. I gave perfectly reasonable directions, they looked at the way I'd pointed, looked back at me and then shook their head in disgust 🤷♂️
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