not your lawyer @schizesq
trial attorney | first time mom | bourbon drinker | nothing here is endorsed by my employer Annapolis, MD Joined September 2011-
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Far from perfect but I did it and they’re over & now I get to replay all the questions I ~should have asked but didn’t~ on loop until the conclusion of this case!!
Far from perfect but I did it and they’re over & now I get to replay all the questions I ~should have asked but didn’t~ on loop until the conclusion of this case!!
I’m taking some really high stakes depositions today solo… would really appreciate some good vibes from the law twitterverse 🫶🏼🫶🏼
we’re back in ways that have been unprecedented by all mankind before
📢📢📢 Having to pay for parking at a courthouse is an access to justice issue 📢📢📢
🎶 “I cry a lot but I am so productive” 🎶 like a 30 year old litigator in 6 figures of debt chasing a bonus goal 🤪🤠
I honest to god don’t think I’m listening to the same album as all of the critics
I never disliked it from the beginning, but wow I like TTPD the more and more I listen to it, I truly can’t get enough
you know how to ball i know aristotle
I just hope this category of girlies is also in therapy
I just hope this category of girlies is also in therapy
this may be an unpopular opinion that makes some people mad but i don’t think you walk away from TTPD feeling “scolded” as a fan if you’ve kept a healthy perspective on what being a fan of taylor means over the last year on your own
“It’s a Joe Alwyn album” “it’s a Matty Healy album” actually it’s a Taylor Swift album, don’t piss me off.
what if i say she's not that greedy because those aren't pop songs like 😭 this album is definitely not for everyone and it really feels like she made it for her and swifties
This album really hits different when you don't have to hear a chronically online bitch nitpicking every little thing about taylor swift open.spotify.com/album/5H7ixXZf…
'my friends all smell like weed or little babies' is the best one-line description of being in your early 30s i've personally ever heard
Clara Bow is very much about what the industry does to women, right?
Liz Gil @LizCGil
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Ok so I guess you just call this franchise law
I love working with food based small/medium businesses because there is a good chance I’ll get a cookie or sandwich just before delivering frightening legal advice
hear me out what if newspapers had an online ~day pass~ option that cost the same as buying the print edition that day. instead of just subscribe or not
When breweries were getting big in the states during early 2010s they almost always had board games and stuff for kids, because they were meant to be something of a community center, but then a bunch of adults thought the jenga was just for them.
STOP BRINGING YOUR KIDS TO BREWERIES IM TRYING TO RELAX
I heard a Big Law attorney once asked a solo shop attorney to draft a motion for extension of time and the solo fainted almost immediately
the only thing a small shop lawyer should be able to do is shine the shoes of their Big Law colleagues and make sure the coffee stays hot before it reaches their desk
I’ll never stop bringing my kids to breweries, they’re huge, usually outdoors and sometimes have tractors and I can drink a beer outside. The more childless adults who complain about this online, the more wild I will let my kids be. Bringing stomp rockets next time.
STOP BRINGING YOUR KIDS TO BREWERIES IM TRYING TO RELAX
Started Anyone But You, and not Sydney Sweeney character being in law school and saying “idek if I want to be a lawyer” I FEEL ATTACKED
I really did not think that it would be controversial to insult 98% of my colleagues in the country, he blubbered as he peeked out from his own ass, looking down on the non-SCOTUS- admitted masses from his palatial office built from the bones of SeaWorld whale trainers
@yourpalCJ @rfelicello I really didn't think it would be that controversial. The brief in opposition is a specialized document and whose tone and conventions used by those who file frequently in SCOTUS, big or small, aren't usually common to others. I could be wrong in this case, of course.
most disputes can be resolved with an offering of crab rangoon
@smmarotta @rfelicello If Hogan Lovells is churning out Supreme Court briefs on par with a two-person consumer fraud firm, it makes you wonder why clients are paying the Hogan Lovells rate.
You’ve outdone yourselves, this is unbelievable 🙏🙏🙏
.@taylorswift13 becomes the first artist in history to occupy the entire top 14 spots of the #Hot100 simultaneously: No. 1, “Fortnight” ft. @PostMalone No. 2, “Down Bad” No. 3, “I Can Do It With a Broken Heart” No. 4, “The Tortured Poets Department” No. 5, “So Long, London” No.…
@schizesq For every deposition and witness examination, there are three: the one you prepare for, the one you do, and the one you wished you'd done. There are no exceptions. So you just do the best you can with what you've got in the moment. Great job!
@shivermevembers My 19 month old clears the table! Without asking! Of course, by that I mean he throws everything away and we didn’t catch on to that until he’d improperly disposed of 50% of the toddler cutlery. But he means well!
My civ pro teacher, a former RBG clerk, once told me that the most obvious sign of an incompetent lawyer is underestimating a lawyer’s abilities based on where they are located, work, or size of their firm. You never know why or how someone ended up in the situation you find them
There are arguments on both sides for ghost-written briefs in opposition, but, like, does anyone think the Justices are fooled into thinking that a New York consumer fraud attorney in a two-person law firm wrote this?
I think 2 people can write a 32 page document yes
There are arguments on both sides for ghost-written briefs in opposition, but, like, does anyone think the Justices are fooled into thinking that a New York consumer fraud attorney in a two-person law firm wrote this?
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