Her Tall Boots @fuzzlime
sorry i'm not the needle in the haystack https://t.co/mcelrYf16a (featuring my one-eyed cat from the hood plus me cleaning urinals) x.com/search?q=from%… DETROIT Joined May 2009-
Tweets156K
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Followers34K
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Following5K
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Likes197K
Her Tall Boots retweeted
I will never yell at my dog because she's perfect. I'm always the one who's wrong.
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Her Tall Boots retweeted
it’s a shame your dog can’t see in color to appreciate his lovely pink sweater
Her Tall Boots retweeted
people love screens because it’s a mini vacation from real life
Her Tall Boots retweeted
last time I passed out on a Saturday night was when I sprayed too much bleach cleaner on the tub & forgot to open a window
Her Tall Boots retweeted
co-workers: talking about where they went over the weekend me: i did not spend saturday night trying to get my dog to dance with me
Her Tall Boots retweeted
It's saturday night and I'm cleaning toilets like a baller
Her Tall Boots retweeted
the last time I enjoyed the heady aroma of a sultry summer saturday night I was spraying goof-off on old latex paint spills
Her Tall Boots retweeted
I'm excited it's saturday night & I just bought a new iron
Her Tall Boots retweeted
Oooo it's saturday night i'm going to water all my succulents
i feel like using the word classy shows a definite lack of class that being said, i call myself classy
how to achieve the perfect "smokey eye": 1) apply mascara & eye liner yesterday
i wish I could add a good reverb to some of the things i say in real life
Her Tall Boots retweeted
Mostly, I regret the rebates I never received, but didn't fight for.
Her Tall Boots retweeted
I want the kind of job where you die at your desk and nobody notices for two days
Her Tall Boots retweeted
I don’t have enough relatives who like each other to be on Family Feud
Her Tall Boots retweeted
Sorry, Golden Bachelor, but I'm not interested in old people kissing
Her Tall Boots retweeted
I hate when leaving the house turns out to be a good idea.
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