BonaFideIntent @BonaFideIntent
Sometimes, I pretend I'm an Olympic swimmer & swim in a tub of Goldfish crackers wearing arm floaties. Sometimes, I'm not on drugs. travelchronicles4theshitter.com Tampa, FL Joined March 2012-
Tweets23K
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Followers7K
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Following3K
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Likes68K
Help a girl out & cast a FREE VOTE every 24hrs?! 💙😘 cover.inkedmag.com/2024/christina… #inked #tattoo #inkedgirls
I found a bottle of vodka under my bed, skittles under my pillow, & boxes of noodles in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
12 Vicodin MAY be my limit. I've been in bed for 3 hours, polishing a tomato with a dryer sheet I found hidden in the leg of my sweatpants.
Watched Top Chef. Got motivated. Made dinosaur chicken nuggets in the microwave. Eating them in the order they died in the food chain.
If you think I'm tweeting this in the nude, you're wrong. I'm wearing a sombrero & a candy necklace.
Home alone. Drunk. In a penguin costume. Wish you were here.
Life is better after having sex. Or when you know you're about to have sex. Or when you know someone wants to have sex w you. Probably.
Bitch, this is an elevator ride not a tea party. Stand in your corner & stop talking to me.
Keep your friends close & your enemies, in your trunk. Unless you're crossing a border. Then don't do that.
Time is precious. That which is dearest to you can be ripped away unexpectedly. Savor every moment! RIP My Box of Stolen Animal Crackers
It's a tweet people, not your diary. Let's stay focused here. Unrelated: I am eating a sandwich. It has cheese on it.
Mowing the lawn. Idk who's lawn I'm mowing. Or how I escaped Home Depot on a stolen mower. I've collected 27 garden gnomes & a plastic duck.
I've drank about $256.43 in liquor. I'm making grilled cheese. Without cheese. Or bread. I'm frying butter in a pan. This is a cry for help.
If I had a dollar for every time someone said they wanted to have sex with me, I'd have $0.13
My Aunt: The BEST murder weapon is an icicle. No evidence or DNA. Trust me on this. Me: WHAT DO YOU WANT YOUR TWITTER HANDLE TO BE?!?
I was mid-masturbation & thought of a good tweet. I stopped masturbating to tweet it. This is the tweet.
I took a brief intermission.. Was the emotional trauma of losing a gummy bear in your vagina while masturbating drunk discussed yet? ..No?
Some guy rides on a boat & gets a DAY named after him. I rode on a boat & all I got was drunk, nauseous, & public nudity charges. The fuck..
I dreamt last night I went to the gym for an hour. Can I eat my doughnut now?
I was gonna go to the gym, but I was stopped by a bag of Cheetos.
Ivsy @Ivsy01
40K Followers 9K Following drinking slurpees in front of 7-eleven with @The_Getawaygirl My thoughts in a box. my tweets 🤦♀️ https://t.co/0g8VMFzt2k
A Jen, Duh @hipchkk
15K Followers 851 Following “‘T ain't no sin to take off your skin, and dance around in your bones”
Angie Davis ❤️’.. @AngieDavisHaha
17K Followers 4K Following I'll always be the jester,in a world that idolizes the princess.Goodnight @davidduchovny girl. Comic of Twitter tour @TweetComedians ,knows how to make a salad.
C’est La Vie @Robert_Beau
57K Followers 50K Following Real Deal ~ Part Time Penis Model ~ Full Time Asshole
Just Call Me Frank™.. @JustCallMeFrank
15K Followers 6K Following Nightmare with legs | Creator, writer, sayer of things and stuff. Mostly things | My YouTube channel: https://t.co/XlCXxMHyH0
Juddy @iAmJuddy
22K Followers 8K Following Cynical, sarcastic asshole, and I'm fine with it, so piss off. I do not like you and I never will. Deal with it. Fuck you.
Sheila @Sheila_Mac420
15K Followers 7K Following Token lesbian. I like to smoke weed, and lick vagina. I write things and stuff that makes you feel the feels.
Lisabug @Lisabug74
20K Followers 9K Following Welcome to Lisa World! | Love food | Enjoy puns | Cake addict | Cat Mom |DMs are closed, but replies are welcomed.
FRONT TOWARD ENEMY @armyVet1972
5K Followers 3K Following #deadcorps MOSTLY DEAD_ former Dallas cowboy cheerleader bodyguard_currently just an old dude
Red Velvet Sin @DontTouchMyWine
12K Followers 629 Following Recently expelled from anger management class, and enjoys punching people in the throat. I want to be the reason they never find your body.
Alfie @DownFrontArtist
54K Followers 48K Following There is no show without business. https://t.co/X2EN341vnk
Simge Dikmen @smgdikmen
394 Followers 334 Following
KurtyTheBurtyWurty�.. @KURTYTHEWURTY
370 Followers 1K Following Cause I'm God mother fucker & it's judgement day 😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈
R.J. Union @RayLUnion
476 Followers 5K Following Pretty much nothing else, if you wanna know just ask?
Dan Ornelas @danoduck
480 Followers 652 Following It's not that I'm lazy, it's just that I don't care.
DogLovingBlueWaveRide.. @rlc54
4K Followers 5K Following #Resist#Science#Biden/Harris#LBGTQ #LegalizeTexas ,dog lover , retired science educator.
Culhulain @FreeRideMC_FOG
2K Followers 5K Following Hard Line Constitutionalist, Motorcycle rider, US Army Retired, writer, Artist, life explorer, and hobby farmer. SW Oregon coast B.A.C.A supporter, single man
drake @Godzilla68
366 Followers 352 Following Just a guy who enjoys great pics and great people ...lets experience life together
CJ Perry @CJPerry00086772
1K Followers 5K Following LFC for life, Rangers till I die FAB ☘️🇬🇧 18 years Royal Irish Regiment, Soldier, Father, Grandad, FAUGH A BALLAGH.GSTQ.
Vixen & Doll @VixenAndDoll
2K Followers 5K Following
dyoviene @daveyoviene
434 Followers 1K Following What doesn’t kill you, will probably get you on the 2nd try.
hiToast @hitoast
2K Followers 3K Following started out as a rock band account - tweetings by aiden the bass player #music #rock #toast
ELBORACHO7 @ELBORACHO71
194 Followers 418 Following
Sarah Myers Bennett @Bennett_Bunch
790 Followers 2K Following The 1 person Taye Diggs refuses to follow. Justifiably blocked by Sami Zayn. Southern Liberal. RN. Hardcore UGA fan. I'm a good mom and a baaaaaad motha
chris mayberry @chrisma44835863
1K Followers 4K Following
Suzanne Schmidt @suzannejschmidt
821 Followers 651 Following #Hiking through life #HeartForward, embracing every opportunity to #Storytell, #BellyLaugh, or join a #DanceParty. 💃🏼 Creator of #comedy series @heyyouitsmela
dedbrain @mmmdonutss
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EL BORACHO @ELBORACHO6
122 Followers 461 Following
HERstory on the rocks @HerstoryR
3K Followers 5K Following HERstory on the Rocks is a podcast with Katie & Allie. Each week we recount the story of two famous women from history whilst drinking themed cocktails 🍸
Myles 🇨🇦 @myles_morrison
6K Followers 6K Following Tweeting without the express written consent of Major League Baseball. New comedy album out now | https://t.co/qfo0h2pgEm
vjeverice2 @vjeverice2
1 Followers 328 Following
mohammad uzair @mohammaduzair1
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èdffggg @dffggg79972759
18 Followers 84 Following
Michael Lartey @Michael27234856
44 Followers 981 Following
Tyler @Tyler03126209
566 Followers 4K Following I have a huge turn on to be degraded and humiliated for being poorly endowed down below. Only follow if you are interested in helping me out ladies.
James Coleman @JamesCo17896439
81 Followers 158 Following
William david @William30800321
57 Followers 775 Following
DANNI @collinsmathin
147 Followers 904 Following Dankwoods, Dankvapes, Exoticcarts, Mariocarts, Cali carts.... More. 👇SHOP HERE👇
kerry @kerry03057642
441 Followers 822 Following Single and lovin it.... beards are life..... craftbeer and whiskey kinda girl 🍷🍸🍻
Ivsy @Ivsy01
40K Followers 9K Following drinking slurpees in front of 7-eleven with @The_Getawaygirl My thoughts in a box. my tweets 🤦♀️ https://t.co/0g8VMFzt2k
A Jen, Duh @hipchkk
15K Followers 851 Following “‘T ain't no sin to take off your skin, and dance around in your bones”
Angie Davis ❤️’.. @AngieDavisHaha
17K Followers 4K Following I'll always be the jester,in a world that idolizes the princess.Goodnight @davidduchovny girl. Comic of Twitter tour @TweetComedians ,knows how to make a salad.
C’est La Vie @Robert_Beau
57K Followers 50K Following Real Deal ~ Part Time Penis Model ~ Full Time Asshole
Just Call Me Frank™.. @JustCallMeFrank
15K Followers 6K Following Nightmare with legs | Creator, writer, sayer of things and stuff. Mostly things | My YouTube channel: https://t.co/XlCXxMHyH0
Juddy @iAmJuddy
22K Followers 8K Following Cynical, sarcastic asshole, and I'm fine with it, so piss off. I do not like you and I never will. Deal with it. Fuck you.
Sheila @Sheila_Mac420
15K Followers 7K Following Token lesbian. I like to smoke weed, and lick vagina. I write things and stuff that makes you feel the feels.
Lisabug @Lisabug74
20K Followers 9K Following Welcome to Lisa World! | Love food | Enjoy puns | Cake addict | Cat Mom |DMs are closed, but replies are welcomed.
FRONT TOWARD ENEMY @armyVet1972
5K Followers 3K Following #deadcorps MOSTLY DEAD_ former Dallas cowboy cheerleader bodyguard_currently just an old dude
Red Velvet Sin @DontTouchMyWine
12K Followers 629 Following Recently expelled from anger management class, and enjoys punching people in the throat. I want to be the reason they never find your body.
Myles 🇨🇦 @myles_morrison
6K Followers 6K Following Tweeting without the express written consent of Major League Baseball. New comedy album out now | https://t.co/qfo0h2pgEm
The Voice @NBCTheVoice
4.8M Followers 9K Following 🎶 This is #TheVoice! 🎶 Mondays on @NBC and streaming on @Peacock.
SaraBeth @SBSwags
148K Followers 153K Following Music Maker. Baylor Bear. Coffee Lover. Dog Mom. #CMchattys Must Follow Female Artist. John 1:16. Insta & TikTok - @SaraBethTX
Kelly Clarkson 🍷�.. @kellyclarkson
11.7M Followers 138 Following I sing & write sometimes. I say things others think I shouldn’t say sometimes. I host the @KellyClarksonTV all the time.
1iota @1iota
206K Followers 8K Following Follow for free tickets to TV shows, premieres, concerts, and special events! 🎟️
Sherry @SunnySicilian
481 Followers 477 Following
Katlin Green @katlingreen
78 Followers 240 Following
Felicia & Mary @hashtagTheGirls
97 Followers 430 Following Lesbian party planners South Florida ☀️Married-VEGAN-Dancer-Animal Rights Activists ✌❤️ Follow us on Instagram @hashtagthegirls
High Voltage @Explosivephuck
1K Followers 1K Following Born van down by river during General Malaise era. Currently in Witness Protection. Wasnt suppose to tell anyone. Send lawyers drugs and money. Moody bastard.
Arqum S. Goraya @_w0Ify__
22K Followers 19K Following
PleaseSedateMe @PleaseSedateMe
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☯Paulman :) @pole009
3K Followers 3K Following I'm just weird. 18+ XXX http://t.co/6jGOGito9t & https://t.co/adN09yGrge
ReeseButCallMeV @ReeseButCallMeV
9K Followers 501 Following I sleep in my clothes because I'm always too high to take them off =/
gregb @BadaBinge
5K Followers 4K Following
Calm Like a Bomb @stilettophile
3K Followers 1K Following it’s too late when you’re dead. eat the cake. 🧁☢️♊️ nsfw @_SvetlanaSnow
Spartan Photography @spartanphotoAVL
609 Followers 2K Following Photographer, Retired Army Officer, Part 107 Certified Pilot Providing aerial & commercial photography to the Upstate and WNC #aerialphotography #drone #DJI
TheReal Me @BornHustlerLLC
60 Followers 287 Following have a seat and allow me to introduce myself. Self respected mother of 2, wifey to an unstable S.O.B., & a damn good friend.
Kat 🇨🇦🇬🇷 @kathybotteas
40K Followers 12K Following Living your biggest fantasies. Welcome to my Twitter world. https://t.co/ICwb24scvv
Brittany @Brittangosss
86 Followers 248 Following
morecodesthanMI5 @morethanMI5
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Color Me Plaidd @ColorMePlaidd
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Talking Monkey @psinerd
758 Followers 1K Following The world's leading exporter of awful puns since 1809. (I do not tweet much these days.)
GH @shakes1554
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Pal @pallavigothnkr
1K Followers 902 Following The moment you give up is the moment you let somebody else win.
Jack Flash @Jamesry21
819 Followers 2K Following
NoctemSermone @NoctemSermone
452 Followers 615 Following
Bdc.hobaby.transition.. @NathanGrandadam
395 Followers 1K Following
.@KellyClarksonTV wins best Daytime Talk Show of 2022 LIVE at the #PCAs! 📺
It was a full circle moment for @ddlovato when @kellyclarkson covered one of their songs. #DemiOnFallon
Millennials everywhere will be talking about Kelly Clarkson in therapy after this.
KELLY. CLARKSON. That's it. That. Is. The. Tweet. #ACMAwards
I’m so proud of you @iamHaileyMia!! Thank you for being an amazing singer and all around good human!! #TeamKelly #VoiceFinale
Fun fact: This was our very first time performing this song live together! Y'all can watch the full performance of "Santa Can't You Hear Me" with @ArianaGrande from the #WhenChristmasComesAround @nbc special on @YouTube! 🎅 Atlantic.lnk.to/SantaCantYouHe…
Bringing y’all some sunshine in the wintertime 💛💛 #TeamKelly #TheVoice @gloglomakeup @cdicelove13 @RobertRamosProd
.@kellyclarkson's giving us all the holiday vibes with this #VoiceFinale performance. 🎁🎄 x.com/nbcthevoice/st…
Did you know that @kellyclarkson actually invented Christmas? 🎄❄️❤️ #VoiceFinale
Mission to keep it cool: ❌
What's that? You want more Kelly x @ArianaGrande? Okay 😉 #Kellyoke
A huge thank you to @kellyclarkson for having me guest host the @kellyclarksontv show. It was a lot of fun. If you get a chance, catch me hosting every weeknight on @youbetyourlife
Thank you @AppleMusic for adding “Santa, Can’t You Hear Me” with my girl @arianagrande to Christmas Pop Hits! music.apple.com/gb/playlist/ch…🎄❤️ #WhenChristmasComesAround
The Christmas Queens have arrived. 🎄🎄🎄 #WhenChristmasComesAround atlantic.lnk.to/WhenChristmasC…
How it Started vs. How it's Going ❤️ Y'all, I love this girl! Did I mention she's gonna be on my upcoming Christmas album!? 🎅 @ArianaGrande #WhenChristmasComesAround
My new song #ChristmasIsntCanceled is out now! 🎄 This song is part of my upcoming new album #WhenChristmasComesAround... available everywhere on October 15th. Pre-order it now. Atlantic.lnk.to/WhenChristmasC…
🚨🎄🚨🎄🚨
Alright, y'all! I can't keep this one a secret anymore!! I'm releasing a brand new album titled #WhenChristmasComesAround... and you can pre-order it starting tonight at 12AM ET!!! Until then, here's the track list.... 🎄🎶 #ChristmasIsntCanceled
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