Tepid Tess @lukewarmthinks
Random thoughts. 💭 Pet parent. 🐶🐱 Humor advocate. 💯 A$$h🚫le intolerant. x.com/search?q=from:… Northern North America 🇨🇦 Joined December 2021-
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Following162
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Adulting is mostly about being exhausted, telling other adults how exhausted you are and listening to other adults tell you how exhausted they are.
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My go bag is a wine bladder with an emergency straw handle.
Tepid Tess retweeted
I’m not fat, I just have good marbling
Tepid Tess retweeted
He died doing what he loved, trying to explain to her why the bank account is empty and how bitcoin works.
Christmas chocolate is the new Valentine's chocolate.
Tepid Tess retweeted
Break the ice by asking if they want to wrestle
Tepid Tess retweeted
I've become numb to the world Dentist: don't be so dramatic it's just a little Novocaine
Tepid Tess retweeted
It's still not too late to burn the bridges you've built this year
Tepid Tess retweeted
Tone is so hard to assess on Twitter. Right now I'm screaming like Samuel L. Jackson, and you didn't even realize it.
Tepid Tess retweeted
My Indian name would be "Stares at Phone all Day."
Tepid Tess retweeted
Because I'm trying to lose weight, I never eat lunch. I have a second breakfast around noon, but no lunch.
I'm just a girl, standing in front of a mirror, asking it to stop reflecting an old person.
When it's 40 below and you don't give af, you got a heater in your truck and you're off to the rodeo.
Tepid Tess retweeted
This what we've been waiting for all year, this is our day. - Tupperware
Tepid Tess retweeted
I’ve been planning to start my diet tomorrow since 2001.
She ate the meat, she got the figgy pudding. ~ Pink Floyd probably
Tepid Tess retweeted
The Muppets Take Manhattan is a Boxing Day movie
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