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Tweets403
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Following546
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Likes850
You are not the darkness you see inside yourself. You are bright and kind and that is truth. The world needs your light.
When life hands me lemons, I'm like, "Dude, are you even reading the list? We need fabric softener, toothpaste, and toilet paper!"
I once dated a guy who opposed me volunteering on social causes because "what if someone who doesn't need it gets help" and I'll be damned if that isn't the prevailing mindset of this country
This morning my son told us he was finally going to dress himself. 20 minutes later he came downstairs with his pants on inside out, one sock, and his shirt on backwards. It was actually adorable. He is 27 years old please help us he won't leave
Me: Babe, out of my purse can you bring me my… *Husband brings entire purse*
This is not freedom. Freedom is not being too afraid to go to the mall. To go to school. To go to college. To go to a concert. To go to a parade. This is a life lived under the mantle of tyranny. The tyranny of guns. They would have us all hiding at home, and call it freedom.
You can’t go to work, to the MALL, to the grocery store, to your church, to the movies or the bank. You can’t attend a concert, go to a dance class or go to see your doctor. You can’t ring a doorbell, use a leaf blower, hop in a car, pull down a driveway, bounce a ball, or ask…
i am once again begging you to stop trying to get out of jury duty
Do you remember when you joined Twitter? I do! #MyTwitterAnniversary
Now can we take climate change seriously? Please?
if you eat the whole pizza, no one will know there was ever even a pizza
My suspicion is that Matthew McConaughey is actually speaking for a lot more gun owners - certainly responsible gun owners - than the NRA.
Wow, this McConaughey speech
Dear Media friends: STOP calling them “protestors” ... they are domestic terrorists!
BREAKING: “TRUMP WILL NOT BE SILENCED!”, trump posts on a WH staffer’s Pinterest account
The fly has been looking forward to the inauguration for months and where the fly goes, so goeth the head of the VP upon which the fly has made its home.
Agnes Mirabell @AMirabell88734
57 Followers 916 Following
🅛🅞🅛🅐 @SmathyDeez4420
602 Followers 751 Following @smathydeez has been hacked unfollow! just a 4'11 milf 🇨🇦 6x Tarantula lover🕷️🕸️ HoUzE HoAr FETISH ONLY!! I LOVE TO PEG
Tosha Villalovos @villalov_to
58 Followers 5K Following
Yaeko Wrzesien @WrzesiYa
69 Followers 5K Following
Saleem Bassadien @saleemb8
532 Followers 2K Following Innovator, Philosopher, Poet, Lyricist, Writer, Geek. :)
ThisOneSays @ThisOneSayz
19K Followers 5K Following Winging this life. Check back for no helpful tips whatsoever. https://t.co/8mX27QK6yN
Teresa Brooks @MichelleMc13202
45 Followers 529 Following I’m kinda lovely and fun to be with,I love all facts of life,arts and history❤️🔥❤️🔥
Hanna razk @HannaRazk
14 Followers 201 Following
savior @savior55320928
141 Followers 446 Following #ThePromisedSavior https://t.co/vkUOrspPmn https://t.co/aKUavarUFl
Maintenance Whore @woodstock_guy
415 Followers 1K Following
Anotsosubtle @slipofmytongue
1K Followers 1K Following Watch your step. I place my words where I want to.
Matthew VanDyke @Matt_VanDyke
538K Followers 442K Following Founder, Sons of Liberty International, #veterans training Ukrainian forces to fight Russia. A 501c3 nonprofit org: https://t.co/iJVW8PgiN9
The Dirty Penguin Pre.. @DirtyPresents
59 Followers 299 Following The Dirty Penguin is a spit in your eye, fight to the death, play dirty and win spirit... embodied by the Dirty Penguin Army.
Olive Elizabeth ⚔�.. @OneWonderWoman
13K Followers 6K Following 💪🏼 NPC Amateur Figure Competitor 🏠 House Flipper 🎨 Artist ✏️ Designer 💕 Mom 🐾 Dog Lover 🪴 Crazy Plant Lady 📷 IG: 13BlackOlives
NatPark Reservations @natparkres
193 Followers 188 Following National Park Reservations provides lodging and activity reservations both inside as well as in the gateway communities of the United States National Parks.
Lucille Brown @brown_addrianis
30 Followers 207 Following
Dave At Work @daveatwork101
57 Followers 301 Following I'm an accountant. I hate my job. My best friend is Richard. Follow me and make my parents proud.
Robert Schultze @diawaguy48
87 Followers 187 Following
People Gotta Live @peoplegottalive
3K Followers 4K Following I slept with Castro's main whore. He gave me 8 hours to leave the country.
Lady Lawya @Parkerlawyer
66K Followers 9K Following divorce lawyer | mom to a bazillion kids | https://t.co/0FDtG6xK4t | please send all dms to @funderlaw | https://t.co/t7dCbYmwgu
Shelly NitNots @MsNitnots
6K Followers 3K Following I'm on a mission, but it's impossible. https://t.co/4Imw8mFASm
Chris Swart @BwanaChris
63K Followers 56K Following A wealth of experience in data analysis, GPS tracking, risk assessment, fraud detection, I bring a unique perspective to Twitter in account forensic diagnosis.
Stags Woodward ('Chew.. @MagsWoodward
2K Followers 2K Following standup comic; increasingly out of step with everyday folks.
Custom Kix Designs @charmer1881
245K Followers 268K Following London Fashion Week Designer 2023 creating Custom Art on footwear, accessories & clothing ✨️ email: [email protected]
James Gordon-Foxwell @JGFMercedes
238K Followers 227K Following Owner of #CarLubeTV #youtube car products and cars reviewed on my channel. If you have anything for me DM me. YouTube: link below... 📷 Instagram CarLubeTV
Hughesy ♛ @hughesnj
8K Followers 12K Following Englishman living on the bonny west coast of Scotland; Father of two who is lucky enough to aviate for a living... Cycling, Running and F1 Fan.
Elsarita @Elsarytta
901 Followers 1K Following
Drano Raul (parody) @DranoRaul
4K Followers 4K Following I travel the world in search of good things to tweet about. Mostly I tweet crap I think up. What a waste of money. I don't follow back spam accounts
Tech Diva Milanᅠᅠ.. @MilanLee
5K Followers 6K Following
DONTJIMMYMEJULZ @DONTJIMMYMEJULZ
23K Followers 23K Following Hi! If you're new to twitter please enjoy wasting countless hours of your life here. And don't worry, that empty feeling is perfectly normal.
Adduce Alethea @ImJimmyDee
70K Followers 71K Following F4F .. NO PORNO ...... God is Real, don't let anyone tell you differently
Mike Turpin @MiketurpinCMF
2K Followers 3K Following 1/6 of ColorMeFunny Comedy. Host of Color Me Bloody MMA Podcast. One-liners. Stories. Improv. Props.
Sandra Newman @sannewman
35K Followers 4K Following Author of various novels: JULIA, THE MEN, THE HEAVENS, THE COUNTRY OF ICE CREAM STAR, etc. Also co-author of HOW NOT TO WRITE A NOVEL. She/they
prancer the reindeer @_prancer
5K Followers 5K Following the one and only. spreading Christmas joy all year through. vacancy in stables for mucker outer. Moved to Bluesky
True Thoughts @THOSEGOODVlBES
169K Followers 118K Following Just Tweeting Things You Can Relate To. Follow @_Macklemore
Ali Felessor Dinary @felessor
363 Followers 429 Following All the things my mother never taught me, and a few things she did.
ruziqyzutoca @ruziqyzutoca
186 Followers 1K Following Remember when it was the last day of school & our teachers told us, Have a safe summer and make smart decisions. ? I laugh everytime
Martin The Agent @MartinTheAgent
2K Followers 3K Following
Dan Eastwood @MercyBooCoo
218 Followers 961 Following Lover, TIE fighter, hoarse whisperer. Comedian.
Caitlin Clark @CaitlinClark22
344K Followers 599 Following Indiana Fever | Iowa Women’s Basketball Alum | 3x USA Basketball Gold Medalist | Business Inquiries: [email protected]
Wings Unfurled @nights_descent
857 Followers 440 Following Sinking into sunsets. Getting lost within the dreams. Read, retweet & like, but the words belong to me. Any feelings that bloom inside, those are yours to keep.
Judd Apatow 🇺🇦 @JuddApatow
2.3M Followers 2K Following
ICE T @FINALLEVEL
1.9M Followers 2K Following ‘FOR MATURE AUDIENCES’ ICE T Leader of BODYCOUNT & The FINAL LEVEL TWITTER GANG.#FLTG Author,MC & Actor @ICET on Instagram Oh yeah..I got a couple a GRAMMYS 💎
BrooklynDad_Defiant!�.. @mmpadellan
1.3M Followers 42K Following Proud papa. Perpetually pissed. #BlueWave2024, #Feminist. Author of The Liddle'est President. 👉Sr. Advisor, @ReallyAmerican1👈👀
Arielle Dundas @ArielleDundas
14K Followers 4K Following My niche is that I’m funny and I have interesting opinions. She/her. Stardew valley streamer. ADHD. typos are part of my brand.
Chris Megerian @ChrisMegerian
52K Followers 2K Following @AP White House reporter. Previously @latimes in Washington and Sacramento, @starledger in Trenton. Reach me at [email protected]
Dan Rather @DanRather
2.6M Followers 1K Following Journalist, storyteller, lifelong reader. Texan by birth and by choice. Author of STEADY: https://t.co/8kW1QUbZQJ
The Lincoln Project @ProjectLincoln
2.9M Followers 1K Following "You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today.” – Abraham Lincoln 🏴☠️ | Home of #TheBreakdown
Pete Buttigieg @PeteButtigieg
3.7M Followers 3K Following Personal account. For official updates, follow @SecretaryPete. Husband, father, veteran, writer, South Bend’s former Mayor Pete. (he/him)
Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris
19.8M Followers 720 Following Fighting for the people. Wife, Momala, Auntie. She/her. Official account is @VP.
Joe Biden @JoeBiden
38.0M Followers 46 Following Husband to @DrBiden, proud father and grandfather. Ready to finish the job for all Americans. Official account is @POTUS.
Jack Boot @IamJackBoot
13K Followers 1K Following The New Yorker, Vanity Fair, The Atlantic, Harper's, Rolling Stone. I've read some of these magazines.
Matthew VanDyke @Matt_VanDyke
538K Followers 442K Following Founder, Sons of Liberty International, #veterans training Ukrainian forces to fight Russia. A 501c3 nonprofit org: https://t.co/iJVW8PgiN9
Olive Elizabeth ⚔�.. @OneWonderWoman
13K Followers 6K Following 💪🏼 NPC Amateur Figure Competitor 🏠 House Flipper 🎨 Artist ✏️ Designer 💕 Mom 🐾 Dog Lover 🪴 Crazy Plant Lady 📷 IG: 13BlackOlives
why? @knot_eye
10K Followers 5K Following Sorry ladies, I'm not taken. My tweets are dumb because I am a dork. https://t.co/ijB7owVcUz
Grant Tanaka: Honky @GrantTanaka
37K Followers 5K Following Anatomically correct. For the most part.
RVG @RVGisFUNNY
11K Followers 6K Following / I Have Kids / Bob Dylan Brought Me To Jesus / I Own EVERY Police Academy Movie / 80's Horror 4 Life / Mental Health Stuff / Physical Media /
People Gotta Live @peoplegottalive
3K Followers 4K Following I slept with Castro's main whore. He gave me 8 hours to leave the country.
Lady Lawya @Parkerlawyer
66K Followers 9K Following divorce lawyer | mom to a bazillion kids | https://t.co/0FDtG6xK4t | please send all dms to @funderlaw | https://t.co/t7dCbYmwgu
𝙎𝙞𝙧 𝘽𝙪.. @KhumzAomi
11K Followers 8K Following •Constitutionally forced Indian•Ex-headhunter🃏Juggling freedom,flag & boundaries•Chronic dilly-dallier•Episodic conversationalist📌RTs on WKND*shamepain🍾any1?
Shelly NitNots @MsNitnots
6K Followers 3K Following I'm on a mission, but it's impossible. https://t.co/4Imw8mFASm
Ashley Kaye @hifromashley
16K Followers 724 Following 🛻 traveling the world with my dog 🌶️ ‘23 Tacoma / MT / Macho Taco ⚡️ 🌊 go places | make memories | capture moments 🌸 [email protected]
Dr. ~Pink Freud~ @RealGulfWarVet1
16K Followers 13K Following Female US Gulf War Veteran... Twitter is not real life! Left Biden’s U.S. in my rearview mirror. 🇲🇽 Living my BEST life in Puerto Vallarta
stanley behrman @stanleybehrman
36K Followers 14K Following I mostly lean left, which usually makes me right! https://t.co/hZl3W1ZADU
Crystal Penguin @PenguinCrystal
7K Followers 4K Following Twitter enthusiast. I’m healing and evolving and I deserve happiness and health and a life free of abuse. #antifa #blm #hedonist
Chris Swart @BwanaChris
63K Followers 56K Following A wealth of experience in data analysis, GPS tracking, risk assessment, fraud detection, I bring a unique perspective to Twitter in account forensic diagnosis.
karan v @Thateverydayguy
8K Followers 6K Following a performative personna of me with some virtue signalling.
andy lassner @andylassner
442K Followers 2K Following Executive Producer - @JHudShow Previously @ellendegeneres show
☮️electric🕉fee.. @einsteinsexual
8K Followers 301 Following Married mom of four. I don’t have time for this. Tweets https://t.co/oSEmAA5RR2
Sofiya Alexandra @TheSofiya
25K Followers 2K Following Comedian, writer, podcaster @privatepartsun & @420dayfiance from Odesa. My standup album was #1 on iTunes. RESOURCES 🇺🇦https://t.co/RAb88z7izP🇺🇦
Marl @Marlebean
40K Followers 7K Following If you innocently act like you don't know, people will explain dirty words to you and it's hilarious.
southpaw ☘ @_SetTheHook_
12K Followers 645 Following Recent: https://t.co/FEJntKzAz2 Judger of books by their cover.
The Wry Philosopher @WryHumor
69K Followers 67K Following Reflections on the funny side of life. Irreverent humor, sarcasm, irony, comedy & jokes. For daily grins, put me on your favorite list, and keep coming back!
Emily @twerkmasta500
316 Followers 993 Following occasional mathematician, full-time idiot. I laugh at myself so you don't have to.
Dad and Buried @DadandBuried
47K Followers 3K Following I don't hate my kids, I hate parenting them! PRE-ORDER MY BOOK! https://t.co/6fqLgZx00R
Stags Woodward ('Chew.. @MagsWoodward
2K Followers 2K Following standup comic; increasingly out of step with everyday folks.
Leroy Penguin @Leroy_penguin
10K Followers 17 Following Hip Hop rappin, eye brow raising, tequila smashing afro penguin. Just call me Leroy, 18
@KingJames Look at it again dawg
@inflectionent @Shari_Nycole @SheKnowsSports @CWilliamson44 @the3on3Pod Let’s see if Molly Davis can suit up this weekend. She is the alternate PG that Iowa otherwise lacks. Even playing 10 minutes a game would help Iowa tremendously with pressure defenses.
Such a special night inside Carver surrounded by everyone who has supported me on this journey. I am so lucky to have the best family, teammates, coaches, and fans🫶🏻 Thank you to everyone who has reached out - your kind words mean the world to me🖤 Go Hawks!
It’s the guns AND the culture.
🚨Similar to the AR-15, this semi-automatic weapon accepts high-capacity magazines. Between 1922-1982 it was as easy to buy as a sandwich. Yet, in that time mass shootings basically never happened. It's the culture, not the guns. Lewiston Maine #MassShooting Robert Card
I once dated a guy who opposed me volunteering on social causes because "what if someone who doesn't need it gets help" and I'll be damned if that isn't the prevailing mindset of this country
This morning my son told us he was finally going to dress himself. 20 minutes later he came downstairs with his pants on inside out, one sock, and his shirt on backwards. It was actually adorable. He is 27 years old please help us he won't leave
Me: Babe, out of my purse can you bring me my… *Husband brings entire purse*
As a parent I’m not worried that my 9 and 13 year olds are going to be “indoctrinated” with “wokeness” at school. I’m not worried that they’re going to ‘feel guilty about their whiteness’ because they’re learning accurate history. I’m not worried that they’re going to be…
You can’t go to work, to the MALL, to the grocery store, to your church, to the movies or the bank. You can’t attend a concert, go to a dance class or go to see your doctor. You can’t ring a doorbell, use a leaf blower, hop in a car, pull down a driveway, bounce a ball, or ask…
i am once again begging you to stop trying to get out of jury duty
@alex_d_burns @ImaniOakleyNJ10 Ok do you recognize the jury needs more people skeptical of the system? Can’t help the defendant from home
is it spring if i'm still wearing three sweaters?
Obama wasn't in the Oval Office on 9/11. Slacker. @jordanklepper
Good morning! Gas prices are going down.
@donwinslow 107 days til midterms VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE
For 187 minutes Trump watched gleefully as an armed mob,that he sent, stormed the Capitol. And the only reason he half heartedly told then to stop was the threat of his Cabinet invoking the 25th Amendment. Tonight another nail will be driven into his Seditious Coffin.
Now can we take climate change seriously? Please?
I tested positive for Covid and while it isn’t near as bad as my original case it is no picnic in the park. I guess that’s what I get for pretending like the pandemic was over and getting on a boat with 1,000 strangers sipping pina coladas without a care in the world.
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