Pjörk🐷 @NicoleConlan
writer for @TheDailyShow, personal assistant to my dog podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the… Joined April 2009-
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skill issue for those men. the correct answer is it’s impossible to have a favorite bird. if I said barred owl, I would feel shame the next time I saw a Canada warbler, or a Say’s phoebe, or an American kestrel. I’m already feeling stress about naming some birds and not others!
skill issue for those men. the correct answer is it’s impossible to have a favorite bird. if I said barred owl, I would feel shame the next time I saw a Canada warbler, or a Say’s phoebe, or an American kestrel. I’m already feeling stress about naming some birds and not others!
terrible news for ivy league grads who were hoping to move to lakewood washington to help a single 70 year old man run a geocities website
terrible news for ivy league grads who were hoping to move to lakewood washington to help a single 70 year old man run a geocities website
It doesn't really matter whether you, personally, believe climate change is a threat. Your insurance company knows what's in store for the future, and they're going to charge you the real cost of insuring your home in a wildfire zone. sfchronicle.com/climate/articl…
this routine is especially odd when it comes from people like seinfeld or john cleese, whose career-defining work has mostly aged perfectly well and has never really been cancelled or controversial
this routine is especially odd when it comes from people like seinfeld or john cleese, whose career-defining work has mostly aged perfectly well and has never really been cancelled or controversial
One thing the student protests bring into focus is that American authoritarianism doesn’t flow from Trump.
Bought by a new company formed by Onion fans who named said company after an Onion bit seems like about as good of a sign as you can get in digital media these days
Bought by a new company formed by Onion fans who named said company after an Onion bit seems like about as good of a sign as you can get in digital media these days
hulu is one of my favorite streaming apps just because they don’t have autoplay when you’re trying to scroll through shit. i hate autoplay
Made it about 3 paragraphs into this piece about private equity meddling with veterinary care before blood started pouring out of my eyes theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/…
I dug into the budget sheets to have a look at the realities of modern day touring costs for a bunch of artists. Such is the struggle for many established acts to tour profitably, it’s been declared a cost of touring crisis. theguardian.com/music/2024/apr…
You need to be dilettantemaxxing. You need to be dabbling in various fields and pursuits. Half-heartedly exploring beekeeping. Reading the first two chapters of a physics textbook. Knitting 2/3 of a glove. You need to be abandoning projects
Hmmm there are about 487 shows and movies I'm behind on and need to watch but what if i watched breaking bad again x.com/douggernaut_2/…
Hmmm there are about 487 shows and movies I'm behind on and need to watch but what if i watched breaking bad again x.com/douggernaut_2/…
Heavy private vehicles should be banned. You should require an additional, professional licence to drive anything heavier than 2t.
Heavy private vehicles should be banned. You should require an additional, professional licence to drive anything heavier than 2t.
Atlantic Terminal Applebees stays winning x.com/tomgara/status…
Atlantic Terminal Applebees stays winning x.com/tomgara/status…
*thumbs in suspenders* Now lissen heyuh, boy. Of all the clas—I say, of all the classes that stand face ta' face with the boor-schwa-zee today, the proletariat ALONE is a really revolutionary class...
*thumbs in suspenders* Now lissen heyuh, boy. Of all the clas—I say, of all the classes that stand face ta' face with the boor-schwa-zee today, the proletariat ALONE is a really revolutionary class...
It's rare to find a question where there is so obviously a correct and winning answer x.com/scriptsbyjames…
It's rare to find a question where there is so obviously a correct and winning answer x.com/scriptsbyjames… https://t.co/NIgsNOa1mS
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i’m so fascinated by this hideous dance move jojo siwa keeps doing that i had to make a montage of it
this is a bit but also part of the truth. the point of this generation of right wing agitprop is to trap young men in a sort of bigoted stasis. Keep them from meeting people and learning lessons that might make it possible for them to have a life. Men who grow aren't profitable
I'd go as so far as to say all my boys are thoughtful enough to have a favorite bird that's not an eagle. I've never met an eagle guy. Couldn't possibly.
Are there any men out there who have a favorite bird that is not an eagle? Every single man I have ever asked said "eagle".
The most unrealistic thing about The Sopranos is that her name is “Meadow.” No way in hell Tony and Carmella had a baby girl in 1982 in New Jersey and didn’t name her Gianna Marie.
my favorite aspect of the anti 15-minute-city freaks is they seem to think you’ll be locked into a 15 minute radius and be executed if you leave that zone
When arguing with a 15 minute city advocate, ask them “What happens if I get the opportunity of a lifetime…my dream job, 30 minutes away by car?” The mental gymnastics that ensue demonstrate how you just can’t plan and control something as complex as human society.
remarkable how much this misunderstands the power and utility of speech. the students are not trying to persuade administration using reason and logic. they have their position, you have yours, and they are exerting their political power in order to win.
@Alexa_Curtis Wrong app, I think you intended to post this on LinkedIn.
Lol at Elliott Abrams getting Chotinered. newyorker.com/news/q-and-a/e…
@Mr_Considerate man i hope people never stop picking up the phone to this guy
kinda wild how quickly the complaints went from "student protesters are harassing zionist students" to "student protesters refuse to harass zionists adults who are hanging around campus for some reason"
Don’t mind me. Just sitting on a bench reading at Vanderbilt next to the “Palestinian Solidarity Encampment” with my huge Israeli flag. They won’t even come have a historical debate with me. #AmYisraelChai #ProudJew #Vanderbilt
skill issue for those men. the correct answer is it’s impossible to have a favorite bird. if I said barred owl, I would feel shame the next time I saw a Canada warbler, or a Say’s phoebe, or an American kestrel. I’m already feeling stress about naming some birds and not others!
Are there any men out there who have a favorite bird that is not an eagle? Every single man I have ever asked said "eagle".
as a general rule I don't think anyone who spent 100k on plastic surgery to look like the k-pop star he was stalking but ended up just looking like a burn victim gets to make fun of other ppl for being weird. you handed that card over at the doctors office dude
New LGBTQI+ identity just dropped…Trans Aliens. 👽🛸🏳️⚧️
@Very__Regular fyi here's what comes next lol
Been up there twice now. I've seen countless instances where some right winger is openly goading a student (sometimes with faux kindness like this or sometimes with stuff that'd make your skin crawl) and I haven't seen anybody break. There's a real unity in their vision here.
Cannot say enough how impressive the UCLA encampment's ability to tune out dorks has been. People twice their age are folding in minutes but they've been remarkably organized in how to approach people like this.
Karen starts crying because students refuse to talk to her 🤣
terrible news for ivy league grads who were hoping to move to lakewood washington to help a single 70 year old man run a geocities website
Attention job seekers. I will not hire any recent graduate of Columbia, because that school is so tainted that I will not be able to trust in the character nor the educational attainment of any of its students. And I furthermore will not hire any older graduates either, because…
Pop music has a limited number of tricks it performs to make you love it, some of them are timeless but most only work the first couple times you see them
seeing how much the quality of pop music has declined since the 2000s-2010s is honestly crazy
It’s always about the same! Young people love it, adults tolerate it, older folks find it actively annoying. This is because by the hundredth time you hear one, a song how going out dancing is fun just simply doesn’t surprise you
@isaiah_bb it's so silly to call this unfair when the Pro-Israel side has characterized the protesters as pro-Hamas.