HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

An entertainment experience for parents, or anyone who's had parents, really. Also on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube: HowToBeADad https://t.co/0J79afktXQ howtobeadad.com Los Angeles, CA Joined July 2010

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

a month ago

The older I get, the more irritated I am by the spelling of Wednesday

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

4 months ago

I’ve said “well that didn’t sound good” many times in my life while driving. Now that I’m in my 40s, I also say it in reference to my body.

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

9 months ago

My dog: *panting in terror and shuddering like a lopsided laundry load on spin cycle* Me: Awww it’s okay, boy. It’s just a rapid series of explosions and guns going off hundreds of times for hours and hours. Don’t be such a scaredy cat.

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

9 months ago

Don't be a pessimist and tell me my fly is half open. Be an optimist and say it's half closed!

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McDad @mcdadstuff

a year ago

Well, it’s Father’s Day and the rest of my family is out of town. So, basically I’m living the dream of all mothers on Mother’s Day

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

a year ago

If you’re having a bad day, find a toddler and ask them to pronounce hallelujah. You’re welcome

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Dadman Walking @dadmann_walking

a year ago

What's great about older kids is that there's no longer food crumbs everywhere and they pick up after themselves and if you believed this I'm sorry. I'm totally lying. It's actually way worse. More crumbs. Hope this helps you younger parents out there.

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

2 years ago

I’m on a weight-loss journey. But I appear to be walking backwards.

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

2 years ago

Pausing a movie to explain old tech to your kid makes you really appreciate how far we’ve come, and how old you’ve gotten. Mostly the old part tho

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

2 years ago

Little kids putting on clothes is more entertaining than professional wrestling.

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

2 years ago

Some of you will need this soon.

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Simon Holland @simoncholland

2 years ago

Replaced a fuse in a rival dad’s Christmas lights so the second half of the strand would turn on right in front of his wife and kids.

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Josh RR Jokien @joshcarlosjosh

2 years ago

happy "let's circle back on this after the holidays" to all who observe!

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Dadman Walking @dadmann_walking

2 years ago

For a second time, my wife scheduled a double sleepover at our house when she conveniently has to work. Then as one of my son's friends is guzzling Kool aid at dinner, tells me he also has an iced caramel mocha earlier. One of us isn't surviving. It's me. I'm not gonna survive.

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HowToBeADad @HowToBeADad

2 years ago

You know what’s worse than getting a song you hate stuck in your head? Your kid getting a song you hate stuck in their head. Like 10 times worse man

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Dadman Walking @dadmann_walking

2 years ago

To all parents reading this, a reminder to take some time for yourself today and relax. Jk you've got toddlers. You're screwed. Hope this helps.

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Simon Holland @simoncholland

2 years ago

Heard a rival dad is planning to hand out king size candy bars for Halloween so now every trick or treater that comes to my house is getting a full rack of ribs.