Jessie Cannizzaro @JessCannizzaro
Actor | Comedy Writer. Original Sally in @PuffsPlay off-Bway. Proud graduate of Space Camp. jessiecannizzaro.com New York, NY Joined May 2013-
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We ❤️ holiday rom-coms so much that we went ahead made our very own, thankyouverymuch. Love in Plane Sight arrives November 16 at united.com and onboard December 1.
ICYMI: @united spins "Love in Plane Sight" for the festive season. bit.ly/40LaKWX
Baby on board? With what? What’s he down for
Please welcome @JessCannizzaro! Jessie is making their WHAT Debut as Mary Jane Hanrahan in Jesus Hopped the A Train. This show is only on stage through June 17th, don't miss it! Get your tickets now! ow.ly/W4rL50OJJ8q #capecod #pulitzer #StephenAdlyGuirgis
Get yourself a girl that can do both
I just said “have a good night” to the bodega guy. it is 1pm on a sunday
Smithereens are basically the most classic thing to be blasted into
life can be pretty cool because you can get a bagel. but there’s also the horrors
“With a name like Smuckers it has to be good” why. Why tho. Literally what about the name Smuckers says good to you
Something about putting a paper towel in the microwave just doesn’t sit right with me
Why does my CityMD have a “stand here” sign taped just below this poster. Are they gonna measure my height against the 9/11 memorial lights??
How long has it been since I’ve done laundry? Well I’m wearing a bikini as underwear today, so
Couldn’t remember the words “dental hygiene” so just asked this CVS employee where they keep the “tooth stuff”
What’s my most played song on Spotify? That’s easy babe, it’s “8 Hours of 432hz Healing Frequency Meditation Music For Deep Sleep” by the band 8 Hour Sleep Music
Whispering nervously to the Rite Aid employee: “umm which kind do you recommend for somebody’s first time”
Ginny Hogan_ @ginnyhogan_
165K Followers 6K Following thank you for bearing with me, links to everything belowely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl
145K Followers 3K Following tv/film writer, comic, queer. host @podshamespiral, copy @iamthirtyaf & co-host @gayshamecomedy- next show 4/16 @unionhallny! mgmt: @zerogravitymgmtPuffs @PuffsPlay
3K Followers 339 Following We’re Wizards! Bringing you magic based comedy since 2015. Available on @itunes & @amazon & @broadwayhd & @todaytixgianmarco @GianmarcoSoresi
64K Followers 7K Following “you miss 100% of the shots you take” -my high school basketball coachA.J. Ditty's Done It .. @TheFuzzyMask
877 Followers 677 Following (A.J. Ditty) is not a puppeteer. - The New York Times One-Third of @TWOAPW // Original Narrator of @PuffsPlay (he/him)Chris Murphy @christress
16K Followers 1K Following staff writer @vanityfair | good time girl, actress, comedienne | U.S Senator from Connecticut | he/him |Brian Metolius @BrianMetolius
594 Followers 356 Following Composer/Person of Puffs and Night of the Coconut and WITCHES?! IN SALEM?! - Payakan stan - Doof Warrior School GraduateMax Gross ☻ @maxgotjokes
18K Followers 2K Following Headlines @Reductress, features @TheOnion. Words @Slate @Autostraddle and more. The nation’s foremost scholar on “And Just Like That.” He/himArielle Dundas @ArielleDundas
14K Followers 4K Following My niche is that I’m funny and I have interesting opinions. She/her. Stardew valley streamer. ADHD. typos are part of my brand.cass city @HeavenlyGrandpa
27K Followers 869 Following i’m cassidy kulhanek i’m a comedian and my dad is very proud of me!Gabe Mollica @GabeMollica
2K Followers 3K Following “Solo: a show about friendship” Off-Broadway. Listen to Ep. 810 of This American Life. ➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️Tix ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️Matthew Levy @MattLevy51
14K Followers 14K Following Stand up comic. Sketch maker. Newsletter writer. Married to @annaphilomena. Crouton appreciator. Writes profiles. Check Medium link below and DM if interested.Georgia Shenk @GeorgiaShenk
17K Followers 2K Following Writer + Antisocialite ✿ @reductress ✿ @TheSecondCity trained ✿ say [email protected]Iris✨ @Jest_Iris
18K Followers 2K Following out of pocket bc my pants don't have any NYC Comedian Writer Gamer Jewish af IG: jest.iris | words in @Reductress & @HardDriveMag featured in @adweekChas LiBretto @ChasLiBretto
1K Followers 5K Followingmeredith @dietz_meredith
18K Followers 2K Following too tired to pee, too full of piss to sleep. staff writer @lifehacker. headline contributor @TheOnion @reductress.seynique — detroit .. @seynique
11K Followers 1K Following comedian. writer. podcaster. | she/her co-host of @everybodywspod & @wediefirstpod seyniquesmythecomedy @ https://t.co/NqCyCotNYiRosa @humancomedian
3K Followers 1K Following disgraced CRISCO heiress *comedian*comedienne*third-thing* @psychicfriendz she/herJason @CGF0fDC7RNc8A2Z
56 Followers 1K Following 風雨を経験しなければ、虹を見ることはできない。磨かれなければ、ダイヤモンドになることはできない。堅持して、奮闘して、夢はついに実現します!頑張って!Andy Boyd @andy_boyd
239 Followers 405 Following playwright, check me out on NPX! https://t.co/nC2n43a9oHalevin421 @alevin421
60 Followers 294 FollowingChris Roy 🇺🇦 �.. @ChrisRoy78
1K Followers 3K Following “Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.” ― Aldous Huxley 🇺🇸🇨🇦🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️Lee @roothyez6735
100 Followers 1K FollowingVeers77 @veers77
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39 Followers 1K FollowingThe Frugal Gardener #.. @frugalgardeners
224 Followers 230 Following Follow me for gardening hacks. Check out my YouTube channel. #gardening #blackgardener IG: frugalgardenerKathleen O'Grady @kathleenogrady
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16 Followers 236 Following Margaux, jeune étudiante de 22 ans. 1m75, 37 de pointure. Je vends des photos de mes pieds en DM pour les adorateurs de beaux pieds 🤭Nothyph @nothyph26057
32 Followers 331 FollowingMike 🛠️ ThatEngi.. @ThatEngin3rD
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831 Followers 386 Following Allow yourself to feel anger, pain and resentment. Relax and let it go with love. :) fashion business woman 💖 love life Positive and optimistic ☺Lawrence Lee @Lawrence446
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2K Followers 5K Following Premiere theatre venue dedicated to Sci-Fi + Fantasy Performance • Producers of Immersive @moonriselarp • Check out our YouTube Channel for digital contentshofia❤ @Shofia87
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16K Followers 12K Following UPRH’24 || Incoming PhD student at UConn || NSF GRFP Fellow ||biologist, R enthusiast, tech lover and fan of pretty graphs || 🇵🇷🏳️🌈Aleks Arcabascio @a1z0
432 Followers 2K Following The only New Yorker in LA | Writer/Producer | Available Only At Participating McDonald’sACORN Players @ACORNPlayersLaf
128 Followers 453 Following All Colors Of the Rainbow are Necessary! An inclusivity-forward theatre company. Voted Best Theatre Company 2024 - best of the Wabash!Andrew Farmer @thatsajellyfish
11K Followers 929 FollowingCathryn Lim @CathrynLim_
195 Followers 377 Following "Waiting for the opportunity to fool the people, who are wise to create opportunities "drunk dad @JimmyRepeat
605 Followers 1K Following ABC: always be creating. @mistergif make cool things for cool people.☻ @tdotjdot3
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7 Followers 38 FollowingTony Barletta @barletta_tony
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9 Followers 25 FollowingMidnite Mausoleum @midnitemauso
1K Followers 443 Following official page for MIDNITE MAUSOLEUM hosted by Marlena Midnite and her friends. WQAD NEWS 8 -MyTV 8-3, sometimes WRCT 18 #horrorhost #broadcast #televisionStephen @Stephen58204656
367 Followers 5K FollowingMayra Diaz-Garcia @MayraMoxie
54 Followers 75 Following I hate when people don't understand my sarcasm. They ruin everything.MrPositivesPPartyPant.. @KingSpadeMdlHut
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3K Followers 2K Following #AlabamaGoatPlay is Pulitzer-Nominated!!! I tell "ache" stories #MaytagVirgin • #TheGulf • #Alabaster • #TheLastWideOpenGlen Willis @willis_glen
4K Followers 5K Following USAF Veteran Basketball Stuff: @ATLand29 (alternate governor), Coach.Biden I don’t want .. @Michael90082929
165 Followers 456 Following The democrats are going to mail out vouchers for babble and then charge us but not b4 taxing the heck out of us!Siltcoos Duck @OregonDannon
92 Followers 115 Following College, 9-11, Army (in that order). Anthropologist. UofO to PSU to Hayward to UNR. Lake life. Crusher of ignorant/racist/ethnocentric BS. Smiter of terroristsSydney Battle @SydneyBattle
76K Followers 673 Following writer/actor/ghoul • mgmt: 3arts • venmo: sydney-battleGinny Hogan_ @ginnyhogan_
165K Followers 6K Following thank you for bearing with me, links to everything belowely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl
145K Followers 3K Following tv/film writer, comic, queer. host @podshamespiral, copy @iamthirtyaf & co-host @gayshamecomedy- next show 4/16 @unionhallny! mgmt: @zerogravitymgmtDylan Adler @DylanAdler6
40K Followers 2K Following If Yzma was Asian. Writer on @latelateshow @Dylanadler_ on insta He/HimAkilah Hughes @AkilahObviously
223K Followers 3K Following I miss Neopets. | Founding Host of ‘What a Day’ from @crookedmedia | @SundanceOrg Alum | OBVIOUSLY is out NOW📗jes tom 🥀 @jestom
42K Followers 2K Following LESS LONELY 🥀 comedian, horny cherub 👼🏻 writer: ofmd. actor: crush. ig @jesthekid 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️ Less Lonely off-Broadway ⤵️Puffs @PuffsPlay
3K Followers 339 Following We’re Wizards! Bringing you magic based comedy since 2015. Available on @itunes & @amazon & @broadwayhd & @todaytixgianmarco @GianmarcoSoresi
64K Followers 7K Following “you miss 100% of the shots you take” -my high school basketball coachA.J. Ditty's Done It .. @TheFuzzyMask
877 Followers 677 Following (A.J. Ditty) is not a puppeteer. - The New York Times One-Third of @TWOAPW // Original Narrator of @PuffsPlay (he/him)Chris Murphy @christress
16K Followers 1K Following staff writer @vanityfair | good time girl, actress, comedienne | U.S Senator from Connecticut | he/him |Brian Metolius @BrianMetolius
594 Followers 356 Following Composer/Person of Puffs and Night of the Coconut and WITCHES?! IN SALEM?! - Payakan stan - Doof Warrior School GraduateMax Gross ☻ @maxgotjokes
18K Followers 2K Following Headlines @Reductress, features @TheOnion. Words @Slate @Autostraddle and more. The nation’s foremost scholar on “And Just Like That.” He/himArielle Dundas @ArielleDundas
14K Followers 4K Following My niche is that I’m funny and I have interesting opinions. She/her. Stardew valley streamer. ADHD. typos are part of my brand.danielle weisberg for.. @danielleweisber
32K Followers 969 Following award-nominated tv writer, nap slut, the best goddamn dancer in the American Ballet Academy | she/her | [email protected]cass city @HeavenlyGrandpa
27K Followers 869 Following i’m cassidy kulhanek i’m a comedian and my dad is very proud of me!Connor Ratliff 🎭 @connorratliff
22K Followers 5K Following Webby Award-winning Actor/Comedian/Podcaster • Mr. Rapp in @MeanGirls • @DeadEyespodcast 💀👁👁 • @TinyDinosPod 🦕 • @GLucasTalkShow • @RAAAATSCRAPSGabe Mollica @GabeMollica
2K Followers 3K Following “Solo: a show about friendship” Off-Broadway. Listen to Ep. 810 of This American Life. ➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️Tix ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️Barrett Leddy 💡 @barrettleddy
3K Followers 2K Following Audie Award-winning Voice Actor & Singer • #YuGiOh • #Pokémon • Iago in #LEGODisneyPrincessAleks Arcabascio @a1z0
432 Followers 2K Following The only New Yorker in LA | Writer/Producer | Available Only At Participating McDonald’sChas LiBretto @ChasLiBretto
1K Followers 5K FollowingAudrey Cefaly - Playw.. @alcefaly
3K Followers 2K Following #AlabamaGoatPlay is Pulitzer-Nominated!!! I tell "ache" stories #MaytagVirgin • #TheGulf • #Alabaster • #TheLastWideOpenJorts (and Jean) @JortsTheCat
221K Followers 2K Following Jorts the cat. Jean helps me. [email protected]Shame Spiral Podcast @podshamespiral
3K Followers 278 Following therapist-turned-comedian @elykreimendahl & guests on what makes them SPIRAL. like listening in on a therapy session, but funny ❤️Casey Wortmann/ NYC A.. @wortsey
134 Followers 113 FollowingCopaganda! @CopagandaPod
452 Followers 1K Following A comedy podcast where we rewatch cop movies to learn about policing in America with your host @NiccoloAeed Listen now wherever you get podcasts.Elizabeth McMullen @elizalmcmullen
783 Followers 861 Following Ag PR Maven. she/her. I tweet a lot about the @backstreetboys, cows & mental health.Mark Jacobson @sirmarkofj
832 Followers 792 Following A giddy thing. Actor : Improviser : VO Goofus. 🗣️🎙️ #Spiderman2PS5, etc. 🎬 @WTChippendales, #12DaysOfXmasEve, #57Seconds, etc. https://t.co/Ms7U1d8j5cJenny Arimoto @jennyarimoto
2K Followers 338 Following senator for the great state of idaho • lil joke writerTaietsarón:sere @tai_leclaire
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474 Followers 177 Following Creator of @ladiesbronche & #ShitSpanishGirlsSay. Vámonos extended til June 4 @INTAR TheatreNick Martorelli @NickMartorelli
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10K Followers 1K Following We cultivate, curate, and elevate underrepresented voices through our talent development programs and DE&I efforts across the NBCU TV portfolio.brad aldous @bradlicious
498 Followers 359 Following actor. writer. director. comic. soccer fanatic. NYCFC. Dortmund. Man. U.Matt Thurm @thewThurm
195 Followers 508 FollowingJason Hehir @jasonmhehir
15K Followers 577 Following Dir/Prod: The Last Dance (Netflix), Murder In Boston (HBO), Andre The Giant (HBO), The Fab Five (ESPN), The '85 Bears (ESPN)NASA's Perseverance M.. @NASAPersevere
3.1M Followers 40 Following NASA Mars rover, exploring since February 2021. Hobbies: Photography, collecting rocks, off-roading. 🚀 Team HQ @NASAJPL (Verification: https://t.co/b0WrcSJeU0)Jack Smart @JackSmartWrites
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12K Followers 1K Following head of creative @wwwsublimeapp writer of Both Are True, a top 10 humor newsletter https://t.co/z02tACRJb3allison tanenhaus @atanenhaus
6K Followers 5K Following 🍭 Trippy Glitch Art and Op Art (since 2015) 😻 Cats (since idk) 🐈⬛ she/herAlanna Darby (she/her.. @alannastarby
224 Followers 713 Following 🫦 She/Her 🏳️⚧️ Actor/ Writer/ Singer/ Witch/ Way more popular on TikTokTom Ciaccio @TomTeeVee
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27K Followers 2K Following The most recognized brand in comedy for over 50 yearsDaniel Max Bonventre @DanBonventre
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9K Followers 7K Following The Humor Magazine. The Standard In American Immaturity. Editor-in-Chief @MartyDundics @TheWebbyAwards Nominated 🏆Buy print or digital issues, subscribe today!Jon Moses @jonmosesvocals
189K Followers 8K Following 👨👧👦 Dad first 🎭 Theatre enthusiast 🎤 TV personality & Singer 📈 ‘Top 5 Charting’ musician 🕴️#MenStyle |💆♂️#Skincare advocate | 📧 [email protected]Ben Ratner @BenMakesTV
8K Followers 5K Following My four major TV credits: @TeamCoco, @60minutes, a @BurgerKing commercial & @Elmo’s World. Now: @Boston25. Past: @NeilTyson, @AlRoker, @JimCramer, @SInow, @CNNPaula Vogel @VogelPaula
18K Followers 397 Following Proudly unverified by gatekeepers at twitter. playwright. mentor. teacher. lover of cardigan welsh corgis. Founder of Bard at the Gate: https://t.co/4y4mwJBQ04Sam Spero @SRSpero
2K Followers 1K Following Comedy @ IAG, Sports Contrib @TheOnion, Headline Contrib at @ClickHole & @Reductress, pubbed by @newyorkerhumor @mcsweeneys & more. Really want a samurai sword.andrew barlow @sirbizlow
891 Followers 316 Following actor, comedian. also a CODA. contributor for @reductress, @funcdeadzineMeredith Hackman @Big_Mer
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4K Followers 2K Following ✨writer | director | redhead ✨ny/la by way of ky✨humanitas finalist✨ nicholl top 15%✨@theblcklst recommended✨ she/her ⛸🥃🌳🧁📖Georgia Shenk’s Del.. @georgiadeleted
606 Followers 997 Following Tweets that Georgia Shenk deleted. Submissions welcome.St. Nell's @StNells
827 Followers 1K Following St. Nell's Humor Writing Residency*. The People's Harlot. *for marginalized genders Follow for info on the residency, classes**, and shows**! **open to alli think that we as a society are slowly losing the battle against people who think it's ok to pull out their phones at the movie theater and we need to fight back
sometimes sitting next to someone in an amc with the recliners is a little too intimate like why must we lie next to each other as man lies with wife
when I was born I came out perfectly dry, no goop!
Bluey referenced “mitochondria” and I immediately said to my 4yo “the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell” like a sleeper agent who just heard their activation phrase
oh no grief isn’t linear and now i’m crying listening to pink pony club in the baking section
humiliating. looks like shit. yet another massive W for earth, the best planet in the universe
we’ve seen eclipses on earth, so here’s an eclipse from mars. this is mars’s moon phobos eclipsing the sun.
after 4 sneezes in a row you have to be put down
if the moon can block the whole entire sun, surely you can block him and move on
that was a lovely hourlong break from sending emails to collectively experience a rare cosmic event that reminds us how minuscule and futile 90% of our daily concerns actually are! anyway now i'm required to go back to sending emails
Oops I did it again 🤭 #TotalSolarEclipse
I was in the pharmacy line at cvs and everyone was discussing the earthquake when the emergency alert went off so people started screaming "another one"!!! the old woman behind me in line said "Mother Earth has come to collect" which I'll be thinking about for the rest of my life
calling it the NYC earthquake when the epicenter was in NJ. perfect. no notes.
I’ll admit I’ve got some pretty severe attachment issues for someone who was repeatedly abandoned
Every person in NYC immediately thought a construction crew was about to accidentally kill them
I DON’T WANT TO DIE IN A STUDIO APARTMENT
Yelling "I'M WALKING HERE" at a tectonic plate
first time I saw this, I thought it was hilarious so I showed it to my French friends. they did not laugh they were all dead serious tearing up at it being like "ah oui I remember zis"
Happy birthday, Serge Gainsbourg! In 1988, French children’s choir, Les Petits Chanteurs d’Asnières pay tribute to a very emotional Serge Gainsbourg with his song “Je suis venu te dire que je m’en vais,” live on TV.