Typo Negative @4eyes3nipples
I was built with a brain and some swagger Twitter.com/search?q=from%… Joined December 2019-
Tweets8K
-
Followers994
-
Following1K
-
Likes7K
HAMLET: To be or not to be, that is the question. ME: There have GOT to be more than that. I mean, my kid asked 93 questions in two minutes.
The older I get, the less it takes for me to be “snowed in.”
i’m not the best at remembering what chords and chord sequences are called but i remember what they sound like, so in my head they have names like “that aggressively show-choir sequence that’s supposed to sound triumphant” and “the chord the Jordan who writes songs always uses”
Going to take advantage of this good hair day and conquer everything I set out to do
I would switch to smooth peanut butter for you.
Haggis was the original hot pocket
After you cremate me, put my ashes into a peanut butter jar.
I’m “drive-thru donuts used to taste like cigarettes” years old.
I love my kids but some days I could go for Downton Abbey style parenting where the help just brought your kid to the drawing room to roll a wooden truck around for 10 minutes while you gazed on adoringly in your flapper dress, then whisked them away to the nursery.
You are enough.
Save some of that love for you today.
I’ll dance around the biggest mistakes and then dive head first.
Sex is like good liquor Neat
Can I interest you in any gang related violence.
It’s okay to take a step back in order to get the proper momentum to leap.
Do to very much foreseen circumstances I am taking a brief hiatus from this chaos. One day when I digitize your consciousness for you so that you don’t have to die you will thank me for not being a twat on Twitter those two weeks. Mata me bitches.
[at a bar] Me: Hey ladies, wanna hear some Shakespeare? Ladies: Sure! Me: Harketh thou for thine own ernst. Ladies: This is stupid. Me: Harketh! Ladies: You're stupid! Me: ERNST!!!
im not doing great lol dealing with crippling anxiety lmfao this is going to be an absolutely awful day rotflmao
Annie Hatfield @AnneHatfieldVO
48K Followers 6K Following Tall, pale, relentlessly cheerful. https://t.co/vhLLPJmuO2Helleanor Rigby @Mom_Overboard
56K Followers 3K Following 🥪 take these broken wings and learn to fly 🏔Kayla Chow Show @KaylaChowShow
47K Followers 15K Following 💙 Survived my mid-mid-life crisis. //SUPER MARRIED//BOY MOM//CATS//TACOS//SUNSCREEN//BEER//MURDERINO//LACTOSE INTOLERANT// 💙VENMO @ Kayla-Chow-ShowPresident Warren G. H.. @PopeAwesomeXIII
13K Followers 2K Following Commercially Inviable. ✌️ 29th US President (1921-1923) 🧐 Tip jar! https://t.co/Igf16XkzWv ❤ He/Him 👍 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🏴☠️ ❤️ See pinned for migration infoAdam @adamgreattweet
63K Followers 3K Following Resident physician as seen on Buzzfeed and TV, RTd by Barack Obama. He/HimSiren 💫 @CallSignSiren
108K Followers 5K Following Southern girl with eyes on the stars in the southern sky.💯ℂ𝕣𝕒𝕫�.. @Crazy_ButCute2
248K Followers 14K Following I lift things up and put them down. I love food. I look good naked. link in bio 💁🏼♀️ SLE/Fibro warrior! Every day stronger 💪🏻❤️💯Daveastated @Daveastated
7K Followers 1K Following Now I am become Dave, the destroyer of words. *Inventor of the flinglong* I only sleep to give my phone a breakDamnFineTweet @damnfinetweet
13K Followers 3K Following RIP DamnFineTweet 8/7/2019-4/27/2023 thank you for 85000 trophies and a million good vibes. I'll miss you!Lovely Potatoes @robin_991
21K Followers 8K Following As seen on KTLA. I ran the NY marathon. Drowning in bubbles. Napping on treadmillsFomo Simpson @HaliPhacks
8K Followers 3K Following Keeping it funny on Twitter since its early days as a radio show. My tweets ➡️ https://t.co/Z2tnWjzeDxCynicalTherapist @CynicalTherapi1
15K Followers 8K Following LMFT-LADAC Addictions Expert, Not your therapist, both traumatized and trauma informed. Sometimes a writer https://t.co/Y7o1NsmtJh Bad words ftw. 🏳️🌈Ghostface Kryllah @kryzazzy
25K Followers 5K Following 𝕌𝕟𝕒𝕡𝕠𝕝𝕠𝕘𝕖𝕥𝕚𝕔𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕪 𝔻𝕠𝕡𝕖 ℝ𝕒𝕔𝕔𝕠𝕠𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕦𝕣 𝕊𝕒𝕦𝕤𝕒𝕘𝕖 𝔼𝕘𝕘 𝕄𝕔𝕄𝕦𝕗𝕗𝕚𝕟 𝔼𝕟𝕥𝕙𝕦𝕤𝕚𝕒𝕤tJasmine Robillard @JasmiRobilla
36 Followers 5K FollowingLashon Bolin @BolinLasho
68 Followers 5K FollowingIsabelle Dell @IsabelleDe25116
96 Followers 5K FollowingElinor Orloski @OrlosElino
71 Followers 5K FollowingBuffy Scheaffer @BuffySchea51545
77 Followers 5K FollowingElina Maedche @ElinaMaedc86066
83 Followers 5K FollowingAlison Timmreck @ATimmre
49 Followers 5K FollowingAnum Mchattie @mchatti_an
32 Followers 5K FollowingLynetta Shahinian @lyne_shahini
50 Followers 5K FollowingBambi Loan @bamb_loa
68 Followers 5K FollowingKera Galles @kera_gal
89 Followers 5K FollowingAlma Kucharski @kuchars_al
49 Followers 5K FollowingIndie-rose Anetsberge.. @indie_ros
82 Followers 5K FollowingFlorencia Matros @florenc_matr
59 Followers 5K FollowingDestiny Murrah @mur_desti
82 Followers 5K FollowingOk Head @ok_head22684
74 Followers 5K FollowingCatherina Krul @KruCatheri
35 Followers 5K FollowingMahalia Akawanzie @MahalAkawanzi
79 Followers 5K FollowingMary Peroutka @PeroutkMar
57 Followers 5K FollowingJoya Aumend @JAumend74686
43 Followers 5K FollowingKenya Dereus @dereus_ke
65 Followers 5K FollowingMan Hinckson @HincksonMa27980
46 Followers 5K FollowingBeulah Batko @BatkoBeula27898
61 Followers 5K FollowingHedwig Nebel @hedw_neb
57 Followers 5K FollowingMatilde Rundall @RundMatil
35 Followers 5K FollowingCarmel Payton @PaytonCarm68659
52 Followers 5K FollowingIrina Hedtke @HedtkeIri
20 Followers 3K FollowingHawa Eisenmenger @HawEisenmeng
64 Followers 5K FollowingAfton Hemingway @heming_aft
34 Followers 5K FollowingYasmin Aytes @ayt_yasm
37 Followers 5K FollowingRaymond Avenia @AvenRaymon
56 Followers 5K FollowingRachell Newer @NewRache
28 Followers 5K FollowingKaroline Shilts @karoli_shil
40 Followers 5K FollowingMerissa Precht @MerissaPre58894
55 Followers 5K FollowingRia Schnurr @r_schnu
37 Followers 5K FollowingLeota Hoyman @LeoHoyman
27 Followers 5K FollowingHalley Galley @GalleyHall19131
36 Followers 5K FollowingDiya Randel @di_rande
25 Followers 5K FollowingParis Zaxas @zax_par
31 Followers 5K FollowingEstrella Meloche @EstrellMeloc
37 Followers 5K Following⭐️ @strynght_
0 Followers 5 FollowingSanderjacobsen @sndrjacob
3 Followers 14 FollowingEsteve jack @RealEsteveJack
1 Followers 147 FollowingJessa Madaffari @JMadaffa
76 Followers 5K Followingsixfootcandy @sixfootcandy
50K Followers 7K Following Loves animals more than most people. https://t.co/bTlLzDrFl4Annie Hatfield @AnneHatfieldVO
48K Followers 6K Following Tall, pale, relentlessly cheerful. https://t.co/vhLLPJmuO2Grant Tanaka: Honky @GrantTanaka
37K Followers 5K Following Anatomically correct. For the most part.Trey @treydayway
41K Followers 6K Following *Something profound* - @treydayway https://t.co/c64nfwFO1XSneezingWithWetMascar.. @WetMascara
20K Followers 2K Following Yes, THAT Thanksgiving tweet. My Faves: https://t.co/90HdOEinlH Recent Tweets in Link Below.Helleanor Rigby @Mom_Overboard
56K Followers 3K Following 🥪 take these broken wings and learn to fly 🏔Lil Bit 🌈 @LizerReal
59K Followers 986 Following Wife of a guy. Mother to spawns. Sugar glider in my bra. Parenting cautionary tale. (she/her)Kayla Chow Show @KaylaChowShow
47K Followers 15K Following 💙 Survived my mid-mid-life crisis. //SUPER MARRIED//BOY MOM//CATS//TACOS//SUNSCREEN//BEER//MURDERINO//LACTOSE INTOLERANT// 💙VENMO @ Kayla-Chow-ShowPresident Warren G. H.. @PopeAwesomeXIII
13K Followers 2K Following Commercially Inviable. ✌️ 29th US President (1921-1923) 🧐 Tip jar! https://t.co/Igf16XkzWv ❤ He/Him 👍 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🏴☠️ ❤️ See pinned for migration infoPieGuy @ilovepie84
30K Followers 6K Following My wife works two jobs so that I can chase my dream of being in a boy band. https://t.co/JhWCxIXYbKJessie @mommajessiec
77K Followers 6K Following *awkward silence* Mom to four, wife to one. Like I am to most things, I came here late too..:RiotGrlErin:. @RiotGrlErin
55K Followers 3K Following • goth daria vibes • fear does not exist in this bio • muppet enthusiast • reba/dolly 2024 • subscribe •The B. @anerdonfire2
37K Followers 13K Following My thoughts were full of other things when I wandered off the path. Dante Alighieri, InfernoIvsy @Ivsy01
40K Followers 9K Following drinking slurpees in front of 7-eleven with @The_Getawaygirl My thoughts in a box. my tweets 🤦♀️ https://t.co/0g8VMFzt2kAdam @adamgreattweet
63K Followers 3K Following Resident physician as seen on Buzzfeed and TV, RTd by Barack Obama. He/HimLeesh @pronouncedleash
26 Followers 59 Following If you're not your #1 biggest fan what are you doing here? crystal baby🔮 stoner fairy🍃Kinda Don’t Care..... @kinda_care
496 Followers 745 Following ™️®️ Do not inspire off ™️®️ Yet to be determined. Warning, I'm not flattered, I'm unpaid.The Best Dave you kno.. @TheFaceOfDave
7K Followers 5K Following Australia’s Favourite David and Guatemala’s Fave Dave. I've never been to either place. avi by nature colab on https://t.co/edyjqcy5Er never blue check🔸Sol🔸 @xfleshandbonesx
9K Followers 839 Following I enjoy long romantic walks around my yard with my iPhone. All photos are mine. IG: https://t.co/114ugahgO2Ms. WonderKat💫 @WonderKat365
14K Followers 5K Following •these aren't the tweets you're looking for• Wonderful Host of @WonderTagsCycleBabble @iammattgodfrey
2K Followers 364 Following Every morning many pelotons of amateur cyclists loudly pedal past my house, the snippets of “Cyclebabble” I hear are amusing and confusing. Tour De Bantz!Tippi Hedren Collider @linanneblack
5K Followers 3K Following I'm not spending time here anymore since this cursed app started showing me fan videos of actual murders.Auntie Social (parody.. @TraciGrrl
5K Followers 5K Following I'm probably going to just post whatever random garbage pops into my mind. I'm so odd I can't even. she/herchaotic idiot @chaoticcidiot
1K Followers 999 Following living my fantasy, it’s called asexual and the city https://t.co/sEkBvDBlarThings That Make Me H.. @HappyThings2020
10K Followers 4K Following What it says on the tin! I like to be grateful and spread positivity wherever I can 💜Horatio Stema @Horatio_Stema
10K Followers 11K Following Author of My Penis is a Dick, hilariously relatable about male sexuality 🔯 Openly monogamous. BLM. LGBTQ ..do unto... https://t.co/4FlW3isfBLPatrick Heaviside @PatHeaviside
711 Followers 1K Following https://t.co/YAt8Iper6z%… TTATO and Illuminerdy mouth noise maker. Avi by @WotThaFluffSamantha jeannine @sami_silvia_
38 Followers 142 Following boss b*tch 💋 Life's hard sometimes! learn to stand up and fight for yourself!ℭ𝔞𝔭𝔱𝔞�.. @dacryptid
390 Followers 424 Following Amazon. Self-Proclaimed Captain. Caffeine Cryptid. Corporate Thug. Mom. Engaged. [she/her/sir/Ustedes]Sir Michael Hfuhruhur.. @BanjoHfuhruhur
10K Followers 8K Following If you are part of the Tangerine Family, a real Blackpool fan, and you have personal issues or difficulties, I am happy to try to help. Drop me a DM. MH xDick Kimble MD PhD OB.. @dickkimble10
29K Followers 23K Following Trophy husband, never worked, lots of servants, got manflu, founded #ChurchofCashology , mothers-in-law for sale, Eton, loads of £££, modest, a real shit🌛Miss Fly By Night @MissFlyByNight
22K Followers 24K Following Fun banter | CRPS types 1&2 | PTSD | Fibro 🦋 | ♥️ HMFC | ♿️ Chronic Insomnia | Vertigo | Astronomy | F1 | 🏴 | Be kind Veggie | No DMs 🥰Kate @KateWakley
72 Followers 196 FollowingCMyBones @CyndiSaidMed
18K Followers 8K Following Adopts greyhounds & loves dogs.Come for the brains, stay for the boobs. Sexy librarian wanna be. https://t.co/2NENF8NtoePink Pineapple @Zpinkpineapple
221 Followers 556 Following My heart is not of this century but this attitude is a whole different story.a Mexican @fatcapsanliquor
1K Followers 1K Following If you don't fight everything beautiful will be taken!!!☢️ Captain Antago.. @AnOrangeSNES
10K Followers 1K Following This place is not a place of honor. No highly esteemed deed is commemorated here. Nothing valued is here.Rozanna Taylor 💋 @RozannaBanana
5K Followers 4K Following 27. Chunky. Metalhead. Tattooed & pierced. All things movies/tv. @mastrap84 is my husband. ❤️ Header by @RiotGrlErinudita | commissions o.. @tbhudita
6K Followers 3K Following she/her 🏳️🌈don’t dm me unless you want to buy art, art commissions are open, dm to booklittle miss can’t b.. @onehoppymom
1K Followers 1K Following What it all comes down to Is that I haven't got it all figured out just yet. Cause I've got one hand in my pocket and the other one is giving a peace sign. ✌️polyfawn @polyfawn_
1K Followers 444 FollowingSara @agirlhighonlife
3 Followers 25 FollowingJingle Balls @juulingjake
8 Followers 8 FollowingI like to get up at the ass crack of dawn and hang out with myself
Worship her altar Habit torn from silken flesh Praise be thy bounty #haikubitch #sinful
HAMLET: To be or not to be, that is the question. ME: There have GOT to be more than that. I mean, my kid asked 93 questions in two minutes.
The older I get, the less it takes for me to be “snowed in.”
i’m not the best at remembering what chords and chord sequences are called but i remember what they sound like, so in my head they have names like “that aggressively show-choir sequence that’s supposed to sound triumphant” and “the chord the Jordan who writes songs always uses”
Going to take advantage of this good hair day and conquer everything I set out to do
Things to say to someone battling their mental illness: • You matter. • I’m here when you need me. • I’ll never give up on you. • Is there anything I can do? • When you’re ready to talk, I’m here. • You aren’t a burden. • I promise I’m not going anywhere. • I love you.
I’m “drive-thru donuts used to taste like cigarettes” years old.
I love my kids but some days I could go for Downton Abbey style parenting where the help just brought your kid to the drawing room to roll a wooden truck around for 10 minutes while you gazed on adoringly in your flapper dress, then whisked them away to the nursery.
@4eyes3nipples Switchblade combs are absolutely key. I have a red bandanna and intimidating hand gestures.
I’ll dance around the biggest mistakes and then dive head first.