LaLaLyds @LaLa_Lyds
nostalgic for last week's tuna sandwich. knock it off. twitter.com/search?q=from%… Joined December 2018-
Tweets171K
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Followers19K
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Following4K
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Likes232K
LaLaLyds retweeted
Everything has been downhill from here. Bang up fucking whatever.
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LaLaLyds retweeted
You can only keep 2 wyd
You can call me your little pint of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream with caramel drizzle of you wanna
LaLaLyds retweeted
kids, i stumbled on some more of my tweets that i illustrated a while ago. this place is still called twitter, bu the way
LaLaLyds retweeted
What’s the matter, beautiful? Times are hard? You’re afraid to pay the fee?
LaLaLyds retweeted
When I tell a joke that doesn’t land, I follow up with a worse one to make my audience realize how good they had it with the first joke.
LaLaLyds retweeted
Oh. Well. That’s easy. I changed my mind.
LaLaLyds retweeted
I was taught not to lose sight of my goal, so I never take my eyes off my bed.
LaLaLyds retweeted
Just a casual stabbing, nothing formal.
LaLaLyds retweeted
never breaking eye contact with the waiter, i pull out a laundry detergent-sized jug of mustard & squeeze out a message on top of my pizza that reads: more pineapple, please
LaLaLyds retweeted
Life would be so much easier if I didn’t need sleep
LaLaLyds retweeted
an oriole just came to my window & said hey bitch the grape jelly is empty
LaLaLyds retweeted
I figure if I keep posting, someone is bound to pay me hush money.
LaLaLyds retweeted
You can't hurt me, I survived 80's playgrounds.
LaLaLyds retweeted
Always tell people you slept fine, otherwise they might try to offer you sleep advice.
LaLaLyds retweeted
If y'all excuse me I'm gonna go be extraordinary for a couple hours.
LaLaLyds retweeted
WHY THE FUCK ARE CHIP BAGS SO DEEP? YOU TRYING TO SHAME OUR FAT ASSES WITH GREASY FOREARMS? HUH? GIVE US WIDE BAGS. THAT RESEAL OR GIVE US DEATH, I'M FINE WITH EITHER.
LaLaLyds retweeted
Let's assemble our survival packs. First, we need a sturdy rope. Second, a machete so we don't have to eat the rope.
LaLaLyds retweeted
When I’m trying to figure out who and whom, I think of my neighbor, whom I hate.
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Everything has been downhill from here. Bang up fucking whatever.
Settling on Cassandra and loml as my favorites. Tortured Poet Selfie.
@LaLa_Lyds Wow !!!!!!!!!!! That is the ultimate !!!!!!! A complete explosion of flavor !!!!!!!! I will call you that !!!!!!
I’m out of practice in the real world
kids, i stumbled on some more of my tweets that i illustrated a while ago. this place is still called twitter, bu the way
What’s the matter, beautiful? Times are hard? You’re afraid to pay the fee?
When I tell a joke that doesn’t land, I follow up with a worse one to make my audience realize how good they had it with the first joke.
I was taught not to lose sight of my goal, so I never take my eyes off my bed.
Just a casual stabbing, nothing formal.
never breaking eye contact with the waiter, i pull out a laundry detergent-sized jug of mustard & squeeze out a message on top of my pizza that reads: more pineapple, please
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